Chronicles of the Wandering Man
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Mother Dust"An extended story in poem form
118 total reviews
Comment from rudywalsh
A good first chapter, packed filled with dark stuff, he sounds like he's walking across a dark crusted volcanoe on his way to do some dirty work.
You really know how to flow your lines and keep the reader captivated.
No doubt you will do very well with this piece,and may he find parole in the next chapter,very clever Mother Dust.
Good luck Rudywalsh.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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A good first chapter, packed filled with dark stuff, he sounds like he's walking across a dark crusted volcanoe on his way to do some dirty work.
You really know how to flow your lines and keep the reader captivated.
No doubt you will do very well with this piece,and may he find parole in the next chapter,very clever Mother Dust.
Good luck Rudywalsh.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Rudy! I'm hoping to hook people with this opening, and keep them interested with the next few chapters :-). So glad you enjoyed the read!
Mike
Comment from bookishfabler
Though deeply dark, I have to say this is one of the more interesting poems I've read in a long time. I happen to like datrk fiction, so a well writien dark poem is also a treat. I like the twylite zone theme intermingled in your words, with the man lonly walking the earth after it's destruction. Very well done.
hugs
book
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Though deeply dark, I have to say this is one of the more interesting poems I've read in a long time. I happen to like datrk fiction, so a well writien dark poem is also a treat. I like the twylite zone theme intermingled in your words, with the man lonly walking the earth after it's destruction. Very well done.
hugs
book
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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I love writing darker fiction, and I've been composing a lot of poetry recently, so this is my attempt to merge the two. Thank you for the wonderful encouragement :-)
Mike
Comment from Alexander E Poet
I thought this was excellent piece of work, the poetic piece of art. I enjoyed the flow of words, very easy to read very understandable, I thought it was imaginative and very well presented, I like the energy, and the imagery. Well done no errors hall mistakes. Alexander
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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I thought this was excellent piece of work, the poetic piece of art. I enjoyed the flow of words, very easy to read very understandable, I thought it was imaginative and very well presented, I like the energy, and the imagery. Well done no errors hall mistakes. Alexander
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Alexander. I'm really glad you enjoyed my poem :-)
Mike
Comment from Begin Again
Mike,
Quite a though provoking poem...but I do imagine that was your intent...Nuclear war and life in it's aftermath...
The Wand'ring Man's journey should prove interesting...
Very well done..disturbing to the mind, but necessary points.
Carol
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Mike,
Quite a though provoking poem...but I do imagine that was your intent...Nuclear war and life in it's aftermath...
The Wand'ring Man's journey should prove interesting...
Very well done..disturbing to the mind, but necessary points.
Carol
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Carol :-). I'm looking to write quite a few chapters to this.
Mike
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi fleedleflump,
Any anti-nuclear rhyme? Or just a general swipe at our age of consumption and waste, which I think is much more the target. Nice rhythm to your verses and the Wandering Man certainly gets about!
Patrick
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Hi fleedleflump,
Any anti-nuclear rhyme? Or just a general swipe at our age of consumption and waste, which I think is much more the target. Nice rhythm to your verses and the Wandering Man certainly gets about!
Patrick
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Patrick, you're quite right to suspect that my theme is more general. Anti-nuclear has been done to death, but the underlying drivers that lead us to play with such forces? They're both rife and rampant, and hence ripe fruit for poetic plucking!
Mike
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
What a stark and striking look at the psyche of this Wandering Man! May the positive note of hope in the last lines take hold: "I only know that I must seek a purpose where I can. Through desolation's aftermath..." Very strong writing. Best wishes, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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What a stark and striking look at the psyche of this Wandering Man! May the positive note of hope in the last lines take hold: "I only know that I must seek a purpose where I can. Through desolation's aftermath..." Very strong writing. Best wishes, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Jeanie! I'm not sure how long his tale will go on for, but I shall let him lead me to his destiny. Thanks so much for taking the time to read and share your thoughts with me :-)
Mike
Comment from miss joyce
Man's path of acts of destruction as with the passage of time becomes all too clear. A lone being wandering through the aftermath of nuclear an chemical unbalance. Dust fallout prevails as we, with humble efforts try to undo the remnants.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Man's path of acts of destruction as with the passage of time becomes all too clear. A lone being wandering through the aftermath of nuclear an chemical unbalance. Dust fallout prevails as we, with humble efforts try to undo the remnants.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Miss Joyce, for the fantastic rating! I have the next chapter all written and ready, and I've started on the third. I wasn't sure how this would be received, but I've been wanting to do an extended poem-story for some time, so I decided to just go ahead! Thanks again for the lovely review.
Mike
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Well deserved and am happy to review!
Comment from c_lucas
Nuclear war is a reality that no one wants to to face. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making an easy read.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Nuclear war is a reality that no one wants to to face. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making an easy read.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you! I don't know how far I'm going to extend this series, but I've been planning a story-poem for a while. Thanks for reading :-)
Mike
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You're welcome, Mike. Charlie,
Comment from patmedium
No, I can't say, in all honesty, that I 'enjoyed' the read...
What I CAN say is that you gave me MUCH food for thought, as I read, then reread each section, several times.
This, Mike, is a thought-provoking read... with more than a few uncomfortable points to make for your readers.
I WILL say that, as you hint there might be more... I will watch out for them and read again with interest.
Pat.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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No, I can't say, in all honesty, that I 'enjoyed' the read...
What I CAN say is that you gave me MUCH food for thought, as I read, then reread each section, several times.
This, Mike, is a thought-provoking read... with more than a few uncomfortable points to make for your readers.
I WILL say that, as you hint there might be more... I will watch out for them and read again with interest.
Pat.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Pat :-). You're right, it's not one to enjoy, but hopefully one to ponder. I have another chapter written; just needs a quick read-through, and I'm writing the third at the moment. Of course, I'll not be able to promote all of them to the front page, but I thought I'd give chapter one a fighting start! Thanks for the lovely review :-)
Mike
Comment from adewpearl
Mike, I like it - 100 years after the Earth has fallen victim to massive pollution, etc, caused by corporate greed - radiation in the air, the land dry, this wandering man living like a zombie, hopeless, in a world made into purgatory - I'm excited to read more. And the poetic stuff is good too, as I'd expect from you - interesting rhymes, great word choices that create and sustain mood - now keep the chapters coming! :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Mike, I like it - 100 years after the Earth has fallen victim to massive pollution, etc, caused by corporate greed - radiation in the air, the land dry, this wandering man living like a zombie, hopeless, in a world made into purgatory - I'm excited to read more. And the poetic stuff is good too, as I'd expect from you - interesting rhymes, great word choices that create and sustain mood - now keep the chapters coming! :-) Brooke
Comment Written 19-Apr-2010
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2010
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Thank you, Brooke :-). I'm really enjoying this. I have the next one written, and I'm writing the third one. It'll be interesting to see where my post-nuclear protagonist takes me!
Mike