Comment from Bryana

Excellent

Ine dear, cute little story about kids and their antics.
As long as nobody gets hurt, they are fun for kids to
do. Your little stories always place a smile on my face.

Have a wonderful Thursday my friend.

 Comment Written 30-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely Thursday.

Comment from l.raven

Excellent

HI Ine, kids do the darnedest things...but they can be so much fun...I love your story told...and the picture is so cute...very well written sweet girl...love ya Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely Thursday.

reply by l.raven on 01-Jul-2016

so welcome always sweet lady....love ya you...xxoo Linda

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

Hi Ine, how sweet is this, A very funny little story where they fool their father. I love it, especially when he gets the water straight into his face, Yes, rascals they are, All the best. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 29-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 30-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely Thursday.

Comment from MizKat

Excellent

Hi Ine,

What a cute little story you've written for another chapter of the Bed Time Stories. I sure enjoyed read it and I'm sure a lot more of your friends on FB will like it too. Bravo, my friend.

Kat

 Comment Written 28-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a nice second part of the week.

reply by MizKat on 29-Jun-2016

You have a great week too. Kat

Comment from Treischel

Excellent

Very playful antics are on display in this cute story about the kids crimping the water hose at their father's expense. Fun and playful.

 Comment Written 28-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a great week.

Comment from Beara Bella

Excellent

This is good. I saw the title and the picture and had to read since it reminded me of playing in the backyard with the water hose and sprinklers when I was little. I love Nikki's game with her dad. He should of looked first to see if any of his kids where up to something when the water first was stopped. He will know better next time.

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 28-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a great week.

Comment from Margaret Ford

Excellent

Good story about family fun. It made me smile.
It's well-written, with good attention to detail (punctuation, etc.).
A suggestion: Oops! I think you still need to separate your first two paragraphs.
Margaret :)

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely week, Thanks for the tip.

Comment from fionageorge

Excellent

This is a cute little story, Ine. I think most all kids have done this at some stage in the lives. And... it is so much funnier when the adult doesn't know. And, yes, the wetter the better in this hot weather. Thanks for sharing and warmest regards, Marijke :o)

 Comment Written 27-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely week,

Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

The "wetter the better" is a neat conclusion. I enjoyed your charming bedtime story and the realistic dialog and action. Smiles and sweet dreams- Joan

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely week,

Comment from Lynn27

Good

This a cute story and very charming as well.

There is a lot of telling throughout this piece the reason for the rating.


It is extremely hot today. (This is telling. Show me hot it is?)

My version: Under the hot blazing making the flowers drooping in the garden, but the young children didn't cared wearing their swimsuits dashing in and out of the water.



Wait a second, rascals!" he shouts while on the chase with the hose after Nikki. In less than a minute he catches Nikki and Douglas. He gives the pair a huge shower, but they don't mind at all (this is showing and you did an excellent job!)


Lynn

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 26-Jun-2016

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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2016

Thanks for your kind review, Ine. Have a lovely week,