All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Buried Treasure"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
39 total reviews
Comment from ephraim crud, COS.
excellent entry for the free verse contest Sharyn - both poignant but not without your usual bit of wit. very best of luck c and e ;) xx
reply by the author on 30-May-2013
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excellent entry for the free verse contest Sharyn - both poignant but not without your usual bit of wit. very best of luck c and e ;) xx
Comment Written 29-May-2013
reply by the author on 30-May-2013
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and thank you for this one too!!! PLEASE do go read "Too Many Birds Are Singing" if you have time - it's paying $$ and I think it will be right up your alley! (And pass it on to Indie please)
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funnily enough, indie's twin connie is with me now, so we will review it together ;)
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well give her a huge kiss for me!
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my pleasure! consider it done :)
Comment from donaldww
There is some buried treasure in your free verse poem--not literally, of course, although I'm sure you'd laugh if I said there was.
After discovering an assortment of knick-knacks in the box, the poet contemplates the nature of the journey ahead.
Excellent poem!
Cheers,
DW
reply by the author on 30-May-2013
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There is some buried treasure in your free verse poem--not literally, of course, although I'm sure you'd laugh if I said there was.
After discovering an assortment of knick-knacks in the box, the poet contemplates the nature of the journey ahead.
Excellent poem!
Cheers,
DW
Comment Written 29-May-2013
reply by the author on 30-May-2013
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thx so much DW! Haven't seen you posting so much lately? :)S
Comment from vkmack
Oh, Sharyn. Marvelous. This made my cry--good tears though. What a wonderful ode to your dad and your love for him. Each word is so tender and thoughtful. I have to tell you, as I was reading this, the 10:30 pm train came through town, just down the hill, blowing through gently on the night breeze. It sounded lonely and forlorn, like the sea winds, and it just seemed a perfect accompaniment for this work. Oceanic is one of my favorite words. It conjures so many beautiful images--coral and starfish and windblown sails and scented breezes. You just capture it all here. This is just so touching. What a wonderful memory of your dad. The ending--that last stanza--is perfection. It's just a simple confection that nestles atop this little delight. Magical. You made me wish I were a mermaid, just as I used to when I was very small. Thanks for reminding me of that long ago dream. It's just right for bedtime.
reply by the author on 29-May-2013
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Oh, Sharyn. Marvelous. This made my cry--good tears though. What a wonderful ode to your dad and your love for him. Each word is so tender and thoughtful. I have to tell you, as I was reading this, the 10:30 pm train came through town, just down the hill, blowing through gently on the night breeze. It sounded lonely and forlorn, like the sea winds, and it just seemed a perfect accompaniment for this work. Oceanic is one of my favorite words. It conjures so many beautiful images--coral and starfish and windblown sails and scented breezes. You just capture it all here. This is just so touching. What a wonderful memory of your dad. The ending--that last stanza--is perfection. It's just a simple confection that nestles atop this little delight. Magical. You made me wish I were a mermaid, just as I used to when I was very small. Thanks for reminding me of that long ago dream. It's just right for bedtime.
Comment Written 29-May-2013
reply by the author on 29-May-2013
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What a gorgeous, gorgeous review vk! I'm totally honored by your words (and, of course, by your wonderful six). Love the "confection" words - a lady with true soul and I'm lucky to have such a reader.
Blessings, big-time -
Sharyn
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I was lucky to find such a wonderful piece to read. Thanks again, Sharyn. And you are welcome.
Vista Kay
Comment from DALLAS01
Wrestling with the old-fashioned clasp, I give her a wink
As she embarks upon the search for buried treasure
Mapped by her father, whose ship has long since sailed. She
sniffs the winds of the unknown, wondering ... about the journey ahead
What a gem this last stanza is. And what a joy it must have been to have these treasured memories triggered unexpectedly.
reply by the author on 29-May-2013
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Wrestling with the old-fashioned clasp, I give her a wink
As she embarks upon the search for buried treasure
Mapped by her father, whose ship has long since sailed. She
sniffs the winds of the unknown, wondering ... about the journey ahead
What a gem this last stanza is. And what a joy it must have been to have these treasured memories triggered unexpectedly.
Comment Written 29-May-2013
reply by the author on 29-May-2013
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It was, my dear ... amazing what we choose to keep in all our tucked away hiding-places, both in the house, literally, and in our memories, hmm?
Blessings,
Sharyn
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:.)
Comment from Robert Lee Brown
A great nostalgic read. "Seek and you will find..." Sounds like you had a great trip back in time, a visit with your father and symbols of a lot of memories. These are the things that influence our directions and future experiences. I enjoyed the read. Your friend, Bob
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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A great nostalgic read. "Seek and you will find..." Sounds like you had a great trip back in time, a visit with your father and symbols of a lot of memories. These are the things that influence our directions and future experiences. I enjoyed the read. Your friend, Bob
Comment Written 28-May-2013
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Bless you, Bob - I'm so glad you enjoyed this one. I do miss him, still.
You might also (I hope) enjoy "Too Many Birds Singing" in the prose section - only 2000 words but rather a fun (and a little wicked) short story - giving reviewing $$ at the moment!
:)Sharyn
Comment from JM daSilva
But people do live on in our memories and the objects they loved. I can't see a car and certain things without remembering people who passed away. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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But people do live on in our memories and the objects they loved. I can't see a car and certain things without remembering people who passed away. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 28-May-2013
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Thx Joe!
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welcome.
Comment from Brumar97
Beautiful, picturesque words. Relaxing, content, peaceful images. you avoid the sorrow of death by focusing on the joy of sharing life. Thank you for sharing:)
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Beautiful, picturesque words. Relaxing, content, peaceful images. you avoid the sorrow of death by focusing on the joy of sharing life. Thank you for sharing:)
Comment Written 28-May-2013
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Bless you my dear - how lovely to have your magic six on this one! thank you so much for sharing and enjoying this piece.
:)Sharyn
Comment from Hollyhock
I think very much a prose-poem, rather than free verse.
Very descriptive and full of telling phrases and emotion.
Always the gentle touch of amusement, "There... is... my Dad//Not literally of course...."
Always th real depth of emotion-"with only the windsong..../and my dad for company. Celebration enough"
Wonderful ending, leaving the page open, as it were, for whatever comes next.
Nostalgic, at times almost wistful with memories but never maudlin, a lovely, lovely read.
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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I think very much a prose-poem, rather than free verse.
Very descriptive and full of telling phrases and emotion.
Always the gentle touch of amusement, "There... is... my Dad//Not literally of course...."
Always th real depth of emotion-"with only the windsong..../and my dad for company. Celebration enough"
Wonderful ending, leaving the page open, as it were, for whatever comes next.
Nostalgic, at times almost wistful with memories but never maudlin, a lovely, lovely read.
Comment Written 28-May-2013
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Yes, I'd agree much more a 'prose poem' than free verse, Andrea - have you read any of Billy Elliot?? VERY interesting style. And bravo for me as I just HATE "maudlin" - thank you for noticing!
Blessings,
Sharyn
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Memories are good, Sharyn, they are totally ours, no one can take them, we own them. I have found over the years my memories have been somewhat embellished though, LOL, but they are still mine. I love the descriptive imagery of all your 'dad' memories, wonderful. Now my father has moved on, I seem to be remembering more and more of the things we did together. A lovely poem and such a delight to read! xsx Sandra.
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Memories are good, Sharyn, they are totally ours, no one can take them, we own them. I have found over the years my memories have been somewhat embellished though, LOL, but they are still mine. I love the descriptive imagery of all your 'dad' memories, wonderful. Now my father has moved on, I seem to be remembering more and more of the things we did together. A lovely poem and such a delight to read! xsx Sandra.
Comment Written 28-May-2013
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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It's in the embellishment that poetry lies, I think Sandra, right? Blessings, as always - I always enjoy your insight.
Sharyn
Comment from Opal H.
What a lovely poem about old memories with loved ones! So many little things that may of may not have any significance otherwise can have a whole new meaning to us later on.
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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What a lovely poem about old memories with loved ones! So many little things that may of may not have any significance otherwise can have a whole new meaning to us later on.
Comment Written 28-May-2013
reply by the author on 28-May-2013
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Right on, Opal! :)S