Comment from Leann DS

Excellent

I like this very unique and creative story. And although it sounds a bit like fantasy or science-fiction, who knows? It could happen. Did you know that there are actually twins who absorb their other twin and have two different sets of DNA? It's really fascinating.

If I may, I noticed a couple typos as follows:

"So, Crazy, how are we are going
remove the word "are" between "we" and "going"
to do this? In the world we come from two in one its normal, but here...
Put a comma after the word "from" and change the word "its" to "is"


Mom calmly continued:" I know you are two in one. When I was pregnant my doctor told me that I am carrying twins. Then when the time came, just one of you came out. Deep down I knew I had my twins. Then when you started to grow up somehow I heard your squabbles. You call yourself Crazy, because you are the adventurous one. You are the one who speaks his mind and takes the insane risks when he wants something. Precious on the other hand it's the shy one, a very sweet boy, which will never hurt anybody. I know it was not possible for my boy to be so different every day. I started to pray, and God helped me to see you both."
should be... "When I was pregnant "

Change to... Precious, on the other hand, is
Should be... Who will never hurt

Again, well done. Hugs to you.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

Comment from royowen

Excellent

What a fascinating story, of course we know that schizophrenia is largely misunderstood and that it is not quite what we rethink it is, bit it's also multiple personalities like the Gaderene demoniac in the Bible, with 2,000 entities, this is beautifully written, an excellent showcase, well done, blessings Roy
Typo, : Precious on the other hand (it's) the shy one. Is?

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

Comment from Susan Larson

Excellent

If Twilight Zone were still airing, I think this would be a perfect story for it. Rod Serling had nothing on you when it comes to this sort of story. I can just see it being embellished and played out. Maybe you should look into that!

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

Comment from RetroStarfish

Excellent

Great take on the contest entry.
This story was a bit hard to get into at first, but once in, it was totally engaging, entertaining and a bit spooky.
It is indeed a deep secret.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear

Excellent

This family fiction speaks a deep secret wittily, amusingly and humorously and it states secrets are safe with someone; well said, well done; thanks for sharing this. ALCREATOR

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

Comment from kahpot

Excellent

" they will look me in the mad house" should this be (lock me in....) " then he gentle invited..." should this be (gently invited....) a wonderful story, very intriguing I was captivated from the start, best wishes for your contest****kahpot

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

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reply by the author on 03-Apr-2021

Thank you so much for pointing my imperfection, your kind review helped me make this story complete:)

Comment from Elizabeth Emerald

Excellent

Intriguing prospect! Ingenious idea.

we will tell mom the [true=>TRUTH], okay?"

Then he [gentle=>GENTLY] invited his mother to sit down.

Boys, your secret [it's=>IS] safe with me."


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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2021

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reply by the author on 03-Apr-2021

Thank you so much my dear friend:)