Comment from Ridley Williams

Excellent

A wonderful, well thought out piece. I like how the first stanza portrays someone looking for answers. Your meter suggests you may have a musical background because of the great flow. I stumbled in one spot, so if I may humbly suggest...2nd stanza, "I've searched for your presence in castles and caves, in forests of dark blackness and lost unmarked graves". This is just a suggestion, never let anyone change something your adamant about, all my best, Ridley

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2013

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reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013

Thanks for the kind review. It is appreciated.

Norm

Comment from Lady Veloce

Excellent

I think the un-evenness of your lines added a nice touch to the format of the poem--emphasized the short lines, made you slow down to read the longer ones. The content, also, was very nicely done. Especially loved the 3rd stanza; brilliant how well those words worked together.

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2013

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reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013

Thanks for the kind review. It is greatly appreciated.

Norm

Comment from zeldasmith

Excellent

I like the rhyming. The long sentences could be cut in half so that they are consistent with the others. This is mysterious but why didn't you choose a pic to go with this, it would give it appeal.

 Comment Written 06-Jul-2013

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reply by the author on 06-Jul-2013

I took your advice on this poem.

reply by zeldasmith on 06-Jul-2013

Good.