Miscellaneous Poems - vol 3
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Grave Concerns"Yet more poems
22 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
I like this 5 7 5 with a twist. The dead person is crying because she doesn't understand why she had to die instead of the mourner crying.
Does this mean she will be a ghost for until she understands?
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing
Joan
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2019
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I like this 5 7 5 with a twist. The dead person is crying because she doesn't understand why she had to die instead of the mourner crying.
Does this mean she will be a ghost for until she understands?
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing
Joan
Comment Written 09-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 09-Nov-2019
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Thanks very much, Joan. Another interpretation is that somehow she wasn't really dead when she was put into the coffin... but I like your suggestion as well. Most grateful, cheers -- Craig
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You are most kindly welcome. I might be crying too if I were about to be buried alive. More like screaming and pounding the inside of the lid.
Joan
Comment from djeckert
Congrats, Craig
on the nice and effective appeal to our worst mortal fears. Imagine the horror if she gets to then go on to say, " Why did I choose to be outside of THERE?" That makes ME shudder. Blessings
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019
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Congrats, Craig
on the nice and effective appeal to our worst mortal fears. Imagine the horror if she gets to then go on to say, " Why did I choose to be outside of THERE?" That makes ME shudder. Blessings
Comment Written 07-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2019
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Haha. Thanks, Doug. I believe this is a landmark moment... the first time you've reviewed anything I've posted. Then again, I don't recall ever seeing your work either. How does that happen? In any case, much appreciated. Cheers.
Comment from BeasPeas
I guess that would put tears on anyone's face, Craig. Truly a horror story told in just a few words. Good illustration to point up your piece. Best of luck in the contest. Marilyn
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2019
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I guess that would put tears on anyone's face, Craig. Truly a horror story told in just a few words. Good illustration to point up your piece. Best of luck in the contest. Marilyn
Comment Written 05-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2019
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Thanks for the great comments and good wishes, Marilyn. Much appreciated, Craig
Comment from Pearl Edwards
This is a good one Craig. I agree I think we all, at times, would like to be the fly on the wall at our on funeral. I like the way you've written this one,
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2019
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This is a good one Craig. I agree I think we all, at times, would like to be the fly on the wall at our on funeral. I like the way you've written this one,
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 04-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2019
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That might be fun, Valda, but I really think I'd rather be really gone before they stick me in the ground or oven! (It will be oven for sure). I'm most grateful for the kind words and the wonderful rating.
Cheers, Craig
Comment from Bill Schott
This 5-7-5, Grave Concerns, has the right set up and makes one pretty sad for Susan who has we can say the news of her death was greatly exaggerated.
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2019
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This 5-7-5, Grave Concerns, has the right set up and makes one pretty sad for Susan who has we can say the news of her death was greatly exaggerated.
Comment Written 04-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 04-Nov-2019
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Yep, she's not a happy camper, Bill. Thanks very much, Craig
Comment from Teri7
Craig, This is a very unusual 5-7-5 horror poem you have penned for the contest. Coming from the deceased inside the coffin! Very good words and imagery. Best wishes in the contest. Blessings, teri
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2019
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Craig, This is a very unusual 5-7-5 horror poem you have penned for the contest. Coming from the deceased inside the coffin! Very good words and imagery. Best wishes in the contest. Blessings, teri
Comment Written 03-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 03-Nov-2019
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Thanks so much, Teri, for the lovely comments and good wishes. Poor Susan certainly doesn't seem too happy with her accommodations. Cheers, Craig
Comment from catch22
Hi Craig, this poem has a good use of irony in the 5/7/5 poem, with the correct form and syllable count. I like the use of the punctuation and formatting to give it a sense of POV. Best in the contest.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2019
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Hi Craig, this poem has a good use of irony in the 5/7/5 poem, with the correct form and syllable count. I like the use of the punctuation and formatting to give it a sense of POV. Best in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2019
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Thanks so much for the very kind comments, Pam, and also for the good wishes. Most appreciated. Craig
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You are very welcome. I hope you're doing well.
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I'm dong wonderfully, thanks Pam. Life is very good to me (hope I haven't Jonah'd myself there). Hope you are doing well too. I messed up my review of your poem, sorry. It won't let me change it.
Comment from tfawcus
Oh, dear. Poor Susie. What a way to go, but maybe she'll be saved by the bell. If she does manage to get out alive, I imagine that she'll spend the rest of her life suffering from feretrophobia.
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2019
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Oh, dear. Poor Susie. What a way to go, but maybe she'll be saved by the bell. If she does manage to get out alive, I imagine that she'll spend the rest of her life suffering from feretrophobia.
Comment Written 02-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2019
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You know, Tony, I had to look that up to see you weren't having a lend of me. That was just after I thought, "How could anyone be afraid of those cute, furry little critters?" Many thanks, Craig.
Comment from lyenochka
That would be a "grave" concern to find oneself in a coffin! Fun word play but how did he know that Susan's face was tear-stained? Or maybe he didn't and he just woke up in a box? Time to start kicking and screaming! A fun horror poem!
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2019
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That would be a "grave" concern to find oneself in a coffin! Fun word play but how did he know that Susan's face was tear-stained? Or maybe he didn't and he just woke up in a box? Time to start kicking and screaming! A fun horror poem!
Comment Written 01-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 02-Nov-2019
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It's Susan in the coffin. Thanks so much, Helen. Cheers, Craig
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Drat! I got it all wrong!
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It was meant to be sort of a misdirection, or twist. The first two lines lead you into believing Susan was grieving watching the scene, but the last line reveals she is inside. At least, that's the idea lol
Comment from Janice Canerdy
There are all kinds of fears. The fear of being buried alive probably is very real to some people. There have been actual cases of it. Your 5-7-5 is well-done--with a shocker last line.
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2019
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There are all kinds of fears. The fear of being buried alive probably is very real to some people. There have been actual cases of it. Your 5-7-5 is well-done--with a shocker last line.
Comment Written 01-Nov-2019
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2019
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Thanks for the kind comments, Janice. They are much appreciated -- Cheers, Craig