Me and You 40+ years of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "For Those Who Care "Poetry and Short Stories by George Medina Martinez
4 total reviews
Comment from Bill Schott
I think punctuation either applies or doesn't apply to poetry. This format requires a little revision, in my opinion, for that missing punctuation. Here are my suggestions:
For those who care,
(w)ho with Love give and share(;)
For those who try,
(w)hose cuts are deep(,) and yet get by,
(l)ife is sweet(;) it's a special treat(x)
to know you are there(;)
Some Love we will share.
For those who care,
who with Love give and share(;)
There is no greed(;) we fullfill each need,
(b)ecause you are the one(;)
We have such fun(;)
And if we fight, no one was right.
Our love is so deep,
(a) bond we will keep(;)
For those who care,
(w)e will always be there.
I know these are a lot of changes, but I feel these revisions clarify how this should be read. Commas have one purpose and semicolons another. One can't be the other. Periods are a toss up because a thought ends in the middle of a stanza, but the statement goes on.
Of course, everything is subjective.
Happy day.
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
I think punctuation either applies or doesn't apply to poetry. This format requires a little revision, in my opinion, for that missing punctuation. Here are my suggestions:
For those who care,
(w)ho with Love give and share(;)
For those who try,
(w)hose cuts are deep(,) and yet get by,
(l)ife is sweet(;) it's a special treat(x)
to know you are there(;)
Some Love we will share.
For those who care,
who with Love give and share(;)
There is no greed(;) we fullfill each need,
(b)ecause you are the one(;)
We have such fun(;)
And if we fight, no one was right.
Our love is so deep,
(a) bond we will keep(;)
For those who care,
(w)e will always be there.
I know these are a lot of changes, but I feel these revisions clarify how this should be read. Commas have one purpose and semicolons another. One can't be the other. Periods are a toss up because a thought ends in the middle of a stanza, but the statement goes on.
Of course, everything is subjective.
Happy day.
Comment Written 01-Jan-2019
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2019
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Thank you,
My working background was in Aerospace Quality Management, due to my disability, I am now attempting to publish a book of life's stories and poems I promised my mom to complete.
Thank you for the review and insight,
All greatly appreciated.
Comment from C. Gale Burnett
This is absolutely beautiful and a great love story!
I think most of here, especially those that have lived as a couple a lifetime together, have the fear of being left alone. It most certainly was relevant to me.
I'm so very sorry about you having health issues.
Keep writing if you can ... you have so much to contribute!
Blessings to you and yours and MERRY CHRISTMAS!
C. Gale Burnett
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2018
This is absolutely beautiful and a great love story!
I think most of here, especially those that have lived as a couple a lifetime together, have the fear of being left alone. It most certainly was relevant to me.
I'm so very sorry about you having health issues.
Keep writing if you can ... you have so much to contribute!
Blessings to you and yours and MERRY CHRISTMAS!
C. Gale Burnett
Comment Written 25-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2018
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God Bless you for the encouragement and review,
God Bless you and your family for sharing.
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And, God bless YOU & YOURS :)
Gale
Comment from Dean Kuch
Very nice rhymed poem proclaiming the love you have for Angela, your beloved wife, and the fear of being left all alone.
Thanks very much for your participation, George.
I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 22-Dec-2018
Very nice rhymed poem proclaiming the love you have for Angela, your beloved wife, and the fear of being left all alone.
Thanks very much for your participation, George.
I wish you the best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 22-Dec-2018
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Thank you for the Review and the Kind wishes.
Have a Blessed Christmas and New Year.
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And you do the same, kind sir.
~Dean
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Thank you for the Kind words and review
God Bless you and your family
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I echo those same sentiments right back to you.
Happy Holidays.
~Dean
Comment from Sugarray77
I like your sweet verse about caring and walking through life together. I especially like the following verses.
Our love is deep
A bond we will keep
For those who care
We will always be ther.
Well done and thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 22-Dec-2018
I like your sweet verse about caring and walking through life together. I especially like the following verses.
Our love is deep
A bond we will keep
For those who care
We will always be ther.
Well done and thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 22-Dec-2018
reply by the author on 22-Dec-2018
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Thank you for your Review, Have a Blessed Christmas and New Year.
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Thank you for the review and insight
God Bless you and your family