Unstoppable
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Monster"I am sick and tired of everyone bullying.
7 total reviews
Comment from Deorre Leonard
I want to start by saying I just love your name... my favorite part is Im holding the sins of ones before, nothing left for me to give,can't I just fit in. Well done. Deorre
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2012
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I want to start by saying I just love your name... my favorite part is Im holding the sins of ones before, nothing left for me to give,can't I just fit in. Well done. Deorre
Comment Written 24-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2012
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thank you
Comment from l.raven
This is a bit depressing. I know we all want to fit in. And we all have ghosts in our closet's. Very well written. Very well said.
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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This is a bit depressing. I know we all want to fit in. And we all have ghosts in our closet's. Very well written. Very well said.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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Thanks for the kind reveiw
Comment from purrfect tale
I don't know the rules of poetry to review on that score, but this poem brought out emotions os despair and loneliness. It was very dark.
The flaws of mankin(d) impressed on my skin
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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I don't know the rules of poetry to review on that score, but this poem brought out emotions os despair and loneliness. It was very dark.
The flaws of mankin(d) impressed on my skin
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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Thans what do you meanby the last line...
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I thought it was a typo. There is no such word as "mankin" and from the poem, I thought you meant "mankind".
Comment from mumsyone
Everyone has a desire to fit in somewhere in the world. I'm not sure I understand every line of your poem and am guessing at some of them.
No hero coming forth to tell me other wise (otherwise)
I am nothing more than an ill breed (bred) human
The flaws of mankin (mankind) impressed on my skin
Caring (Carrying?) more scars than I can account for
Nothing left for me to give can't I just fit I'm (in)
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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Everyone has a desire to fit in somewhere in the world. I'm not sure I understand every line of your poem and am guessing at some of them.
No hero coming forth to tell me other wise (otherwise)
I am nothing more than an ill breed (bred) human
The flaws of mankin (mankind) impressed on my skin
Caring (Carrying?) more scars than I can account for
Nothing left for me to give can't I just fit I'm (in)
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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Corrections made would you consider an upgrade on the stars?
Comment from rchitwood
Many people most likely feel this way and want to fit in. I feel for the young teens in school I have seen many who feel this way. Your poem has strong emotions and tell Astor of pain. Blessings Rita
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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Many people most likely feel this way and want to fit in. I feel for the young teens in school I have seen many who feel this way. Your poem has strong emotions and tell Astor of pain. Blessings Rita
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2012
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Thank you I do try
Comment from c_lucas
A very well written, negative view of one's being. It has a smooth flow of words, making of a gruesome read. There is very good imagery.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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A very well written, negative view of one's being. It has a smooth flow of words, making of a gruesome read. There is very good imagery.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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thank you I try my best
Comment from krazykats2011
I love the message that this poem carries, but I don't know if these were intentional on your part and if so, why? "Now hero coming..." was it supposed to be "no hero coming", or "inbreed human.." - sh/be inbread? or "caring more scars.." - sh/be carrying? Just curious. It would help me to make more sense of it than I do now. Thanks for sharing it with us. Kathie
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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I love the message that this poem carries, but I don't know if these were intentional on your part and if so, why? "Now hero coming..." was it supposed to be "no hero coming", or "inbreed human.." - sh/be inbread? or "caring more scars.." - sh/be carrying? Just curious. It would help me to make more sense of it than I do now. Thanks for sharing it with us. Kathie
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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I dont know I was kinda of think of Draco Malfoy from harry Potter
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I will forever remain clueless then - I've seen none of those. lol