Reviews from

Me. Her. Him

Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Me. Her. Him - Chapter Nineteen"
A hidden past, a devastating truth.

8 total reviews 
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
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You are doing a good job with this. I am not sure why Angela says she can't get William's address as she has already seen his CV. Is she sure she can trust Michelle as they seem not to have been in touch for a long time? a hint of doubt might be a good idea. I am not sure what "supplies" Michelle needs for dealing with William, but be sure you have some things. I look forward to reading your next chapter. Be sure you are reading chapters from other writer's books. Some are good, some are very good, and some are examples of what you don't want to do. I know I've learned a lot from other novel writers on this site.

 Comment Written 24-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
    Thank you, I?m pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
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Jesus, did this woman ever have a spine? You wrote this well, but she is such an annoying Character. Happy Turkey Day, Happy Turkey Day, Happy Turkey Day, Happy Turkey Day. Karen

 Comment Written 23-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2023
    Thank you.
reply by Karen Cherry Threadgill on 23-Nov-2023
    :-)
Comment from BethShelby
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Now, quite a bit mor of the background come to light. We know Rebecca is William's daughter. I wonder if Paul knows he's not the father. I though Rebecca was an adult because she works but maybe not. It appears that Angela have something to do with Caz's death. It sound like Michelle did as well since she seems to be taking over and making plans. She say's William has sealed his fate by asking questions. That sound ominous. I look forward to more.

 Comment Written 23-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2023
    Thank you Beth, in the book Rebecca is twenty-years-old. I'm pleased that you're enjoying it.
Comment from karenina
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Okay! I'm patting myself on the back...first, for fanning you and following this story...

THEN because I knew William had to be Rebecca's father!

Really nice job here "showing" us with concise descriptions of the cafe, Michelle's reactions, the toss of the photo on the table...

We're on to something now and things, I suspect, are going to get wildly complicated!

Karenina

 Comment Written 23-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2023
    Thank you Karenina, there are a few more secrets still to be revealed.
Comment from Lea Tonin1
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Yes, I have read, a couple of these chapters of this book so far this guy who
comes come back from her past cannot be a very good guy. Angela and michelle, You have them so well written they are completely believable.
All your characters are vibrant. Now they're gonna take care of william. I mean I have all the fox drake cause I only Bread a couple. But I do recognize good writing. And this is good right for sure very talented hands. I'll see no issue with grammar punctuation, esthetics or subject matter. A fine submission! I wish you best luck have a great day jacob!

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2023
    Thank you Lea.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
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This is great and getting nicely complicated and intense. Michelle is, at least, very level-headed, it seems, while Angela, the loose cannon, is needing to calm down and listen to some sound advice. Even the thought of getting William's address was enough to get her worked up and that didn't sound difficult at all. Following him, however - a whole different ballgame. This is building up nicely, Jacob. I didn't see any errors in the main body but only in the intro: "fed up of with (?)"; "alsocontacted (needs a space between). But an excellent, very readable post. Looking forward to reading more. Debbie

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 23-Nov-2023
    Thank you Debbie, I?m pleased that you enjoyed it.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
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I reckon it should be quite easy to get hold of William's address. He applied for a job and Angela was part of the interviewing process. But you added a bit of excitement here as she may have to follow him to see where he lives. Another fine chapter Jacob and your story is coming along nicely, love Dolly x x x

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
    Thank you Dolly!
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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So now we know that William is Rebecca's father, but we still don't know what happened to Caz. I am really liking this story and you're doing a great job writing it. Thank you for sharing it with us.

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2023
    Thank you Barbara!