CSP: A Collection of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 66 "I Soldier On"A collection of poetry
35 total reviews
Comment from jack silver
this one was written really well. i didn't see anything that needed to be worked on and i look forward to reading more. i also thought the picture went really well with the poem. and the poem was also gave a really good visual picture of what was going on.
from
jack
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this one was written really well. i didn't see anything that needed to be worked on and i look forward to reading more. i also thought the picture went really well with the poem. and the poem was also gave a really good visual picture of what was going on.
from
jack
Comment Written 16-Feb-2009
Comment from Brandenpaul
Well written story of the commitment a soldier makes. I thought it flowed very easily and was fun to read. Rhymers seem to almost always be fun to read. I didn't see any mistakes and thought you did a great job.
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Well written story of the commitment a soldier makes. I thought it flowed very easily and was fun to read. Rhymers seem to almost always be fun to read. I didn't see any mistakes and thought you did a great job.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from grassroots08
Nicely told as if you were right on the battle front and facing a real enemy. It is really him against you, and the wiser of the two of you will survive. Cheers, Don
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Nicely told as if you were right on the battle front and facing a real enemy. It is really him against you, and the wiser of the two of you will survive. Cheers, Don
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from Karen B.
I like how you've shown the battlefield from the view of an individual soldier. "There is pain beneath this dirt" is such a poignant line. Well done! Karen
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I like how you've shown the battlefield from the view of an individual soldier. "There is pain beneath this dirt" is such a poignant line. Well done! Karen
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from Nescher Pyscher
I'm torn between liking the poem and wanting to point out what I identify as discrepencies.
::Grinning::
It's good stuff. A good read and well-written.
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I'm torn between liking the poem and wanting to point out what I identify as discrepencies.
::Grinning::
It's good stuff. A good read and well-written.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from Arkine
This is well done, it gives you a good sense of what this soldier is looking at, the ground, the rest of the battle field and behind him are men waiting for him to tell them that it's clear. Touching and disturbing. Great job!
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This is well done, it gives you a good sense of what this soldier is looking at, the ground, the rest of the battle field and behind him are men waiting for him to tell them that it's clear. Touching and disturbing. Great job!
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
Comment from dportwood
Written like a true soldier.
They're all good, but I like the 4th stanza best.
Great rhyme and meter in this quatrain.
Very nicely done.
Duane
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Written like a true soldier.
They're all good, but I like the 4th stanza best.
Great rhyme and meter in this quatrain.
Very nicely done.
Duane
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
Comment from mmichelle97219
There is a fantastic cadence to this poem. It reads in its own rhythm that carries the reader through the poem. Excellent post.
Michelle
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There is a fantastic cadence to this poem. It reads in its own rhythm that carries the reader through the poem. Excellent post.
Michelle
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
Comment from rhymelord
Poetry - simple words, fantastic rhyme, great iambic tetrametre and a story well told. However, for the first time, in your work, I am unable to follow the meaning of the last two lines.
Regards
Reg
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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Poetry - simple words, fantastic rhyme, great iambic tetrametre and a story well told. However, for the first time, in your work, I am unable to follow the meaning of the last two lines.
Regards
Reg
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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As a metaphor on life, I've used the soldier and his relentlessness and caution to get through.
A soldier relies heavily on his trusty boots and compass. Lost without them. He's putting his faith in both to have victory. Does that help out?
I thank you for your compliments. I do love to get those meters right!!
And thank you for your great review.
Sue
Comment from Curt Mongold
Hey Cuz!
What a nice write! I love the flow of this, it just oozes off the page. Fantastic word use for balance to. They combine to give just the right touch to this piece.
I love it!
Sincerely,
Curt
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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Hey Cuz!
What a nice write! I love the flow of this, it just oozes off the page. Fantastic word use for balance to. They combine to give just the right touch to this piece.
I love it!
Sincerely,
Curt
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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Cuz, so glad you liked this one. I'll take "oozes" and "fantastic"! HA!! Thanks for those compliments and your great review. Your cuz