All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "Sticky-notes"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
146 total reviews
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Superbly unique, as your voice often is, Sharyn. Love how you begin with the contemplative nature of love. The love beyo9nd any doubt. Then you take us into the depths of painful denial? At least, that's what I get from it.
The ending is brilliant. The presentation only adds to the feeling.
Great work. Has to be in with a good chance.
Av
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Superbly unique, as your voice often is, Sharyn. Love how you begin with the contemplative nature of love. The love beyo9nd any doubt. Then you take us into the depths of painful denial? At least, that's what I get from it.
The ending is brilliant. The presentation only adds to the feeling.
Great work. Has to be in with a good chance.
Av
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Thx so much Av - I didn't want to do a 'mushy' love poem (those are for greeting cards) - and thank you for catching the 'denial' - I think that element always heightens emotional impact. Remember "The King's Speech"? That cast was incredibly skilled at exactly that!
:)S
ps: what brought about the nom de plume change?
Comment from Ridley Williams
An engaging poem from the start, although the subject matter broke my heart. My wife and I have often discused the pros and cons of married and single life, (it's another matter when its not by your choice),and you have given the reader a unique insight into this challenge. Very thought prevoking, Ridley
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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An engaging poem from the start, although the subject matter broke my heart. My wife and I have often discused the pros and cons of married and single life, (it's another matter when its not by your choice),and you have given the reader a unique insight into this challenge. Very thought prevoking, Ridley
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much Ridley - yes, my husband and I have often discussed this as well. Pros and cons, always, right?
:)Sharyn
Comment from robina1978
Lovely picture to complement this poem. It is a true free verse with plenty poetic devices. But do you honestly think this makes a good entry for this contest? You just threw a lot of love away. Apart for your children and a tidy house.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Lovely picture to complement this poem. It is a true free verse with plenty poetic devices. But do you honestly think this makes a good entry for this contest? You just threw a lot of love away. Apart for your children and a tidy house.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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well, put it this way, Ine: if I read another mushy greeting-card love poem I'm going to slash my wrists!
:)))S
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I can understand that, Ine
Comment from honeytree
I love the art work and the words about love can be so true.
We can love lots of things within our lives.
We can love and help those who have some physical ailment
We help someone when they are unhappy love can grow.
Love can be special and happiness flows from within our
Heart and soul.
Honey tree
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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I love the art work and the words about love can be so true.
We can love lots of things within our lives.
We can love and help those who have some physical ailment
We help someone when they are unhappy love can grow.
Love can be special and happiness flows from within our
Heart and soul.
Honey tree
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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You are right on Honeytree - from 'within' is the only place to go for true heart and soul love - the rest will take care of itself, yes? bless you for your lovely, encouraging, and very much appreciated six on this one my dear!
:)Sharyn
Comment from Quillian
This is so good, from the sticky- notes drifting down the page to 'silly skyscrapers of congealing dishes in the sink. A lesson to remember......
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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This is so good, from the sticky- notes drifting down the page to 'silly skyscrapers of congealing dishes in the sink. A lesson to remember......
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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You've got it Quillian - thank you so much my dear!
:)Sharyn
Comment from GWHARGIS
Tom won't let me give this a six. Seems I have given you my quota for a while. This was very intense. I liked the lines about the birds diving and the sky and water meet at the edge of the earth. That was really breath taking. Nicely done.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Tom won't let me give this a six. Seems I have given you my quota for a while. This was very intense. I liked the lines about the birds diving and the sky and water meet at the edge of the earth. That was really breath taking. Nicely done.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Naughty Tom! But I do appreciate the wish, my dear - thank you so much, and I'm so glad my piece moved you.
Blessings, as always -
Sharyn
Comment from trevorletang
Thank you Visionary for your very creative way of painting the stifled heart of love. All sorts of tricks to keep the pain from the door - denial, threats, accounts of (perhaps) less intense loves - but at last order and perfection revealed the cracks.
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Thank you Visionary for your very creative way of painting the stifled heart of love. All sorts of tricks to keep the pain from the door - denial, threats, accounts of (perhaps) less intense loves - but at last order and perfection revealed the cracks.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Trevor, thank you SO much for getting the subtlety of the denials & rationalizing - I think that makes a piece more powerful, don't you? I so appreciate your wonderful six on this piece!
:)Sharyn
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
A really lovely poem. Your descriptive prose is beautiful. Such a pleasant change to read a love poem of this kind, in no way soppy. It's down to earth but emotional. The end, the sticky notes like confetti floating to the floor - that's such a good idea they way you displayed this. All precise, present and correct, etc. but silent without him. A really enjoyable read. Regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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A really lovely poem. Your descriptive prose is beautiful. Such a pleasant change to read a love poem of this kind, in no way soppy. It's down to earth but emotional. The end, the sticky notes like confetti floating to the floor - that's such a good idea they way you displayed this. All precise, present and correct, etc. but silent without him. A really enjoyable read. Regards Dorothy
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much, Dorothy, for hating SOPPY poetry. (I do, too, and didn't want to do a 'love poem' that way). I'm so delighted that you had such a wonderful response to this piece, and may I say 'thank you' for your six? So much appreciated!
Blessings,
Sharyn
Comment from Dean Kuch
Such an ardent longing and profound sadness permeates every single word of this touchingly poignant piece. I should think it's much how I would feel, now that our children have grown and flown the nest, or should my wife decide to leave this earthly realm before I do, God forbid. I know, it's selfish of me to want to go before her, leaving her behind to deal with the pain and loneliness of having lost your best friend. So be it. She's a much stronger person than I, and I'll be the first to admit it.
I do not (can not) truly know if this is how you really feel, or if this is simply a beautifully constructed free style poem. Only you know that for sure. If it was written just for artistic sake, then I commend you for being able to harness such energy without actually having to endure the pain accompanied with it. However, if it IS real, genuine emotion you've penned here, then my heart goes out to you in hopes that you can fill that lonely void one day...
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Such an ardent longing and profound sadness permeates every single word of this touchingly poignant piece. I should think it's much how I would feel, now that our children have grown and flown the nest, or should my wife decide to leave this earthly realm before I do, God forbid. I know, it's selfish of me to want to go before her, leaving her behind to deal with the pain and loneliness of having lost your best friend. So be it. She's a much stronger person than I, and I'll be the first to admit it.
I do not (can not) truly know if this is how you really feel, or if this is simply a beautifully constructed free style poem. Only you know that for sure. If it was written just for artistic sake, then I commend you for being able to harness such energy without actually having to endure the pain accompanied with it. However, if it IS real, genuine emotion you've penned here, then my heart goes out to you in hopes that you can fill that lonely void one day...
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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I didn't want to write something soggy, Dean - way too much of that around already. And being the drama queen that I am, I don't find it difficult to bring back 'emotion memory' and try scenarios on for size - especially at the moment, when my sweetie has been away for 2 months and will be away for at least one more. Good to 'use' such things for emotional 'grist' for writing, yes? but thank you for your lovely, 'feeling' & empathic review.
:)Sharyn
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I agree, Sharyn, WAY TOO MUCH sogginess...
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Comment from Cookie333
Very hard to respond with tears in my eyes, your piece was very moving. You touched a simple place inside this reader, the littl things (papers, sticky notes) and having things stay where they are, no messes
Thank you for sharing and for moving this reader with your words
K
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Very hard to respond with tears in my eyes, your piece was very moving. You touched a simple place inside this reader, the littl things (papers, sticky notes) and having things stay where they are, no messes
Thank you for sharing and for moving this reader with your words
K
Comment Written 16-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 16-Jun-2013
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Hey Cookie, I'm so glad you had a good cry with this one dear! :))Sharyn