My Father - The Artist
A new painting every evening ... for me!31 total reviews
Comment from Mintybee
This is a beautiful picture, and a beautiful poem. I did not like how the perfect rhyme scheme stumbled right at the end, but I liked the rest of it. The detail and the movement were lovely.
Mintybee
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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This is a beautiful picture, and a beautiful poem. I did not like how the perfect rhyme scheme stumbled right at the end, but I liked the rest of it. The detail and the movement were lovely.
Mintybee
Comment Written 13-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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Thank you Mintybee, for reading and reviewing. Always appreciated. In Australia, "awe" and "shore" rhyme perfectly, so I guess it's a question of different English accents. I'm glad you liked the rest of it.
Wendy
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Really? They rhyme with your accent? That's too funny. They don't even have assonance with mine. This is why poetry is often better when you hear it than read it, I suppose. :)
Comment from Sally Law
Our Heavenly Father is most definitely, the best artist and we all get an original every day! Beautifully done and illustrated poem of the art of God. Sending you my nest today as always and my good wishes in the contest.
Sal Xoxo
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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Our Heavenly Father is most definitely, the best artist and we all get an original every day! Beautifully done and illustrated poem of the art of God. Sending you my nest today as always and my good wishes in the contest.
Sal Xoxo
Comment Written 13-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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Thank you very much Sally, for your lovely review. Much appreciated.
Wendy
Comment from Jodi Ann Anderson
Wow, what a beautiful poem to go with the beautiful picture! This poem has a nice flow and is so true. We never know what colors we will see on any given day, but it shows God's love to us in this way. Nice one!
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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Wow, what a beautiful poem to go with the beautiful picture! This poem has a nice flow and is so true. We never know what colors we will see on any given day, but it shows God's love to us in this way. Nice one!
Comment Written 13-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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Thank you for the lovely review, Jodi. Your kind words are greatly appreciated.
Wendy
Comment from Jim Wile
This is such a beautiful poem about observing nature at the end of the day. The imagery gave us a very clear picture of the awe and appreciation this inspires in you, which helps bolster your faith in the creator of something so beautiful.
It rhymed well, but there was no consistent meter to make it flow as beautifully as the theme. With the first line, I thought it would be iambic pentameter. But then we encounter generally four feet per line with many variations of feet including amphibrach (dit-DA-dit) mixed in with iambs (dit-DA), trochees (DA-dit), anapests (dit-dit-DA), and dactyls (DA-dit-dit) in a jumble. It's impossible to read or recite with any kind of cadence.
Perhaps that doesn't matter to you, as it doesn't to many who write rhyming poetry versus free-verse, but if you're interested in improving this aspect of your poetry, I could help you with this and teach you a few things. Just let me know if that's something you wish to pursue.
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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This is such a beautiful poem about observing nature at the end of the day. The imagery gave us a very clear picture of the awe and appreciation this inspires in you, which helps bolster your faith in the creator of something so beautiful.
It rhymed well, but there was no consistent meter to make it flow as beautifully as the theme. With the first line, I thought it would be iambic pentameter. But then we encounter generally four feet per line with many variations of feet including amphibrach (dit-DA-dit) mixed in with iambs (dit-DA), trochees (DA-dit), anapests (dit-dit-DA), and dactyls (DA-dit-dit) in a jumble. It's impossible to read or recite with any kind of cadence.
Perhaps that doesn't matter to you, as it doesn't to many who write rhyming poetry versus free-verse, but if you're interested in improving this aspect of your poetry, I could help you with this and teach you a few things. Just let me know if that's something you wish to pursue.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2024
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Thank you very much, Jim. Your review is very kind and respectful. I probably won?t accept your kind offer. I write very little poetry now, and tend to prefer what I call mixed meter (to excuse myself) as I have no knowledge or idea of meter and the various names. Never had a single lesson on how to write poetry at school. Sometimes people try to mould their thoughts into strange and different formats to highlight skill with metre but that then seems artificial to me. I tend to just let my thoughts flow, rearrange and tidy it up in a way pleasing to me, and that?s it. Not very professional at all. But I think my output of poetry is too small to worry about it. That?s my seventh for this year. I prefer short stories, and seem to have the knack there. Perhaps it?s a case of not being able to teach an old dog new tricks. Although Sunny is able ?oh well. Many thanks though. I do appreciate your offer.
Wendy
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That's perfectly fine, Wendy. May not be worth the effort if writing poetry is that occasional.
I fully agree with your statement: Sometimes people try to mould their thoughts into strange and different formats to highlight skill with metre but that then seems artificial to me.
Often wrong words are used or convoluted syntax to make something rhyme, which does make it seem artificial. That is one of the pitfalls of writing rhyming poetry with meter and why many choose not to. It can be quite difficult to make a poem sound natural with good rhyme and meter, but when you can manage to, the result is very gratifying. There are only a handful of poets on this site who do it consistently well.
Comment from nancyjam
Wow! Lovely picture. Yes, you were blessed to witness this beauty.
Your poem praises the beauty of nature and God's gifts to us.
Nicely crafted poem with beautiful imagery, rhyme and meter.
Good luck in the contest.
Nancy
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Wow! Lovely picture. Yes, you were blessed to witness this beauty.
Your poem praises the beauty of nature and God's gifts to us.
Nicely crafted poem with beautiful imagery, rhyme and meter.
Good luck in the contest.
Nancy
Comment Written 12-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Thank you so much Nancy. A lovely review - I am veryappreciative of it as well as of the good wishes.
Wendy
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, My Father the Artist, presented with three AABB-rhymed quatrains, sees the canvas as everything and God as that titular artist Who paints night and day to delight us. Nice.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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This poem, My Father the Artist, presented with three AABB-rhymed quatrains, sees the canvas as everything and God as that titular artist Who paints night and day to delight us. Nice.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Yes, He does create beautiful works in all creation. Thanks so much for a great review.
Wendy
Comment from gansach
What a beautiful photo you took! The colors are stunning. I love sunsets. Your words perfectly describe this gorgeous view and the breathtaking feeling one gets when they are lucky enough to witness it. Wonderful job!
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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What a beautiful photo you took! The colors are stunning. I love sunsets. Your words perfectly describe this gorgeous view and the breathtaking feeling one gets when they are lucky enough to witness it. Wonderful job!
Comment Written 12-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Thank you so much for this super review - much appreciated. Yes, a truly breathtaking sunset!
Wendy
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Your zen like poem is a perfect entry for the Faith Poetry Contest.
There's something very spiritual about beautiful nature places, like a tranquil lake. Your excellent word imagery takes us there. I get that feeling on the beach facing the massive sea, the majestic ocean is a way to feel close to God. It makes me feel small yet connected to a higher power....part of "all".
"My exultant heart overflows with awe." Beautifully expressed.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Your zen like poem is a perfect entry for the Faith Poetry Contest.
There's something very spiritual about beautiful nature places, like a tranquil lake. Your excellent word imagery takes us there. I get that feeling on the beach facing the massive sea, the majestic ocean is a way to feel close to God. It makes me feel small yet connected to a higher power....part of "all".
"My exultant heart overflows with awe." Beautifully expressed.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Thank you very much, Gypsy! Yes, nature, all of it, is beautiful and awe-inspiring, a joy to be able to see such beauty.
Wendy
Comment from Brenda Strauser
I enjoyed your poem. The picture is so pretty. God surely has given us such beautiful things. I am in awe too of his creation. Poem is written well. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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I enjoyed your poem. The picture is so pretty. God surely has given us such beautiful things. I am in awe too of his creation. Poem is written well. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Thank you so much for your lovely review, Brenda. i appreciate it, and your good wishes also.
Wendy
Comment from GWHARGIS
This was absolutely beautiful, Wendy. I felt God's peace by reading it. It's amazing how He will bless us and give us breathtaking treats like the one on your picture on a daily basis. Sometimes as we hurry through life, we miss them. Thank you for sharing this. Gretchen
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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This was absolutely beautiful, Wendy. I felt God's peace by reading it. It's amazing how He will bless us and give us breathtaking treats like the one on your picture on a daily basis. Sometimes as we hurry through life, we miss them. Thank you for sharing this. Gretchen
Comment Written 12-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2024
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Thank you very much, Gretchen! Such kind words, much appreciated. I am very grateful to receive the six beautiful stars too.
Yes, hurrying through life means we miss this peace, beauty, and tranquillity.
Wendy
Wendy