Reviews from

My Life in words

Viewing comments for Chapter 117 "My Daughter."
All of my poems of release.

7 total reviews 
Comment from Maureen's Pen
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Congrats to your daughter and her fiance. Much happiness and love sent through virtual FanStory:)

Great write, well done, lovely picture of them!
Happy Holidays
Maureen

 Comment Written 10-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    Aww thank you Maureen it means a lot. They are a lovely wee couple. :) Jaq xx Happy Holidays to you too and I hope you are keeping well xx
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
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I also wish your daughter well and hope she and her partner are very happy through there marriage well done on this write my friend a very creative way to express your happiness well done regards Jill

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    Thank you so much Jill for your lovely words. :) Jaq xx
Comment from Spike the second
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Hi Jaq

I hope they have a great wedding and a very long happy life together. I bet you will miss her! Unless the scenario is like the Royle Family on TV and they are around nearly everyday. I just hope she can cook more than Dairylea on Toast LOL.

Super poem my friend and your pride echoes throughout.

Blessings

Spike

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    Thanks so much Spike and yes she can cook a mean chicken lasagne and pasta dishes. Actually she does really well with her cooking. I do love her lots, her intended is in the RAF so they will move away at some point. House to myself for the first time ever, woo hoo ;). It will take a bit of getting used to. :) Jaq xx
Comment from Eliza M
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A succinct, but very moving little piece Jaq that truly expresses a lot of emotion in its short few lines. I like the alliteration in 'gorgeous girl' as this subtly emphasises how beautiful and precious she is to you, as does your use of the 'a' words , with 'awe' admiration' and 'affection'.
If I might mention that I find the use of 'someone's' a little impersonal in this context, as you quite obviously approve of your future son-in-law. Perhaps-

'off to be a loving wife'
'soon to be happy, as a wife'
'joining in love as husband and wife'

Just suggestions sweetie, hope you understand what I am trying to get at.

What a lovely couple they make. You must be so proud. Liz.


 Comment Written 08-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    Hi Liz I do indeed love my soon to be son in law. The vino has a lot to answer for...LOL. Thank you so much when I read it this morning I thought the same xx
reply by Eliza M on 08-Dec-2012
    LOL! you and me both!!!x
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    LOL, that's when we should pick up the phone or skype each other hahahaha. Can you imagine the nonsense that would be spoken? ;-) Jaq xx
reply by Eliza M on 08-Dec-2012
    PS- you must think I've lost the plot with my suggestions, I've only just realized it's a nonet!DOH! - didn't consider the syllable count!!! Your new adjustment reads well!x
reply by Eliza M on 08-Dec-2012
    Yes we must get chatting. Had so much going on and what with the 'black clouds' haven't been up to chatting recently. We will do it soon I promise.x
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    Never feel rushed Liz, I'm not going anywhere. Just when you feel up to it. :) Jaq x
Comment from Earl of Oxford
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Your daughter and her fiance are a very good-looking and happy couple, Jaq.

Excellent expression of your pride and happiness for your daughter.

My only nit-pick is 'someone's', as I reckon this sounds impersonal and maybe even bitchy, though I realise this is certainly not your intention.

Maybe something like:

she leaves me now
to become
a loved
wife

Just a quick idea, and I understand if you don't agree.

Best wishes, Ray

 Comment Written 08-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    I know Ray the demon wine last night befuddled my thought processes. I will redo that. Thanks so much for your great review. Xx
Comment from Deorre Leonard
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I like this creative and expressive poem about the wedding of your lovely daughter. You did a good job with this. Thanks for sharing this special time with us....

 Comment Written 07-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    Thank you so much for your lovely review xx
Comment from Gungalo
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Ahhh this makes me feel the same as you girl. Amazing how fast they grow up isn't it? Have no fears whatsoever that she will be just fine.

 Comment Written 07-Dec-2012

reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
    Thank you so much girlie, means a lot xx
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2012
    Do you have a girlie this age?? lol xx
reply by Gungalo on 07-Dec-2012
    No I don't girl.
reply by Gungalo on 07-Dec-2012
    Smile.
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2012
    I would guess you are a lot younger than me anyway :) Jaq xx
reply by Gungalo on 08-Dec-2012
    Smile.