Detour
Viewing comments for Chapter 37 "Powder Keg"Two very real women in not so real situation.
28 total reviews
Comment from Julie Helms
I feel late to the party on this one but will see about catching up. I love the humor throughout this. I love that you had no idea who 'the man' was and it is The Tom ....just brilliant!
A couple suggestions:
Somewhere from the room I hear a voice whisper, "She's wearing the same dress."
(Maybe because I am late to the party, I didn't get this at first...so maybe not an issue...but I read this in the sense of "She's wearing the same dress...again", not "She's wearing the same dress as Rachelle." I didn't pick up on the difference for a few more paragraphs. One thought: "They are both wearing the same dress.")
"She's a bout to get the horns of the goat,"
(about)
This is a lot of fun and a fun project!
Julie
:-)
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I feel late to the party on this one but will see about catching up. I love the humor throughout this. I love that you had no idea who 'the man' was and it is The Tom ....just brilliant!
A couple suggestions:
Somewhere from the room I hear a voice whisper, "She's wearing the same dress."
(Maybe because I am late to the party, I didn't get this at first...so maybe not an issue...but I read this in the sense of "She's wearing the same dress...again", not "She's wearing the same dress as Rachelle." I didn't pick up on the difference for a few more paragraphs. One thought: "They are both wearing the same dress.")
"She's a bout to get the horns of the goat,"
(about)
This is a lot of fun and a fun project!
Julie
:-)
Comment Written 29-Oct-2024
Comment from pome lover
well, my first thought, or rather one of them, is has Tom seen this? I wonder what his reaction to the situation is? and where is what's her name, Jane's friend? next thought, no, honestly, this one was first, were the guests picked for having the most posts? I was surprised to see Roy there in yall's fun group of revelers. Tom sure sounded royally pissed, if you'll pardon my french. I wonder if he'll deduct points for the food throwers? ha! And Dolly, who'd athunk? good for her.
Good, crazy developments at the convention. I would not have imagined this scenario. The more I think about it, I have to say I feel sorry for Tom.
Yall really have created a most unlikable villain in Janiekins. You and Rachelle have delighted in creating mayhem. I look forward to what happens next.
Katharine
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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well, my first thought, or rather one of them, is has Tom seen this? I wonder what his reaction to the situation is? and where is what's her name, Jane's friend? next thought, no, honestly, this one was first, were the guests picked for having the most posts? I was surprised to see Roy there in yall's fun group of revelers. Tom sure sounded royally pissed, if you'll pardon my french. I wonder if he'll deduct points for the food throwers? ha! And Dolly, who'd athunk? good for her.
Good, crazy developments at the convention. I would not have imagined this scenario. The more I think about it, I have to say I feel sorry for Tom.
Yall really have created a most unlikable villain in Janiekins. You and Rachelle have delighted in creating mayhem. I look forward to what happens next.
Katharine
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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I sure hope you'll post your version. I want everyone to add their 2 cents worth. Thank you for this wonderful review and the extra star. Gretchen
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I did. :)
Comment from Neonewman
Stellar performance, Gretchen! Between yours and Rachelle's, my stomach aches from laughter. I knew Rachelle wasn't going to take that crap from Jane! This was the perfect ending.
God bless,
Steve
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Stellar performance, Gretchen! Between yours and Rachelle's, my stomach aches from laughter. I knew Rachelle wasn't going to take that crap from Jane! This was the perfect ending.
God bless,
Steve
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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One more chapter then it's finished. Thank you so much. I hope you'll join in the fun and post a chapter of the convention. Thank you so much for this awesome review and the extra star. Gretchen
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One more chapter! That's exciting. Can I view the other participants' work as well?
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I believe so. Probably go to the book and look fir chapter 38. There are about 9entrues so far. All great!
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LOL! Okay.
Comment from patcelaw
This is very well written and I enjoyed very much listening to it. Your story flows very well when it is read aloud. What makes for a good story being read aloud is the punctuation is very good and your sentence structure is exquisite. Have a lovely day and may God bless you. Also have a lovely week. Patricia.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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This is very well written and I enjoyed very much listening to it. Your story flows very well when it is read aloud. What makes for a good story being read aloud is the punctuation is very good and your sentence structure is exquisite. Have a lovely day and may God bless you. Also have a lovely week. Patricia.
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Thank you so much, Patricia. I'm so happy you enjoyed this. Gretchen
Comment from Jessica Wheeler
Hahaha! I absolutely love where you took this. There are so many genius little details that I found a little too relatable. The crawling under the table, the swigging of the wine, the asking Tom about more sixes in the middle of chaos- I can't get enough! You two have created something very special, and I have truly enjoyed every stop along this adventure.
Xo
Jess
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Hahaha! I absolutely love where you took this. There are so many genius little details that I found a little too relatable. The crawling under the table, the swigging of the wine, the asking Tom about more sixes in the middle of chaos- I can't get enough! You two have created something very special, and I have truly enjoyed every stop along this adventure.
Xo
Jess
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Thank you, Jessica. I don't think I've ever had so much fun writing about an imaginary trip. Hope you will join in if you already haven't. Thank you so much for the wonderful review and the extra star. Gretchen
Comment from Carol Clark2
This is a fun chapter! I like that the two of you have opened this book to other FS writers. Great idea including Tom in the story. I love his reaction to the food fight. Good job on the book. Carol
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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This is a fun chapter! I like that the two of you have opened this book to other FS writers. Great idea including Tom in the story. I love his reaction to the food fight. Good job on the book. Carol
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Thank you so much. I'm so glad others are having fun with this. Hope you will add a chapter as well. Gretchen
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Thanks for the invitation. I've read a number of the added chapters, and they're lots of fun. Carol
Comment from Sanku
My God what a riot , And a perfect concluding episode to a thrilling though sometimes irritating experience ,It proves that sometimes adults can behave like kids..
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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My God what a riot , And a perfect concluding episode to a thrilling though sometimes irritating experience ,It proves that sometimes adults can behave like kids..
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Guilty. My inner twelve year old usually shows up in distressing times. Thank you so much for this. Please consider adding a chapter. Gretchen
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
A food fight? Funny but, I thought that we adults were above such things. Who am I kidding? I would have throw the watermelon chunks her way, nice and sloppy. Have a good week and nice Halloween. Karen
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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A food fight? Funny but, I thought that we adults were above such things. Who am I kidding? I would have throw the watermelon chunks her way, nice and sloppy. Have a good week and nice Halloween. Karen
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Thank you, Karen. Please add your own chapter. So far, they've been different and hilarious. Gretchen
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Sorry, no can do. I am knee deep in writing something gruesome. I must stay in the kill zone. Karen
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I was wondering if you were going to describe the fashion show again from your perspective, but I'm delighted to see that you're the one addressing the elephant in the room:-) And that must be where the chapter gets the name, Powder Keg.
Tom thought writers were classy? LOL! We're as dramatic as they come. I'm just wondering how Jane's face and body made out in the food fight. Can't wait to find out!
No extra sixes? Thanks for trying, Gretchen.
I enjoyed your part of the story more than the fashion show, but don't tell Allen 'cause she'll dump my head in a bowl of potato salad!
xo
Pam
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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I was wondering if you were going to describe the fashion show again from your perspective, but I'm delighted to see that you're the one addressing the elephant in the room:-) And that must be where the chapter gets the name, Powder Keg.
Tom thought writers were classy? LOL! We're as dramatic as they come. I'm just wondering how Jane's face and body made out in the food fight. Can't wait to find out!
No extra sixes? Thanks for trying, Gretchen.
I enjoyed your part of the story more than the fashion show, but don't tell Allen 'cause she'll dump my head in a bowl of potato salad!
xo
Pam
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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While Rachelle was on the runway, your gal right here was in the trenches. (With wine). Thank you so much. Please add your own take on this. I thank you for the stars. Gretchen
Comment from royowen
I think you've done very well, I feel a bit exhausted after my long 18 hour fight from Australia, so a food fight wakes me up somewhat, it looks like I might be going to bed pretty early, an excellent post Gretchen, it looks like fun, beautifully written, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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I think you've done very well, I feel a bit exhausted after my long 18 hour fight from Australia, so a food fight wakes me up somewhat, it looks like I might be going to bed pretty early, an excellent post Gretchen, it looks like fun, beautifully written, blessings Roy
Comment Written 28-Oct-2024
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2024
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Thank you so much, Roy. Thank you for the prayer. Please consider writing a chapter with your own version. Gretchen
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Perhaps