Me. Her. Him
Viewing comments for Chapter 55 "Me. Her. Him - Chapter 55"A hidden past, a devastating truth.
10 total reviews
Comment from Navada
I'm now understanding a little more about how Angela has arrived at the point I reached in the last installment I read. I think I need to go back and see if I can find what the information is that William possesses from Angela's past - that seems to be the instigation for all this.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2023
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I'm now understanding a little more about how Angela has arrived at the point I reached in the last installment I read. I think I need to go back and see if I can find what the information is that William possesses from Angela's past - that seems to be the instigation for all this.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from lyenochka
Things are getting more heated up and convoluted. The one thing that is not known to the reader is whether Angela and Michelle are really guilty with regard to Caz. Wonder why William suddenly resigned...
Suggestion:
I found it helpful to put things that the narrator is thinking but not saying aloud such as "Come on, pick up please pick up." in italics.
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2023
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Things are getting more heated up and convoluted. The one thing that is not known to the reader is whether Angela and Michelle are really guilty with regard to Caz. Wonder why William suddenly resigned...
Suggestion:
I found it helpful to put things that the narrator is thinking but not saying aloud such as "Come on, pick up please pick up." in italics.
Comment Written 16-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from karenina
It seems many paths are going to converge... each woman has their own aim with William. This has turned out to be a solid psychological thriller!
Karenina
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2023
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It seems many paths are going to converge... each woman has their own aim with William. This has turned out to be a solid psychological thriller!
Karenina
Comment Written 16-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2023
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Thank you Karenina.
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You bet!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I think Michelle is fuelling the fire here and it does not take much to get Angela all fired up. The William threat is looming up and I wonder what is going to happen here. You are still keeping us in suspense Jacob, a fine chapter, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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I think Michelle is fuelling the fire here and it does not take much to get Angela all fired up. The William threat is looming up and I wonder what is going to happen here. You are still keeping us in suspense Jacob, a fine chapter, love Dolly x
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you Dolly.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
This is all very conspiratorial and intriguing! Angela is definitely getting quite paranoid and Michelle is working overtime to help her friend in this situation. I'm still no nearer what happened in the past . But that's the mystery with which you continue to hold my interest! Well done, Jacob! Debbie
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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This is all very conspiratorial and intriguing! Angela is definitely getting quite paranoid and Michelle is working overtime to help her friend in this situation. I'm still no nearer what happened in the past . But that's the mystery with which you continue to hold my interest! Well done, Jacob! Debbie
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you Debbie.
Comment from Lea Tonin1
Yeah this guy William's gotta hit the road! Angela's getting the gears everywhere! How stressful would that be having to do All that goes through all have a problem at home and a problem at work. No good shitty place to be. Another great chapter Jacob! I see no issues with grammar esthetics, subject matter or sentence structure. Thank you've done a great job and it's a great entry. I hope your day is amazing!
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Yeah this guy William's gotta hit the road! Angela's getting the gears everywhere! How stressful would that be having to do All that goes through all have a problem at home and a problem at work. No good shitty place to be. Another great chapter Jacob! I see no issues with grammar esthetics, subject matter or sentence structure. Thank you've done a great job and it's a great entry. I hope your day is amazing!
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you Lea.
Comment from Gunner Lil
Fast moving chapter. An easy read with a nice pace and very good flow.
Good dialogue. Could use more tags. I said to replace I say.
Sensory description is good and adds to story.
Enjoyed reading this chapter.
Thank you!
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Fast moving chapter. An easy read with a nice pace and very good flow.
Good dialogue. Could use more tags. I said to replace I say.
Sensory description is good and adds to story.
Enjoyed reading this chapter.
Thank you!
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
If there's the possibility that William caused her accident, then Angela needs to tell somebody. I don't understand why she doesn't confide in anyone, unless she did something to Caz. This is a good story.
If the truth gets out there it'll destroy the life she's built as much as it'll destroy mine. (comma either after 'out' or 'there', but I would omit 'there' it's an extra word and not necessary)
'Okay, calm down Angela. (comma after 'down' you're addressing 'Angela')
have you had any more thoughts on what we're going to do about this?' I say. (I'd write, 'I ask.' to avoid redundantly using 'say')
In my head we're back in our apartment in London and sprawled out next to each other on the
sofa, (sprawled out beside each)
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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If there's the possibility that William caused her accident, then Angela needs to tell somebody. I don't understand why she doesn't confide in anyone, unless she did something to Caz. This is a good story.
If the truth gets out there it'll destroy the life she's built as much as it'll destroy mine. (comma either after 'out' or 'there', but I would omit 'there' it's an extra word and not necessary)
'Okay, calm down Angela. (comma after 'down' you're addressing 'Angela')
have you had any more thoughts on what we're going to do about this?' I say. (I'd write, 'I ask.' to avoid redundantly using 'say')
In my head we're back in our apartment in London and sprawled out next to each other on the
sofa, (sprawled out beside each)
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you Barbara.
Comment from patcelaw
A very well written chapter for your book. I enjoyed listening to it, and I wish you the very best with all of your writing. May you have a wonderful day, and a blessed and merry Christmas. Patricia.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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A very well written chapter for your book. I enjoyed listening to it, and I wish you the very best with all of your writing. May you have a wonderful day, and a blessed and merry Christmas. Patricia.
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from BethShelby
I very curious as to what kind of stuff Michele's friend is planning to get for her. Since I still have no idea what happened to Caz and why this thing with William is going to ruin both of their lives, you have me waiting for more of the story to come out.
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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I very curious as to what kind of stuff Michele's friend is planning to get for her. Since I still have no idea what happened to Caz and why this thing with William is going to ruin both of their lives, you have me waiting for more of the story to come out.
Comment Written 15-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 15-Dec-2023
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Thank you Beth.