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Me. Her. Him

Viewing comments for Chapter 71 "Me. Her. Him - Chapter 71"
A hidden past, a devastating truth.

7 total reviews 
Comment from Lea Tonin1
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Uh, so now we have the money thief, which thinks perhaps it's a noble reason to do so, but really not a good reason for stealing ever. This william guy needs to go down! Another very well written chapter I see no Issues with grammar sentence structure Punctuation or subject matter. Another great Entry merry christmas!

 Comment Written 25-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 25-Dec-2023
    Thank you Lea.
Comment from Janis M.
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This was a very intense chapter with a lot of emotions. The dynamic between michelle and angela changing is flushed out well. This sort of things happens all the time and its easy for one friend to blind themeslves from the uncomfortable truth. The very opening of the chapter I have pointers coming from a medical perspective. When people regain consciousness, they typically gain sound back before sight and even before they can feel. A lot of sedatives effect the hippocampus and amygdala and can cause memory loss for sure. The most common one used is propofol which is what famously killed michael jackson. Sometimes a person can be "awake" and moving around without even realizing it. We call this "the lights are on, but nobody is home."

anyway, angela would also likely be pretty out of it for an hour or more even upon waking. She might not even realize that she is talking. Its a pretty trippy ride!

Of course it all depends on what sedative you have in mind! Your options are propofol, versed, and ativan.

I only spotted one typo. You wrote bear arms instead of bare arms.


 Comment Written 24-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 24-Dec-2023
    Thank you Janis and for the advice as well, I really appreciate it.
Comment from karenina
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Wow. I did not see this lesbian twist coming. Kudos for originality! This is an important chapter, answering many questions...

Still! William wants what. Exactly? Rebecca? Doesn't seem so!

And Caz? Truly dead and hidden or yet another thrilling twist?

Very good...

Hooked from the beginning and still guessing!

Karenina

 Comment Written 24-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 24-Dec-2023
    Thank you Karenina.
reply by karenina on 24-Dec-2023
    Welcome!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
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What a great chapter, Jacob! This is surely the best I've read from you and I've still got nothing more than a 5* to give. It ties up so many strands and all within this atmosphere of sheer terror and foreboding. There was of course always something rather strange and detached about Michelle and it now make sense that she had these feelings for Angela that she felt unable to express. Albeit she was determined to protect her interest from others. Small edit: para starting I can't bring myself, 5th line down - the(y')re not there; But as I say the words(,) memories flood back. I think it's worth checking punctuation, Jacob, because, when it's missing, it can alter the sense of the sentence. But, otherwise this is great. You've got the sinister, the duped and the deceiver here with their characters well delineated. And yet another cliff-hanger. How do you do this without your story sounding contrived? Clever! Debbie

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023
    Thank you Debbie.
Comment from Navada
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Oh dear. They're both in very big trouble now. Not only do they face great danger from William, but there is trouble between the two women now as well. Two little edits required in the same paragraph - they're instead of there and bare instead of bear. What will happen next?

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023
    Thank you.
Comment from BethShelby
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Well, it all makes sense now, but I still don't know what William want from them. I don't think he wants Rebecca. Maybe a shakdown for money? Angela doesn't have any? He didn't see to care anything about Caz. I was afraid Mechelle planned to kill him. This makes her gay, a thief and a murderer and a very underhanded. William has enough dirt on them he can pretty much get what he wants. The story has an excellent plot.

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023
    Thank you Beth.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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Oh my! I never expected all of this to come out. Caz falling was an accident, unless, Michelle drugged her in some way. I thought Caz told William she was pregnant. Maybe she didn't. But then again, does William want Rebecca? I am so into this story. I can't wait to see what's going to happen next.

 Comment Written 23-Dec-2023


reply by the author on 23-Dec-2023
    Thank you Barbara.