Mike Radshaw and the Black Dawn
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Sugarland Saga - BD6"The grim reaper casts his pall over London
15 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
I like your miniature sugar-coated minotaur. And he talks like a four-year-old, unable to pronounce "R"-initial words. (In the last line, you might want to change "Radshaw" to "Wadshaw" to be consistent, unless a change is happening. And Radshaw now has to rethink his mission if all that Azza says is true about the Angwrath.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
  |
I like your miniature sugar-coated minotaur. And he talks like a four-year-old, unable to pronounce "R"-initial words. (In the last line, you might want to change "Radshaw" to "Wadshaw" to be consistent, unless a change is happening. And Radshaw now has to rethink his mission if all that Azza says is true about the Angwrath.
Comment Written 16-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
-
Thank you, Helen :-). I tried to effect a gradual reduction in the w/r substitutions so dignify Azza being influenced by Mike's thoughts. Indeed, the game had changed...
Mike
Comment from Cindy Warren
I almost felt sorry for the ridiculous creature, except that he really is a demon at heart. Maybe it's a fitting punishment. What if the Angwrath doesn't do what Mr. Black wants it to? Seems to me something that messed up might not be all that reliable.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
|
I almost felt sorry for the ridiculous creature, except that he really is a demon at heart. Maybe it's a fitting punishment. What if the Angwrath doesn't do what Mr. Black wants it to? Seems to me something that messed up might not be all that reliable.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
-
Thanks so much, Cindy :-). Indeed, who know whether it's possible to control or even influence such a being?
Mike
Comment from John Ciarmello
Your imagination is rediculous! (in a good way). I loved every bit of this chapter, Mike. The Angwath, Azza>(love him). This story is super creative! I can't wait to keep reading. Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
|
Your imagination is rediculous! (in a good way). I loved every bit of this chapter, Mike. The Angwath, Azza>(love him). This story is super creative! I can't wait to keep reading. Best, JohnC
Comment Written 12-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
-
Thanks John :-). This is one of my favourite sequences, if a tad sticky!
Mike
Comment from royowen
I couldn't help but read your enjoyment at writing this episode with the long verbal discourse between the Radshaw and sweetie sweating creature, and it's less than malevolent info passing, but dips I detect a more than pleasant reaction at the end. As always your timing is immaculate. Beautifully written Mike, blessings Roy
Typo : An inflated (rubbed) glove. Rubber?
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
|
I couldn't help but read your enjoyment at writing this episode with the long verbal discourse between the Radshaw and sweetie sweating creature, and it's less than malevolent info passing, but dips I detect a more than pleasant reaction at the end. As always your timing is immaculate. Beautifully written Mike, blessings Roy
Typo : An inflated (rubbed) glove. Rubber?
Comment Written 12-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
-
Thanks so much, Roy :-). I remember wondering whether I'd gone too silly with this chapter but it's so much fun, I think it still works. I can't believe there's still a typi in there! Many thanks for the catch.
Mike
-
Well done
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
I think I preffered the violent sections of this revive to this sickly impression of what evil imagines 'good' to be like. They were less complex to my mind. Could the opposite of this convoluted created environment really be 'evil'? I guess we will soon find out. I can't wait. Kate xx
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
|
I think I preffered the violent sections of this revive to this sickly impression of what evil imagines 'good' to be like. They were less complex to my mind. Could the opposite of this convoluted created environment really be 'evil'? I guess we will soon find out. I can't wait. Kate xx
Comment Written 12-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2022
-
Lol, thanks Kate :-). I now have the image of the Angwrath returning to Earth to crusade against sugar and bring back black and white films!
Mike
Comment from Michaela Moore
Your humor is always the elixir of my soul! And this chapter of this book doesn't disappoint. And your creativity in the mythology that you are creating is priceless. I laughed out loud many times and always enjoy how unexpected, and unique your figurative language and diction choices are. Many exceptional surprises anytime I read your work.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2022
|
Your humor is always the elixir of my soul! And this chapter of this book doesn't disappoint. And your creativity in the mythology that you are creating is priceless. I laughed out loud many times and always enjoy how unexpected, and unique your figurative language and diction choices are. Many exceptional surprises anytime I read your work.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2022
-
Thanks so much, Michaela :-). I'd say this was fun to write but it was also hard work. It's been fun getting feedback from new readers!
Mike
Comment from Ric Myworld
Yes, we must all be careful what we wish for; especially, with those remarks given to the owner of a jackhammer. LOL. Thanks for sharing another fine chapter.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2022
|
Yes, we must all be careful what we wish for; especially, with those remarks given to the owner of a jackhammer. LOL. Thanks for sharing another fine chapter.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2022
-
Thanks so much, Ric - I'm really glad you enjoyed it :-)
Mike
Comment from Hitcher
What the... f*ck :) I think you have just fused The Life of Brian with The Magic Roundabout and The Wizard of OZ, how the fuck you did it i just don't know but it definitely worked. I didn't see that one coming at all Mike, I think it was a touch of brilliance, you is da man!!
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
 |
What the... f*ck :) I think you have just fused The Life of Brian with The Magic Roundabout and The Wizard of OZ, how the fuck you did it i just don't know but it definitely worked. I didn't see that one coming at all Mike, I think it was a touch of brilliance, you is da man!!
Comment Written 02-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2013
-
I'm quite relieved - this chapter is a trip to nutsville and no mistake, but as soon as I thought of the candy minotaur who's actually a fallen angel, I knew I had to use him. As it turned out, it worked well as a way to fill in plot and background too. I love it when a plan cones together, lol
Mike
Comment from Cookie333
I really enjoy your writing, only now I have a craving for something sweet. I don't think I would have the control that he had, I probably would have just chowed down. Your voice keeps me laughing I love the sense of humor interspersed in your write
Thanks so much
K
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2013
|
I really enjoy your writing, only now I have a craving for something sweet. I don't think I would have the control that he had, I probably would have just chowed down. Your voice keeps me laughing I love the sense of humor interspersed in your write
Thanks so much
K
Comment Written 28-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2013
-
Lol, thank you :-). I almost had Radshaw take a bite but it might have got nasty at that point. Next chapter is well underway. I'm really glad the humour works.
Mike
Comment from lindalcreel
This was an extraordinary read. I love the twist of him facing something beautiful instead of a swarm of demons. This is a great read with strong characters, good dialogue,(I loved the baby talk), and a believable plot which flows at a nice pace. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2013
|
This was an extraordinary read. I love the twist of him facing something beautiful instead of a swarm of demons. This is a great read with strong characters, good dialogue,(I loved the baby talk), and a believable plot which flows at a nice pace. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2013
-
Thanks so much, Linda :-). Mike Radshaw can be hard to write at times because his fairly intense character needs some immersion on my part. I always enjoy writing his tales though. I'm really happy you liked this chapter. Next one is well underway.
Mike
-
Welcome:)
