Dirty Hands
A poem about my Dad's hands17 total reviews
Comment from venika
A very touchy poem. You have expressed your feelings very well in this poem.It shows how much you loved him and miss him now.
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
  |
A very touchy poem. You have expressed your feelings very well in this poem.It shows how much you loved him and miss him now.
Comment Written 23-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you venika for your gracious comments and review.
Comment from reconciled
Hello Jo wow...what a poem Yea, your Dad is happy today. Wonderful tribute to your mentor mender and father. Exceptional write love Michael
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
|
Hello Jo wow...what a poem Yea, your Dad is happy today. Wonderful tribute to your mentor mender and father. Exceptional write love Michael
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you Michael. Your kind review of my poem delights me. I am glad you liked it. It means a lot to me.
-
my pleasure...
Comment from ennahanid
This is a wonderful tribute to your Father and I feel very honored to have read it this evening. Thought you also found the perfect picture choice for your words. I am sorry for your loss and very moved by your tribute...Dinah
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
|
This is a wonderful tribute to your Father and I feel very honored to have read it this evening. Thought you also found the perfect picture choice for your words. I am sorry for your loss and very moved by your tribute...Dinah
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you Dinah. The poem means a lot to me. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from ameen786
Hello friend, so sorry for your loss; I thank you for sharing this heart warming tribute to your father; your love/affection for him is pouring in poignant verses in excellent rhyming, the last line is dynamite, take care my friend.
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
|
Hello friend, so sorry for your loss; I thank you for sharing this heart warming tribute to your father; your love/affection for him is pouring in poignant verses in excellent rhyming, the last line is dynamite, take care my friend.
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you ameen for your kind comments and review. The poem means a lot to me.
Comment from Tawnyowl
This is a competent poem about your Dad and shows the affection you held him in. You say you felt shame on his passing, I think we all feel like that about the death of a loved one, we feel we did not show enough love for them when they were alive mainly because we could not see they would not always be with us. Basically we took them for granted. I certainly did my Dad, and was shocked the day he died. Nice remembrance of your Dad, it is heartwarming and heartfelt !
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
|
This is a competent poem about your Dad and shows the affection you held him in. You say you felt shame on his passing, I think we all feel like that about the death of a loved one, we feel we did not show enough love for them when they were alive mainly because we could not see they would not always be with us. Basically we took them for granted. I certainly did my Dad, and was shocked the day he died. Nice remembrance of your Dad, it is heartwarming and heartfelt !
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you so much for reading my poem for my dad. It meant a lot to me to get the words on paper. It's the first time I have written about my shame. I know most teenagers go through this period but I had never looked it straight in the face and admitted it before. I'm glad I did, another burden lifted off.
Healing continues (my Dad has been gone now 10 years).
Comment from adewpearl
strong use of alternate-line rhyming
My dad was a steamfitter - I think our dads must have had very similar hands :-)
good alliteration in saw as his soul was set
and in friends and family
This poem really speaks to me. Many of us were raised in great homes by men who toiled with their hands :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
|
strong use of alternate-line rhyming
My dad was a steamfitter - I think our dads must have had very similar hands :-)
good alliteration in saw as his soul was set
and in friends and family
This poem really speaks to me. Many of us were raised in great homes by men who toiled with their hands :-) Brooke
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you Brooke. I'm always delighted when you review my work. I respect your work so much. This poem is from my heart and means a lot to me.
Comment from Bojenn
I don't know if this keeps the right iambic pentameter or any of those definitions but I can say ii feel your love for him, your appreciation, and the teenage embarressement that most recognize as their own feelings. Ignorant youth.
Your dad sounds like a great man the way your poem explains. A real man's man and you have a lot to be proud of.
Thank you for exposing your pain to th readers. And thanks for sharing such great memories.
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
 |
I don't know if this keeps the right iambic pentameter or any of those definitions but I can say ii feel your love for him, your appreciation, and the teenage embarressement that most recognize as their own feelings. Ignorant youth.
Your dad sounds like a great man the way your poem explains. A real man's man and you have a lot to be proud of.
Thank you for exposing your pain to th readers. And thanks for sharing such great memories.
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 23-May-2012
-
Thank you Bojenn for the great review and the six stars. You are so right...this poem is from my very soul and heart. It means a lot to me. My dad has been gone 10 years and I have never written or even spoken about ever being ashamed of him. I understand how teenagers can be but I had never admitted it to myself or others. Just writing this I felt like a burden was lifted. Healing continues...
-
:-)
Comment from guinea
This very loving. it is also powerful of your realization of what he did for you. I trully love it. It is well written and very thought provoking. Thank you.
reply by the author on 22-May-2012
|
This very loving. it is also powerful of your realization of what he did for you. I trully love it. It is well written and very thought provoking. Thank you.
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 22-May-2012
-
Thank you. I am really glad you read and liked my poem.
Comment from gifted$1
This is beautifully written. A very heartfelt tribute to the man who worked so hard for you to have the life you have. What a wonderful acknowledgment of the legacy he left. I would only ask you to consider one thing..and maybe this would throw off what you want for the poem..but in your last line..
His funeral was standing room only,
Friends and family came from far and wide
His family would miss him and feel lonely,
On that day, we could not hid our pride
...we cried.
I think if you separate the word..cried..from the rest of the lines..it has a bigger impact. Just a suggestion..I always figure the author is right. But, just a thought. Nice poem.
reply by the author on 22-May-2012
|
This is beautifully written. A very heartfelt tribute to the man who worked so hard for you to have the life you have. What a wonderful acknowledgment of the legacy he left. I would only ask you to consider one thing..and maybe this would throw off what you want for the poem..but in your last line..
His funeral was standing room only,
Friends and family came from far and wide
His family would miss him and feel lonely,
On that day, we could not hid our pride
...we cried.
I think if you separate the word..cried..from the rest of the lines..it has a bigger impact. Just a suggestion..I always figure the author is right. But, just a thought. Nice poem.
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 22-May-2012
-
Yes, I think you are right. I like the emphasis your idea gives ...we cried. Thank you for the suggestion and the kind review.
Comment from Val Crisson
This is such a touching tribute to your Dad, and he sounds like a remarkable man. I identified with your "shame," as I have mine own regarding my family. I am first generation, and I can remember cringing at their broken English. I missed the importance of their hard work, family devotion, and integrity. But the young make mistakes. The rhyming is very well done in this poem. Lovely
reply by the author on 22-May-2012
|
This is such a touching tribute to your Dad, and he sounds like a remarkable man. I identified with your "shame," as I have mine own regarding my family. I am first generation, and I can remember cringing at their broken English. I missed the importance of their hard work, family devotion, and integrity. But the young make mistakes. The rhyming is very well done in this poem. Lovely
Comment Written 22-May-2012
reply by the author on 22-May-2012
-
Thank you Val for the comments and a piece of your own life. Yes, I hate to admit it now but there was a time when I was so ashmaed of my Dad. I was a stupid kid...what did I know. Once, I grew up and had kids of my own...I felt so different. Thank you for the kind review.