Loophole
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "The Twin"All chapters
9 total reviews
Comment from BeasPeas
Very cute wrap up for the ruse Annette pulled on her hubby posing as Chet. Innovative and interesting idea. It's true, they say we all have a double somewhere. Good story line. Marilyn
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2018
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Very cute wrap up for the ruse Annette pulled on her hubby posing as Chet. Innovative and interesting idea. It's true, they say we all have a double somewhere. Good story line. Marilyn
Comment Written 24-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2018
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Thanks, Marilyn, for reviewing both parts of this story. I wrote more details but had to drop some on account of the 1000 word limit.
Thanks for the five stars.
Marv
Comment from Gloria ....
A bowling bag is a perfect place for millions because no one would think to look in there.
This is one of the dangers of assuming a twin's life, it might not be quite what you expected.
This is a terrific entry into your senior's centre competition.
Celebrating a wedding anniversary alone might well be a common occurence.
Another fine section and wonderful wit and fast thinking.
Gloria
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2018
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A bowling bag is a perfect place for millions because no one would think to look in there.
This is one of the dangers of assuming a twin's life, it might not be quite what you expected.
This is a terrific entry into your senior's centre competition.
Celebrating a wedding anniversary alone might well be a common occurence.
Another fine section and wonderful wit and fast thinking.
Gloria
Comment Written 23-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 24-Aug-2018
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Thanks again for reviewing all three parts, at once. It's more meaningful to me that way.
Thanks for the compliments and the 5 stars.
It might be interesting to contemplate the life of twin's.
?Celebrating a wedding anniversary, alone, might well be a common occurrence.? is an interesting observation on your part.
I never explained the meaning of this sentence: ?Have another perfect night, Chet.? It refers to a perfect, 300 game in Ten Pins.
More tomorrow.
Marv
Comment from Debbie Pope
This is awesome, Marvin. I am out of six-star awards, but this piece deserves it. It is my favorite thing that you have written. I absolutely love the surprise. You really had me going. And, I was engaged throughout, reading fast to find out what was about to happen.
Great job. Glad that I read this.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2018
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This is awesome, Marvin. I am out of six-star awards, but this piece deserves it. It is my favorite thing that you have written. I absolutely love the surprise. You really had me going. And, I was engaged throughout, reading fast to find out what was about to happen.
Great job. Glad that I read this.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2018
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Your review made me extremely happy. The fact that you wanted to award a six for this piece is satisfying enough. (Remind me to sue the rules committee, when I'm done celebrating.)
Thanks for the compliments. I'm also glad you read this.
Thank you for the 5+ stars.
Marv
8-22-18
Comment from Nanny 6
Great story Marv ... did you win the contest? You sure had me going, thought for sure Fred was going to jail! Very entertaining story indeed. I like the new Chet's sense of humor.
Judy
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
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Great story Marv ... did you win the contest? You sure had me going, thought for sure Fred was going to jail! Very entertaining story indeed. I like the new Chet's sense of humor.
Judy
Comment Written 21-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
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Your review is music to my ears. Thank you very much.
I won't know the results for a good while, Judy. The awards ceremony is in early October.
Even the boss likes the new Chet.
Thanks for the five stars.
Watch for something to follow, soon.
Marv
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I?ll be waiting : )
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
The theme is Celebration! And you wrote about that theme so well in this skilful and well-written presentation. I have no corrections, no errors to point out, but I enjoyed the twin plot immensely, I was even engaged to one and suspect a couple of times they pulled a twin switch on me lol well done a wonderful write love and kindest regards Meia xx
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
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The theme is Celebration! And you wrote about that theme so well in this skilful and well-written presentation. I have no corrections, no errors to point out, but I enjoyed the twin plot immensely, I was even engaged to one and suspect a couple of times they pulled a twin switch on me lol well done a wonderful write love and kindest regards Meia xx
Comment Written 21-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
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I can not thank you enough, Meia, for this wonderful review. Thank you for all the compliments.
I have no experience with twins that I recall. What you went through could have been trouble, or was it merely a joke? Thanks for sharing that. Thank you for the five stars.
The story is over but there will be a few last words.
Marv
Comment from Lady Jane
haha, I truly thought she turned on him. Nice ending. Will there be another installment to this short write? Or, is this the end. I found no nits, or errors within this short penning. Love the dialogue and the content. Pacing was strong and steady. Good job, I like Chet!
Janelle
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
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haha, I truly thought she turned on him. Nice ending. Will there be another installment to this short write? Or, is this the end. I found no nits, or errors within this short penning. Love the dialogue and the content. Pacing was strong and steady. Good job, I like Chet!
Janelle
Comment Written 21-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2018
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Janelle
It was so nice to receive your encouraging review and I'm especially glad you liked the ending. It was supposed to end here, but I'll give some thought to adding something to it.
Thanks for all the compliments and the five stars.
Hello! I just thought of something to add and I have you to thank for it. Thank you very much, Janelle!
Marv
Comment from pome lover
a sixer for you, Senor Senior!
You packed so much into 1000 words--had more stuff happen--INCLUDING a surprise ending, it made my head swim!! and a happy ending, to boot! Heavenly days! What a writer!
You ought to be a reporter - you get a lot of facts in real fast.
good goin'!
PL
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2018
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a sixer for you, Senor Senior!
You packed so much into 1000 words--had more stuff happen--INCLUDING a surprise ending, it made my head swim!! and a happy ending, to boot! Heavenly days! What a writer!
You ought to be a reporter - you get a lot of facts in real fast.
good goin'!
PL
Comment Written 20-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2018
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Thank you very much for that six.
The ending surprised me, also. I'm really glad you liked this piece.
I could be a reporter for the Inquirer as long as I don't let truth get in my way.
Thanks for the compliments.
Marv
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well if you don't let the truth get in your way, write for the Dems. ha! Kidding. No, really, that's fiction, and you are very inventive.
Comment from heart of Lou
That was quite the surprise ending! And quite a joke for the two of them to do on each other for their anniversary. Did you win the senior's writing contest on this fun story?
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2018
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That was quite the surprise ending! And quite a joke for the two of them to do on each other for their anniversary. Did you win the senior's writing contest on this fun story?
Comment Written 20-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2018
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Thanks for reviewing and the 5 stars.
I won't know the results of the contest for a good while. I'll let you know.
Marv
Comment from Adri7enne
Pretty darn good story, where everything turns out well in the end. There's no doubt Fred has larceny in his heart but he's so charming he works his way out of it. Good job, Marvin. I hope you do well in your contest.
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2018
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Pretty darn good story, where everything turns out well in the end. There's no doubt Fred has larceny in his heart but he's so charming he works his way out of it. Good job, Marvin. I hope you do well in your contest.
Comment Written 20-Aug-2018
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2018
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Your review brought a tear to my eye. No one has ever told me those words, ?Pretty darn good story.? Simple, yet heartfelt, I know.
Thanks for the good luck wish, Adrienne.
Marv
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So glad I gave you that little boost, Marvin. You have a knack for story telling. With more practice and with competing in as many contests as possible, you'll get better and start to win some of them. Just keep writing.