Comment from Selina Stambi

Excellent

Hi Aiona,

This is a serious subject, but your presentation is light and brought on a half smile (just a little one! :)

I like the creative rhyme in "sheeple".

Best wishes for the contest.

Until next time,

Sonali :)

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Dec-2014

Thank you, Sonali. :)

Comment from Judy Couch

Excellent

You stated your ideas well and illustrated why you think as you do. Sometimes the customer is out to cheat you and you need to take a stand. Your rhyme is good. I liked the way you expressed your ideas.

 Comment Written 28-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 28-Nov-2014

Thank you.

Comment from nomi338

Excellent

Bravo! You are so right. If you have a court date for a specific day and time and you just show up when you get ready to show up what do you think the judge is going to do? Make allowancs? What about the IRS? People pull that inconsiderate crap only on those that they think they can get away with it. It is time for businesses everywhere to stand up and stop being walked on. Again I say bravo! This works so well whether as prose or as a poem.

 Comment Written 27-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014

Oh shucks... I just realized the contest requires it be a poem, not prose... Oops! But thank you for your review.

reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014

I changed it to a poem.... does it still convey the same meaning?

Comment from GracieAnn

Excellent

This Betrayal writing prompt entry is reasonable and rational in its thought process. It is appropriate to those who seem to have the entitlement attitude in any service industry. Well crafted. All the best in the contest. :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 27-Nov-2014

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reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014

I re-read the criteria. It was supposed to be a poem, not prose. Oops! But thank you for your review.

reply by the author on 27-Nov-2014

I changed it to a poem.... does it still convey the same meaning?