Me. Her. Him
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Me. Her. Him - Chapter 39"A hidden past, a devastating truth.
7 total reviews
Comment from karenina
As is necessary, this is a chapter of "pacing" -- not really advancing the story a lot but assuring us Angela is still smitten with William and foreshadowing there will be some drama certainly by New Year's Eve...
One edit--
"She may have had an enough"
Karenina
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2023
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As is necessary, this is a chapter of "pacing" -- not really advancing the story a lot but assuring us Angela is still smitten with William and foreshadowing there will be some drama certainly by New Year's Eve...
One edit--
"She may have had an enough"
Karenina
Comment Written 07-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2023
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Thank you Karenina.
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Have a great holiday season!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Angela is clearly not going to be put off William too easily by Michelle. Her decision not to see her family at Christmas is probably linked to her attraction to him. Some great dialogue here, Jacob, all very realistic, particularly in relation to the mother's attempt to guilt trip her daughter. Small edit: You're going to have to (say her to?) sooner or later; she may have had (an?) enough and this party... Excellently written, building up to something now.. Thanks for sharing Debbie
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Angela is clearly not going to be put off William too easily by Michelle. Her decision not to see her family at Christmas is probably linked to her attraction to him. Some great dialogue here, Jacob, all very realistic, particularly in relation to the mother's attempt to guilt trip her daughter. Small edit: You're going to have to (say her to?) sooner or later; she may have had (an?) enough and this party... Excellently written, building up to something now.. Thanks for sharing Debbie
Comment Written 06-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Thank you Debbie.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This post is building up to be the end of these ladies life as they know it now, so I am guessing something is about to happen with Angela, William, and Caz. I can't wait to find out.
I will pop over to see (In dialogue, I believe it would be 'I'll')
If I do I'm sure I'll be on the phone to her for another half an hour. (comma after 'do')
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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This post is building up to be the end of these ladies life as they know it now, so I am guessing something is about to happen with Angela, William, and Caz. I can't wait to find out.
I will pop over to see (In dialogue, I believe it would be 'I'll')
If I do I'm sure I'll be on the phone to her for another half an hour. (comma after 'do')
Comment Written 06-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Thank you Barbara.
Comment from BethShelby
Moms always use every argument at their disposal to get the kids home for Christmas. They don't even realize the kids might see it as manipulation. Hayley does see William coming to New Year as a problem but Michelle likely would. If she decides to make good on the threat to Angela the other two girls would have to leave as well. Nicely written chapter.
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Moms always use every argument at their disposal to get the kids home for Christmas. They don't even realize the kids might see it as manipulation. Hayley does see William coming to New Year as a problem but Michelle likely would. If she decides to make good on the threat to Angela the other two girls would have to leave as well. Nicely written chapter.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Thank you Beth.
Comment from BethShelby
Moms always use every argument at their disposal to get the kids home for Christmas. They don't even realize the kids might see it as manipulation. Hayley does see William coming to New Year as a problem but Michelle likely would. If she decides to make good on the threat to Angela the other two girls would have to leave as well. Nicely written chapter.
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Moms always use every argument at their disposal to get the kids home for Christmas. They don't even realize the kids might see it as manipulation. Hayley does see William coming to New Year as a problem but Michelle likely would. If she decides to make good on the threat to Angela the other two girls would have to leave as well. Nicely written chapter.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Thank you Beth.
Comment from Lea Tonin1
Good morning, Jacob, you're a very prolific writer. Busy fellow for sure, it's obviously your calling! Definitely have an interesting story going here just a couple issues with Grammar and punctuation one i've noted below. This in no way takes away from the interesting story that you have going. Just minor quirks along the way.
Ninth paragraph down where she's talking to her mom and the line goes. Something like you're gonna have to say to her when you're coming or not. I think that line needs to be refreshed. Also comma should be in there as well.
A great submission as always. Your story is entertaining and fun to read. I hope you have a great day!
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Good morning, Jacob, you're a very prolific writer. Busy fellow for sure, it's obviously your calling! Definitely have an interesting story going here just a couple issues with Grammar and punctuation one i've noted below. This in no way takes away from the interesting story that you have going. Just minor quirks along the way.
Ninth paragraph down where she's talking to her mom and the line goes. Something like you're gonna have to say to her when you're coming or not. I think that line needs to be refreshed. Also comma should be in there as well.
A great submission as always. Your story is entertaining and fun to read. I hope you have a great day!
Comment Written 06-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Thank you Lea.
Comment from patcelaw
This again is a very well written chapter, and I enjoyed listening to it. It moves along well, and the characters seem to be so interesting. I wish you the very best with all of your writing and with your book. Patricia.
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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This again is a very well written chapter, and I enjoyed listening to it. It moves along well, and the characters seem to be so interesting. I wish you the very best with all of your writing and with your book. Patricia.
Comment Written 06-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2023
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Thank you Patricia.