Aaron's Dragons
Viewing comments for Chapter 29 "Dragons in the Palace"An aging knight finds a clutch of dragon eggs
12 total reviews
Comment from Anya Trofimova
I think that this piece reads very well. You strike the nail on the head when it comes to finding the balance between too much and too little description. Your characters are very believable (although fictional!), thanks in part to the natural and realistic dialogue. Well done!
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2020
I think that this piece reads very well. You strike the nail on the head when it comes to finding the balance between too much and too little description. Your characters are very believable (although fictional!), thanks in part to the natural and realistic dialogue. Well done!
Comment Written 16-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. I'm so glad you thought I found the right balance. You need setting, or you end up with 'talking heads' but too much and you lose the focus of the story. Glad you enjoyed.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Cindy, you know I'm intrigued about this story and about your lovely dragons. You know I'm not into fantasy writing but you keep dragging me back into the story. No pun intended. I'm sure they will settle in well in the castle. Ulla:)))_
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2020
Hi Cindy, you know I'm intrigued about this story and about your lovely dragons. You know I'm not into fantasy writing but you keep dragging me back into the story. No pun intended. I'm sure they will settle in well in the castle. Ulla:)))_
Comment Written 15-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. Glad I can keep you interested. I see the dragons causing all sorts of havoc in the castle. It's not where they were meant to be.
Comment from Kathleen S.
Interesting tale, about why humans don't have dragon queens. I like how you developed it, but at the same time I wonder at how so many dragons end up in the castle at the end of the story anyway. I think I would need to read past chapters you've written on this story to know where it's going. Still fun to read what you have in this chapter.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2020
Interesting tale, about why humans don't have dragon queens. I like how you developed it, but at the same time I wonder at how so many dragons end up in the castle at the end of the story anyway. I think I would need to read past chapters you've written on this story to know where it's going. Still fun to read what you have in this chapter.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. I hope you will catch up. Aaron found the eggs and hatched them, then the dragons helped protect the kingdom from invasion. Each dragon has a unique personality and ability. Now that Aaron will be king, he's afraid his enemies will go after the young dragons if he leaves them unguarded, so he brought them with him to the palace.
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Cindy Warren,
It's a nice piece of Fantasy Fiction having high flight of imagination,lucid wording, smooth flow throughout from the beginning to the end, and beautifully depicting its theme.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2020
Hello Cindy Warren,
It's a nice piece of Fantasy Fiction having high flight of imagination,lucid wording, smooth flow throughout from the beginning to the end, and beautifully depicting its theme.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. I'm so glad you enjoyed this chapter.
-
Cindy Warren, Most Welcome!
With best wishes,
~ RP
Comment from Bichon
You truly made the whole scenario very believable and real! From the clever dialogue, the mystical creatures and the setting, it all blended together and flowed excellently. I am very intrigued to read more!
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2020
You truly made the whole scenario very believable and real! From the clever dialogue, the mystical creatures and the setting, it all blended together and flowed excellently. I am very intrigued to read more!
Comment Written 13-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter. Hope you will catch up on the story.
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Well, the dragons will adapt to living in the castle. I enjoyed this chapter, Cindy. You did a great job detailing the move to the castle. Your words are descriptive. I could see each dragon as it explored the castle. Also, you now have some interesting ideas for future chapters (but you already know that). The dragons seem like big puppy dogs--only seem. Thanks for sharing. I look forward to the next chapter. Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2020
Well, the dragons will adapt to living in the castle. I enjoyed this chapter, Cindy. You did a great job detailing the move to the castle. Your words are descriptive. I could see each dragon as it explored the castle. Also, you now have some interesting ideas for future chapters (but you already know that). The dragons seem like big puppy dogs--only seem. Thanks for sharing. I look forward to the next chapter. Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 13-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. The dragons will have lots of fun in the castle, and cause lots of trouble. They're dragons, after all.
Comment from Shirley McLain
Excellent chapter as always. I am enjoying this story. I am eager to find out what Aaron does with the dragons. You did a great job. Take care and stay well. Shirley
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2020
Excellent chapter as always. I am enjoying this story. I am eager to find out what Aaron does with the dragons. You did a great job. Take care and stay well. Shirley
Comment Written 13-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 13-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter. I see the dragons causing lots of mischief in the castle.
Comment from JudyE
I love your dragons!
I really couldn't find any nits but one thing stood out a bit. You used 'showing off' then later had this sentence:
'As Dylan and the men escorted them to the palace, people cheered and dragons showed off.' - I might have tried to use something other than 'showed off' - maybe 'arched their necks/flapped their wings/stood as high as they could? I'm sure you could come up with better ideas than me.
Thanks for a fun read.
Judy
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2020
I love your dragons!
I really couldn't find any nits but one thing stood out a bit. You used 'showing off' then later had this sentence:
'As Dylan and the men escorted them to the palace, people cheered and dragons showed off.' - I might have tried to use something other than 'showed off' - maybe 'arched their necks/flapped their wings/stood as high as they could? I'm sure you could come up with better ideas than me.
Thanks for a fun read.
Judy
Comment Written 12-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2020
-
Thanks! I think you're right. I should fix that. It may have to wait til tomorrow, tho. I'm too tired to do it now.
Comment from damommy
I think the dragons will do well in the castle in time. If I were Aaron, I'd want to keep them with me all the time. The dragoyles are more puzzled than anyone. This should make for some interesting adventures in the future.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2020
I think the dragons will do well in the castle in time. If I were Aaron, I'd want to keep them with me all the time. The dragoyles are more puzzled than anyone. This should make for some interesting adventures in the future.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2020
-
Thanks. The castle is not the best place for dragons. I see them getting into some mischief. They'll have no idea where they should and shouldn't go. They'll make life interesting.
Comment from Mistydawn
I have a feeling Aaron has a long job ahead of him with the dragons, but I'm sure they will learn quickly, adjust. Maybe a few compromises will make it easier for them. The part about the wife was cute. The dialogue for the young dragons was spot on. People babies too perfect. Your last sentence was a great way to end it. I had to chuckle at his thought.
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2020
I have a feeling Aaron has a long job ahead of him with the dragons, but I'm sure they will learn quickly, adjust. Maybe a few compromises will make it easier for them. The part about the wife was cute. The dialogue for the young dragons was spot on. People babies too perfect. Your last sentence was a great way to end it. I had to chuckle at his thought.
Comment Written 12-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 12-Apr-2020
-
Thanks! Yes, Aaron has his work cut out for him. The dragons have no idea how to live in a palace. Things will get interesting.