Secrets in the Wind
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Secrets in the Wind - Chap 6"A story of loss, deceit, murder and crime
19 total reviews
Comment from Ric Myworld
Quick and from a witty woman's point of view, it's a fun chapter with steam around the edges. And this cowboy just got restocked with bullets to reward it properly. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Quick and from a witty woman's point of view, it's a fun chapter with steam around the edges. And this cowboy just got restocked with bullets to reward it properly. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Now are we speaking of Allie or the writer.... Hmmm. No matter, I guess, because we all know the woman's point of view is the best view in town. LOL So happy to see your gun was loaded and fired a shiny bullet my way! Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from BethShelby
You've turned Jeremy into quite the flirt. I thought he was married. Am I wrong? You've got Alyassa drooling over him. This was a fun chapter. I anxious to read more.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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You've turned Jeremy into quite the flirt. I thought he was married. Am I wrong? You've got Alyassa drooling over him. This was a fun chapter. I anxious to read more.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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His wife Katherine had cancer and I will somewhere along the line mention she passed away a while ago. I figured since she had been sick (there I go killing someone off again) I could liven the story with Garth and his flirtatious ways.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Susan Newell
Now we're rolling. I love the way you handled the flirtation while weaving in relevant facts for the plot line. I see "good friend" Hank on the horizon. You kept me spellbound with the way you handle the details. I can tell you are writing what you see happening.
Notes:
Allie blew a puff of air at the strand of hair hanging across her face. -- exactly the kind of thing that makes your work so good
A smile tugged at Jeremy's mouth, which he behind his hand. -- missing the word hid
Both Allie and Jeremy could not control ==> Neither Allie nor Jeremy could control
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Now we're rolling. I love the way you handled the flirtation while weaving in relevant facts for the plot line. I see "good friend" Hank on the horizon. You kept me spellbound with the way you handle the details. I can tell you are writing what you see happening.
Notes:
Allie blew a puff of air at the strand of hair hanging across her face. -- exactly the kind of thing that makes your work so good
A smile tugged at Jeremy's mouth, which he behind his hand. -- missing the word hid
Both Allie and Jeremy could not control ==> Neither Allie nor Jeremy could control
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Hurrah! You have no idea how I worried whether others would understand the give and take of Garth and Allie. I'm not good at writing mushy stuff...so I stuck to humor and innuendos.
Glad you enjoyed it! The pot is beginning to boil!
Smiles, Carol (The stars are quite glamourous.)
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I agree, no gushy stuff! Snappy repartee and double entendres do just fine. I suspect they'll wrestle more than cuddle.
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I like the wrestling part... it can be quite fun..LOL
Comment from royowen
At least Allie thinks the accused is innocent, even though she certainly doesn't have any evidence of a that. But I think the man with the Stetson was The FBI guy in the last story, and he's back charming the ladies again, beautifully written, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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At least Allie thinks the accused is innocent, even though she certainly doesn't have any evidence of a that. But I think the man with the Stetson was The FBI guy in the last story, and he's back charming the ladies again, beautifully written, blessings Roy
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Yes, he is...Jeremy (Garth) has been on the scene already with no one detecting him. He's charming the lady reviewers as well. LOL
Smiles to you, Carol
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Heh heh
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Yes, that's our Garth alright!! LOL, she'll learn to love him, in a platonic way, lol!!! So he's found out that Allie is the best friend of the man who Elizabeth has called to help her. I take it he'll be arriving on the scene faster than she realises. I'm hopefully going to find out right now!! One little missing word, below, otherwise flawless!! :)) Sandra xx
which he (hid?) behind his hand
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Yes, that's our Garth alright!! LOL, she'll learn to love him, in a platonic way, lol!!! So he's found out that Allie is the best friend of the man who Elizabeth has called to help her. I take it he'll be arriving on the scene faster than she realises. I'm hopefully going to find out right now!! One little missing word, below, otherwise flawless!! :)) Sandra xx
which he (hid?) behind his hand
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Yes, Elizabeth should meet our hunk soon. I am glad you enjoyed the tit for tat between Allie and Garth (Jeremy). I'm not very comfortable writing mushy scenes (not like a friend of mine does- she's an expert) so I will settle for the humor and innuendos. LOL
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Judy Lawless
Introducing a hint of a love story into this already, Carol. That's always good to get attention it seems. Looks like Jeremy is already involved in this investigation. I like it. Great writing.
A couple of spags:
"which he (hid) behind his hand."
"Didn't your gut tell (you) that?"
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Introducing a hint of a love story into this already, Carol. That's always good to get attention it seems. Looks like Jeremy is already involved in this investigation. I like it. Great writing.
A couple of spags:
"which he (hid) behind his hand."
"Didn't your gut tell (you) that?"
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Hi Judy....
Many of my readers were jumping off their chairs waiting for Garth to appear so I thought they needed to have a spice along with it. LOL I am not good at writing the real mushy stuff but wit, sarcasm and humor are more my style. LOl Smiles, Carol
Comment from Wendy G
Interesting. Complications arising. And more threads with the priest leading a double life!! One little thing I noticed was a missing word in the cafe scene: should read "which he hid behind his hand ", but the word "hid" is omitted.
Enjoying this story. It's complex, won't be easy to guess the intricacies of the plot, but very readable. Well done.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Interesting. Complications arising. And more threads with the priest leading a double life!! One little thing I noticed was a missing word in the cafe scene: should read "which he hid behind his hand ", but the word "hid" is omitted.
Enjoying this story. It's complex, won't be easy to guess the intricacies of the plot, but very readable. Well done.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Fixed and re-fixed because I forgot to save...Senile old woman!! thanks for reading and enjoying the story.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from lyenochka
I was wondering if that was Garth. But he's a little too flirtatious. He sure knows how to use his good looks. Couldn't he have told Allie a little more about what he was investigating? I guess more will come later.
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reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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I was wondering if that was Garth. But he's a little too flirtatious. He sure knows how to use his good looks. Couldn't he have told Allie a little more about what he was investigating? I guess more will come later.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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His wife, Katherine, had cancer and at some point I will mention that she passed away some time ago. Garth is a very guarded man (especially undercover) and he doesn't share "his toys" to well.
Smiles, Carol
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Brilliant repartee! A battle of wits--the sparks between them flew off the page and hit me between the eyes. Hilarious bit about the waitress--vivid depiction of bubble busting!
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reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Brilliant repartee! A battle of wits--the sparks between them flew off the page and hit me between the eyes. Hilarious bit about the waitress--vivid depiction of bubble busting!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2021
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Thanks, Liz...
I hoped that you and all the readers would feel the heat generating between these two...I can feel the emotions within my heart as I write but sometimes it's difficult to express without coming off sounding corny.... An old woman trying to be sexy..Not!!!
Thanks so much, Carol