Nature's Poetic Voice.
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Sunset's Goodbye."A sensory appreciation of nature.
7 total reviews
Comment from Treischel
Nicely captured in picture and verse. This unrhymed poem is excellent blank verse, for even though is doesn't rhyme, it flows like it does and is carried well by virtue of its poetic imagery and consistent tetrameter. Well done!
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2014
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Nicely captured in picture and verse. This unrhymed poem is excellent blank verse, for even though is doesn't rhyme, it flows like it does and is carried well by virtue of its poetic imagery and consistent tetrameter. Well done!
Comment Written 09-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 10-Apr-2014
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Thank you for your continued support.
I appreciate your time and generous review.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
What a beautiful shot you managed to capture here. Your poem was lovely, sharing not only the imagery of a sunset but also the beauty and awe with our sight that always fills the heart with warmth.
Lovely post my friend.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2014
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What a beautiful shot you managed to capture here. Your poem was lovely, sharing not only the imagery of a sunset but also the beauty and awe with our sight that always fills the heart with warmth.
Lovely post my friend.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
Comment Written 07-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2014
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Thank you Maureen.
Your review and comments are appreciated.
I live to the east of the valley so I don't often get to see
the spectacular sunsets up close.
I just happened to be coming home from the west so I was lucky
Indeed to get the picture.
Comment from Sam Mendonca
First let me say what a beautiful photo. You capture the sunset at the perfect time.
I enjoy watching the sunset, it's like a sign the day is over and new beginning come tomorrow.
You did an excellent write describing this.
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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First let me say what a beautiful photo. You capture the sunset at the perfect time.
I enjoy watching the sunset, it's like a sign the day is over and new beginning come tomorrow.
You did an excellent write describing this.
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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Thank you.
I appreciate your review.
Comment from Sankey
What a great poem. I have a heap of photos taken of our Sunsets and Sun rises. The aspect of our house faces East and West. East to the back of the house and West to the front. Thanks really good.
One spag...touches (th)e sky
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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What a great poem. I have a heap of photos taken of our Sunsets and Sun rises. The aspect of our house faces East and West. East to the back of the house and West to the front. Thanks really good.
One spag...touches (th)e sky
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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Thank you for a lovely review.
I'm so glad you liked it.
Comment from l.raven
OMG Shirley, this is just beautiful...I love sunrise and sundown...both are stunning....your poem puts the reader right there...watching it with you...beautiful...so very well written..and I love the picture...luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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OMG Shirley, this is just beautiful...I love sunrise and sundown...both are stunning....your poem puts the reader right there...watching it with you...beautiful...so very well written..and I love the picture...luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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Thank you Linda.
I appreciate your heartfelt review.
I'm so glad that you enjoyed it.
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soooooooooo welcome Shirley...luff
Comment from Nosha17
You have painted some nice images of the sunset with your good choice of words. It had a smooth read and was most enjoyable with super illustration. Faye
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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You have painted some nice images of the sunset with your good choice of words. It had a smooth read and was most enjoyable with super illustration. Faye
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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Thank you.
I appreciate your generous review.
Comment from The Death
Hi,
A beautiful poem which captures the charm of sunset.
The imagery is vivid and strong as well.
As you have opted for minimal punctuation, I won't be commenting on its use.
The first line has 9 syllables, so you might want to adjust it to 8 for consistent rhythm.
As the sun sets over the valley,
It seems the Earth touches the sky.
It's I who now will stand and watch
The sun prepare today's goodbye.
If you switch the places of 'now' and 'will', it will read well. Nice opening here with consonance of S.
An already perfect canvas,
Will today be transformed anew,
As a multi-coloured palette,
Is painted deftly in the sky.
There is a question mark missing at the end of the second line here.
All else reverts to the background(.)
Sun's golden glow steps to the fore.
I'm enchanted by such beauty,
As my eyes gaze transfixed in awe.
Shows the magnificence of this happening and its effect. Good use of G alliteration.
I can't wait until tomorrow,
To repeat this magic anew,
So I quickly raise my camera,
To capture this image so true.
Simple closing, but very effective and apt. To avoid the repetition of 'anew', consider:
To again see its charm renew
These are just suggestions, so you keep all the stars.
It was an enjoyable read. :)
Regards,
Anupam
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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Hi,
A beautiful poem which captures the charm of sunset.
The imagery is vivid and strong as well.
As you have opted for minimal punctuation, I won't be commenting on its use.
The first line has 9 syllables, so you might want to adjust it to 8 for consistent rhythm.
As the sun sets over the valley,
It seems the Earth touches the sky.
It's I who now will stand and watch
The sun prepare today's goodbye.
If you switch the places of 'now' and 'will', it will read well. Nice opening here with consonance of S.
An already perfect canvas,
Will today be transformed anew,
As a multi-coloured palette,
Is painted deftly in the sky.
There is a question mark missing at the end of the second line here.
All else reverts to the background(.)
Sun's golden glow steps to the fore.
I'm enchanted by such beauty,
As my eyes gaze transfixed in awe.
Shows the magnificence of this happening and its effect. Good use of G alliteration.
I can't wait until tomorrow,
To repeat this magic anew,
So I quickly raise my camera,
To capture this image so true.
Simple closing, but very effective and apt. To avoid the repetition of 'anew', consider:
To again see its charm renew
These are just suggestions, so you keep all the stars.
It was an enjoyable read. :)
Regards,
Anupam
Comment Written 06-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 07-Apr-2014
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Thank you.
I appreciate your detailed and generous review.
I have taken note of your suggestions and made a
couple of changes.
:-)