All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Asleep in the Sun"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
49 total reviews
Comment from poetbear
Another gem from you.
It glistens and shines better and makes you think.
You are a creative and original poetsss and I enjoy your work.
You inspire me to write better.
Well written and original.
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2013
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Another gem from you.
It glistens and shines better and makes you think.
You are a creative and original poetsss and I enjoy your work.
You inspire me to write better.
Well written and original.
Comment Written 21-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2013
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oh I'm so glad you loved this one - I did too! blessings for your lovely six my dear! :)S
Comment from adewpearl
love the alliteration in scribbling about sunlight
nice consonance of L sounds too in those opening lines
a tumult of clouds - I like that!
great use of enjambment to keep your lines flowing
I like the internal rhyme in tickles/prickles
and in alone/unknown
intense expression of emotion
in a most emotionally-charged closing
Brooke
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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love the alliteration in scribbling about sunlight
nice consonance of L sounds too in those opening lines
a tumult of clouds - I like that!
great use of enjambment to keep your lines flowing
I like the internal rhyme in tickles/prickles
and in alone/unknown
intense expression of emotion
in a most emotionally-charged closing
Brooke
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much for your excellent review, Brooke. I really notice an increased depth of your reviewing this last month! Sounds like the Committee has been on your tail too????
:)Sharyn
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The committee does not speak to me nor I to them. They decided years ago I was a lost cause, and I decided years ago they could go to hell. LOL :-)
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oh you do make me laugh Brooke! I've just been having 'conversations' with them too! :))) But seriously, even without them, I've really noticed your reviews are in greater depth now, which I really, REALLY appreciate! :)))S
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Hi Sharyn,
This is a beauty my friend. I loved it, great sensory appeal and more it just reminds us to live the moment not write the moment. One of my constant pleasure is getting outside into nature rural or urban and living, feeling, being the moment itself.
This is fabulous wish I had a six for you this one would of got it.
Thanks for sharing it,
Maureen
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Hi Sharyn,
This is a beauty my friend. I loved it, great sensory appeal and more it just reminds us to live the moment not write the moment. One of my constant pleasure is getting outside into nature rural or urban and living, feeling, being the moment itself.
This is fabulous wish I had a six for you this one would of got it.
Thanks for sharing it,
Maureen
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much Maureen! I always appreciate your feedback. :)S
Comment from Tonulak
Dear Sharon,
This beautiful poem starts simply; the urge to live instead of writing about. The nap in the sun covers the pure sensory joy, but invites complex feelings that seep into the mind when the quiet comes. this one really deserves a six...it's stunning--Ted
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Dear Sharon,
This beautiful poem starts simply; the urge to live instead of writing about. The nap in the sun covers the pure sensory joy, but invites complex feelings that seep into the mind when the quiet comes. this one really deserves a six...it's stunning--Ted
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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I'm so glad you liked this one Ted!! Simpler than most pieces, but I'm so glad you understood the layers there. I love it when you love my work because I value your opinion a great deal!
:)Sharyn
Comment from Hawaiian Mermaid
Aloha Sharyn,
Whatever you're feeling, bathing it is in the Son light will help. I like your poem full of emotion.
Aloha, Ginger
[Glitterfy.com - *Glitter Photos*]
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Aloha Sharyn,
Whatever you're feeling, bathing it is in the Son light will help. I like your poem full of emotion.
Aloha, Ginger
[Glitterfy.com - *Glitter Photos*]
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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It always does, Ginger! LOVE your glitterfly!!! :)))Sharyn
Comment from Adora Bayles
My, you are prolific! And so diversified. If I were to lie in the grass on our new property in upstate New York, I would probably drown. We want desperately to put seed into our 68 acres but the rain has been heavy for days and days. Your poem is lovely in its peaceful, sun worshipping way. Keep it up.
Conni
Aka Adora
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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My, you are prolific! And so diversified. If I were to lie in the grass on our new property in upstate New York, I would probably drown. We want desperately to put seed into our 68 acres but the rain has been heavy for days and days. Your poem is lovely in its peaceful, sun worshipping way. Keep it up.
Conni
Aka Adora
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Thx Conni - actually it's been raining cats & dogs for the last month here as well! But I'm lucky - I can always escape to the beach, which is usually hot and dry! :)))
Comment from lorijean
A lovely poem again, full of strong feelings and love, a pleasure to read again and the artwork is just perfect, thank you for sharing....
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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A lovely poem again, full of strong feelings and love, a pleasure to read again and the artwork is just perfect, thank you for sharing....
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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thx lj! :)S
Comment from Darkhorse555
in the nature within the suns shine your eyes flourishing upon the pen flowing down your piece you certainly came up with a good write
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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in the nature within the suns shine your eyes flourishing upon the pen flowing down your piece you certainly came up with a good write
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Thx Dh! :)S
Comment from sunnilicious
To be alone is not the same as being lonely. When stuck in the situation we all need time to think and cry. This is an insightful poem with some good wisdom. Enjoyable read. Excellent work.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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To be alone is not the same as being lonely. When stuck in the situation we all need time to think and cry. This is an insightful poem with some good wisdom. Enjoyable read. Excellent work.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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thx so much Sunni! :)S
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Sharyn,
Your this poem reminds me of the 'Niagara Falls'. Like the Niagara it flows, falls and falls asleep giving all around a very pleasant sight.
"....to seed my heart, sore in need of nourishment and constancy. You've made it clear that you probably won't return....and the self explanatory questions in the last stanza" are marvelous.
Its language is simple having spontaneous flow with lively imagery and pictorial quality.
Superb indeed!
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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Hello Sharyn,
Your this poem reminds me of the 'Niagara Falls'. Like the Niagara it flows, falls and falls asleep giving all around a very pleasant sight.
"....to seed my heart, sore in need of nourishment and constancy. You've made it clear that you probably won't return....and the self explanatory questions in the last stanza" are marvelous.
Its language is simple having spontaneous flow with lively imagery and pictorial quality.
Superb indeed!
Comment Written 14-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2013
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thx so much RP! Blessings, :)Sharyn