Comment from Sandra du Plessis

Excellent

A very well-written poem about love and marriage goes wrong. The hearts are hurting the most when we find we reach the end of the road with a once lover who is now a stranger again.

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 29-Jun-2018

Thank you ever so much for the rating and the kind words. Both are much appreciated.

Comment from Gert sherwood

Excellent

Hello fm wright
what a mournful song . I will say it makes me feel so good that it's not me getting a divorce
I will say that your lyrics would with country western music
Gert

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 28-Jun-2018

Thank you so much for your rating and review.

reply by Gert sherwood on 28-Jun-2018

You are welcome fm wright
Gert

Comment from Xia Thornwood

Excellent

I forgot to look at your description before I read, but the meaning of the song-poem was very clear. Your words are descriptive, and the rhymes fit well. The poem touches the emotions. I have nothing to criticize.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018

Xia thank you again for your kind words about my writing and of course thank you for the rating.

Comment from Artasylum

Excellent

Hey... this is almost like a reverse lullaby for the adults telling the truth... thanks so much for this poem... good luck in your contest and as always, looking forward. yours, diana

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018

Thank you for your review and your kind and encouraging words.

Comment from kahpot

Excellent

Excellent I read this the first time as a poem then a bit quicker the second time as a song (lyrics) very well written and I would like to read again when your song is complete****kahpot

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018

Thank you for your review and your kind words of encouragement. May be a while before it becomes a complete song though.

Comment from Louise Michelle

Excellent

I can definitely imagine this as a song. Good, simple word choices to accompany music, particularly in the third stanza.

Also, I like your original take from the old nursery rhyme with bough breaking and marriages falling (as opposed to baby).

Yup, this definitely works and I enjoyed reading it.

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018

You obviously caught where the inspiration for the refrain came from. Thank you so much for your words of encouragement as well as your rating.

Comment from Teri7

Excellent

This is a very well written poem/song you have penned. As I read it I read it like a song and it sounded good to me. You used very good words that sounded like a love gone bad song. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. Maybe you should contact someone to help you get it published. Blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018

Thank you so much for your review and your rating. Appreciate your words of encouragement as well. As for getting it published I'll working on that.

Comment from LateBloomer

Excellent

Hell fm writing, Good commentary. Your poem has the makings, and the necessary heartbreak, of a country song. I like your chosen repeating line:

When the bough breaks and marriages fall
remember the heart hurts worst of all.

(Good repeating verse. I can hear it being sung along with someone strumming their guitar.)

Well-chosen complementary artwork choice. Good rhyming. A pleasure to read. Keep the blue waters flowing. LateBloomer

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2018

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018

Thank you for your rating and your kind words. Appreciate the encouragement.