2015 Haiku
Viewing comments for Chapter 52 "haiku ( viewing a cold grave )"A collection of haiku I wrote in 2015
15 total reviews
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is a very good haiku. Lines one and two interconnect perfectly and line three (seeing from the picture whose grave it is) is a good and frightening satori. Effective alliteration in line 2. Good Luck in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
This is a very good haiku. Lines one and two interconnect perfectly and line three (seeing from the picture whose grave it is) is a good and frightening satori. Effective alliteration in line 2. Good Luck in the contest. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 24-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
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thank you dorothy :)
Comment from Judgement Dave
I did like that - it raised a smile that was probably more of a grin.
Though, as it is, it really needs the image of Poe's headstone.
Would it maybe be worth changing the opening line to 'viewing Poe's cold grave'? as then the words work better in isolation (in my opinion, and it's just my opinion).
Good luck in the contest!
Cheers
JD
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
I did like that - it raised a smile that was probably more of a grin.
Though, as it is, it really needs the image of Poe's headstone.
Would it maybe be worth changing the opening line to 'viewing Poe's cold grave'? as then the words work better in isolation (in my opinion, and it's just my opinion).
Good luck in the contest!
Cheers
JD
Comment Written 24-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
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thank you dave :)
Comment from Jackarrie
This is a very good entry into the haiku contest about graves. what a great pic of Edgar Allan Poe's grave.
viewing a cold grave
I ponder weak and weary
a bad omen
A very cold place to be at a graveside.
Good luck in the contest. Mary
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
This is a very good entry into the haiku contest about graves. what a great pic of Edgar Allan Poe's grave.
viewing a cold grave
I ponder weak and weary
a bad omen
A very cold place to be at a graveside.
Good luck in the contest. Mary
Comment Written 24-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
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Thank you Mary :)
Comment from Eric1
Hi Mystery author, this is an excellent entry for this particular Haiku competition, your words and the image created by them are outstanding, I wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend,
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
Hi Mystery author, this is an excellent entry for this particular Haiku competition, your words and the image created by them are outstanding, I wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend,
Comment Written 24-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2015
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Thank you Eric :)
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You are welcome my friend.
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
This meets the contest requirements beautifully with a correct line and syllable count. This is quite clever to use Poe as the central theme in this well penned piece. I wish you all the best in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2015
This meets the contest requirements beautifully with a correct line and syllable count. This is quite clever to use Poe as the central theme in this well penned piece. I wish you all the best in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2015
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Thank you Mystic Angel :)
Comment from Megalips
I didn't see the alert, but have no doubt who wrote this....and where is the Cognac? I love Poe's work...and his personal history is such a writer's tragedy, so classic. I like how you got that "ponder weak and weary" in there...nice touch. Great dedication...got the Raven there at the end...well done and good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2015
I didn't see the alert, but have no doubt who wrote this....and where is the Cognac? I love Poe's work...and his personal history is such a writer's tragedy, so classic. I like how you got that "ponder weak and weary" in there...nice touch. Great dedication...got the Raven there at the end...well done and good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 22-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2015
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Thank you :)
Comment from w.j.debi
Quoth the raven...this is an ominous sign. This is a perfect pairing of artwork and verse. You certainly nailed the theme and to chilling effect. I wish you the beet of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2015
Quoth the raven...this is an ominous sign. This is a perfect pairing of artwork and verse. You certainly nailed the theme and to chilling effect. I wish you the beet of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2015
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Thank you :)
Comment from Amy Greta
Ooooo! I love Edgar Allan Poe, and you crafted a perfect haiku with an eerie feel to match the mysterious and unusual, yet classic poet. "bad omen" and "The Raven"...it gives me chills. I can just imagine how Poe's grave is a spooky gathering place for all the lost souls. Excellent poem!
Amy
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2015
Ooooo! I love Edgar Allan Poe, and you crafted a perfect haiku with an eerie feel to match the mysterious and unusual, yet classic poet. "bad omen" and "The Raven"...it gives me chills. I can just imagine how Poe's grave is a spooky gathering place for all the lost souls. Excellent poem!
Amy
Comment Written 22-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2015
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Thank you Amy :)
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
This is an interesting poem with all the clues and the quotation from Poe's "The Raven." Good luck to you in the contest, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2015
This is an interesting poem with all the clues and the quotation from Poe's "The Raven." Good luck to you in the contest, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 22-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2015
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thank you jeanie mercer :)
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this "grave" haiku, I have a friend of mine that loved to visit cemeteries. I was in the country one day and spotted a road that went up a hill. I found 4 gravesites. one headstone wrote that the man dies sometime in the winter because his body was found in spring. another died from consumption. I took him there and he loved it. good luck in the cootnest.
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2015
this is an excellent write, mystery writer, you did an excellent job writing this "grave" haiku, I have a friend of mine that loved to visit cemeteries. I was in the country one day and spotted a road that went up a hill. I found 4 gravesites. one headstone wrote that the man dies sometime in the winter because his body was found in spring. another died from consumption. I took him there and he loved it. good luck in the cootnest.
Comment Written 22-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2015
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Thank you sweetwoodjax :)