The Path Not Taken
Sometimes reunions are beginnnings31 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
You did a great job creating that sense of both wariness and anticipation between a woman in the "autumn" of her years meeting up with a professor who she once had a relationship with when she was young. Great descriptions of the environment and the emotions. Best wishes in the contest!
Suggestions:
eighteen year old (eighteen-year-old)
long haired, almost woman I was (long-haired almost-woman I was)
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2021
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You did a great job creating that sense of both wariness and anticipation between a woman in the "autumn" of her years meeting up with a professor who she once had a relationship with when she was young. Great descriptions of the environment and the emotions. Best wishes in the contest!
Suggestions:
eighteen year old (eighteen-year-old)
long haired, almost woman I was (long-haired almost-woman I was)
Comment Written 10-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2021
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Thank you for your thoughtful comments and advice.
Comment from Mary Vigasin
I have to say you told this tale with vivid images and detail. You allowed in your descriptions the reality that years have passed and both have aged.
Very well done, I enjoyed the read.
Good luck in the contest.
Regards,
Mary
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2021
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I have to say you told this tale with vivid images and detail. You allowed in your descriptions the reality that years have passed and both have aged.
Very well done, I enjoyed the read.
Good luck in the contest.
Regards,
Mary
Comment Written 09-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 10-Sep-2021
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Thank you
Comment from royowen
I loved this, yes I think many renewed acquaintances have become newly relational, and what was becomes something far more meaningful in its renewed expression, I loved this post, it has lots of "atmosphere" and a lovely, matured revelation if what once was. Beautifully written, good luck, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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I loved this, yes I think many renewed acquaintances have become newly relational, and what was becomes something far more meaningful in its renewed expression, I loved this post, it has lots of "atmosphere" and a lovely, matured revelation if what once was. Beautifully written, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 09-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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Thank you
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Most welcome
Comment from Ric Myworld
This is some outstanding writing, and I'm sure it will touch base with many who shared a similar adventure back in the day. I'm sure there aren't many who get to go back and relive school days with a once or still exciting kiss. Maybe a few. I know you've smacked me with a rush of fond memories. LOL. Thanks for sharing. Wish I had a six.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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This is some outstanding writing, and I'm sure it will touch base with many who shared a similar adventure back in the day. I'm sure there aren't many who get to go back and relive school days with a once or still exciting kiss. Maybe a few. I know you've smacked me with a rush of fond memories. LOL. Thanks for sharing. Wish I had a six.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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Thank you. Glad it took you back.
Comment from Jesse James Doty
This is an engaging story set in the season of Autumn. I liked the building tension as you walked down the pathway toward your old school sweetheart yet, the ending was a little abrupt and disappointing. Might I suggest a more satisfying finish to this piece? A more romantic ending would add to the post. I do not have succinct suggestions on how to improve this...and please, take this with a grain of salt. I mean no offense, honestly.
The story has a lot of potentials and I love the descriptions of the autumn leaves. Just a little tweak of the ending would improve it substantially.
Take care,
Jesse
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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This is an engaging story set in the season of Autumn. I liked the building tension as you walked down the pathway toward your old school sweetheart yet, the ending was a little abrupt and disappointing. Might I suggest a more satisfying finish to this piece? A more romantic ending would add to the post. I do not have succinct suggestions on how to improve this...and please, take this with a grain of salt. I mean no offense, honestly.
The story has a lot of potentials and I love the descriptions of the autumn leaves. Just a little tweak of the ending would improve it substantially.
Take care,
Jesse
Comment Written 09-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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I agree, but 300 words is 300 words, so that is where the story had to end. Thanks for you hinest and helpful words.
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I understand...good luck with the contest!
Take care,
Jesse
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
A very hopeful story that proves to be hopes fulfilled. Good writing and few words to get it all said, but you did a great job. Best of luck with this in the contest.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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A very hopeful story that proves to be hopes fulfilled. Good writing and few words to get it all said, but you did a great job. Best of luck with this in the contest.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2021
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Thank you
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the An Autumn Tale writing prompt.
Your short story is well told. I like the way you use Autumn as a season of the year and of life.
Well done and I wish you good luck with the contest.
Sharon
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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I think this is a good entry for the An Autumn Tale writing prompt.
Your short story is well told. I like the way you use Autumn as a season of the year and of life.
Well done and I wish you good luck with the contest.
Sharon
Comment Written 08-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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Thank you
Comment from muffinmama
Autumn usually arouses feelings of quiet contemplation of the year just past; the Autumn of one's life tends to evoke memories filled with nostalgia. When the two meld and harmonize, anything is possible. The temptation to recapture a long-ago love as a last-ditch effort to hang on to an exciting summer is powerful.
Some of the descriptions and images really resonated with me, setting a tone of anxiety, hopefulness, maturity:
What would he see?; The enthusiastic, if still unfinished teacher/lover; I wondered why I agreed to come, and where I was going.
Your story sounds as though there is still some promise of reuniting and rekindling a youthful spark.
Comments: I didn't quite understand why she thought she was walking into the autumn of her years; she was ~ 40, no? It's a rather long walk still until she reaches that season.
Well written, beautiful images.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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Autumn usually arouses feelings of quiet contemplation of the year just past; the Autumn of one's life tends to evoke memories filled with nostalgia. When the two meld and harmonize, anything is possible. The temptation to recapture a long-ago love as a last-ditch effort to hang on to an exciting summer is powerful.
Some of the descriptions and images really resonated with me, setting a tone of anxiety, hopefulness, maturity:
What would he see?; The enthusiastic, if still unfinished teacher/lover; I wondered why I agreed to come, and where I was going.
Your story sounds as though there is still some promise of reuniting and rekindling a youthful spark.
Comments: I didn't quite understand why she thought she was walking into the autumn of her years; she was ~ 40, no? It's a rather long walk still until she reaches that season.
Well written, beautiful images.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I am glad you were touched by my words. I think of autumn as the time of harvest and plenty, and winter as the time of contemplation and resolution. Just my perception
Comment from Wendy G
As well written story for the Autumn contest. Love renewed after many years, both having changed - and yet not changed. The descriptions of the Autumn scenery are also well done. Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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As well written story for the Autumn contest. Love renewed after many years, both having changed - and yet not changed. The descriptions of the Autumn scenery are also well done. Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 08-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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Thanks.
Comment from karenina
Autu!n in the air for sure... A season of transition.... Hot sizzling summer bridged by
a canopy of changing leaves. Winter waiting...
The metaphor weaves through this once young relationship! How refreshing that things have remained free of frost!
Karenina
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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Autu!n in the air for sure... A season of transition.... Hot sizzling summer bridged by
a canopy of changing leaves. Winter waiting...
The metaphor weaves through this once young relationship! How refreshing that things have remained free of frost!
Karenina
Comment Written 08-Sep-2021
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2021
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Thank you for the lovely review!
