Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

At this Amsterdam Fair, they developed this kolf course , which no one has played being a brand new game, correct? And you mention about some of the teams returning the following year with the hopes of doing better. How are these teams to practice? Have I missed something? I'm a little confused (and it does not take much).

Other then that, I felt this chapter was well written and exciting in the games development with a good continuous story line. Three postings for the final match.. going to be exciting.

Cheers, Jim.
John

 Comment Written 15-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023

Not quite brand new. Remember that they had demonstrated the game at last year's fair and also taken a tour around Holland the past few months, so many people had been exposed to the game and had been instructed on how to make the equipment and lay out the holes from those experiences. Presumably, these were the folks who came to this year's fair to compete. That's why the kids recognized a few of them. In later chapters, they will also be building more courses around the area.

BTW, I made your Kielbasa and Sauerkraut with the side of Kopytka last night, and it was a big hit! Great tip about rinsing the sauerkraut and squeezing out the water. Took out some of the extreme tang.

reply by jmdg1954 on 15-Aug-2023

Duh... totally forgot about the Holland tour they did over a number of months to promote the game (my mind is a scary place sometimes).

Awesome, thanks for trying the meal. Did you also add the oatmeal to the sauerkraut?

reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023

Yes. You couldn't even tell by the time it was all done. Just dissolves in there. Great thickening agent.

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Wow, so you're wrapping this up in three more posts? But how will this relate back to the first time period which is somewhere in the future? The past history of golf/kolf will have an impact in saving the game in the future? Anyway, it's great that the people of Kilian's time are so supportive and interested in this new sport. Usually, anything new gets disparaged terribly.

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023

Not quite. I'm only wrapping up this golf match in 3 posts. We are 3/4 of the way through Part 1, but we still have some more time travels before we settle back into 2032.

There will be 4 parts altogether. Part 1 will definitely be the longest (40,000 words). I'm guessing the other 3 parts will be about equal to that.

The idea is that in each of the time travels, we will learn something about the game that either needs to be preserved or overcome for the game to continue into the future. That's the purpose of the time travels. The solution will come in Part 4.

For a non-golfer, it's hard to fathom the effect golf has on some people. It just either grabs you or it doesn't. When I was about 10 years old, my dad took my two brothers and me golfing for the first time. I became infatuated with the game, but neither of my brothers did likewise. You're right about new things being disparaged, and we'll see a little of that when we get to Scotland, but there were enough who just became enthralled with the game to want to play it.

Comment from Carol Hillebrenner

Excellent

It's rather expected they would win, but it was good that they had some good competition. Their uncle should open a golf course for people to play on so they would be better competition for the next year.

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023

They've still got one match to go before being declared the winners. The final match should prove to be the most challenging. I like your idea about Oom Gerrit's course continuing as a golf course. Perhaps it did become the first golf course in Holland and is there to this day. Who knows?

Comment from lancellot

Excellent

Another well written and edited chapter. Everything and everyone seems to be enjoying the new game. Fun for all. Teams of all women. Women and men all playing in the sun. Are you sure about this being the 1200s? You may want to increase the centuries a by a few hundred. It's fine for FanStory, but off site, some may wonder how all this is possible then. Even the balls do seem to be damaged from being hit.

notes:


The announcement said that registration of teams would begin at 8 o'clock and be closed at 9 o'clock,

-Are you sure about this. You may be about a hundred years too early for such accurate time, and common use of clocks.

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023

They used sun dials to tell the time in those days. I'm not sure what the stated measure of time was (o'dial perhaps?) but I chose to use our unit of measure for this one.

I chose the 13th century for the beginning of the game because that is one of the few known facts about golf--that the first semblance of the game began in Holland in the 1200s. It was originally played with a stick called a kolf and a ball on the ice during winter and out in the fields during the rest of the year. The object was to hit a target with the ball, and eventually the target became a hole to put the ball in.

Historians differ on the true beginning of golf, many believing it was Scotland, but I think the fact that the name golf is so similar to kolf, that the true origin was Holland in the 1200s.

Comment from Jay Squires

Excellent

This is where you do so well: Like a color commentator, you take the reader alongside you as you play, and as you describe the others playing. A lot of fun. I enjoyed the parallel between the food and drink stands with the present-day coffee shops they have at golf courses. Anneke Papin brought them a food basket. (Should she have been on the character list? I noted below, a few problems with tenses:

"So far, we have not had to play this in either of our first two matches ..." [So far, we HAD not had to play this in either of our first two matches.]

All we need is a win or tie on any of those last three holes, and the match will be ours. [You slipped into the present tense here. "All we NEEDED ..." and "... the match WOULD be ours."]

So far, among the folks we have played against [For some reason, beginning here and continuing on to the end of your chapter, you lapsed again into the present tense. "So far, among the folks we Had played against ..." etc.]

And that's about it. It was a fun read, even with those few distractions.

Jay

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 15-Aug-2023

You are right about Mevr Papin. I just forgot to add her first name the way I did with Fredrik Papin to the character list. I've fixed it now.

I also agree with your tense changes which I have since fixed. I have to be careful of that and usually catch it in my proofing, but these got by me. I do believe it's appropriate to use some present tense when relating the story in past tense when what's being narrated will continue into the future. Hence I will keep the sentence "That bodes well for the future" in present tense, but you were right about the things you noted. Thanks for picking these up with such a close reading, Jay.

Comment from Tom Horonzy

Excellent

Being European I see the need for match play. Have you plans to introduce stroke play in the tome?
The story was well told and had me holding my breath with the last match as
Did Glover yesterday after dunking one into the pond

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023

We won't see stroke play in Holland, and not too much of it either in Scotland with one notable exception. I've just begun writing that, so I don't quite have it all figured out yet, but I think I know what it will be.

The best match is coming and ended up taking 6,000 words to complete it, so I've had to break it up into 3 segments. But each one will end at a good stopping point.

That was quite an exciting final match yesterday. Glover really hung in there with those 3 incredible putts on the back 9. Hooray for the old guys!

Comment from w.j.debi

Excellent

The tournament went well. It appears the group is drumming up a following for their new game. People are looking forward to next year already. They even had to turn a few people away.
While they are worried about the details of the tournament, they are lucky to have a practical person who loves to watch them play provide lunch for them. LOL

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023

It's not over yet. They still have one more match to play to become the winners. We will see those rules from a previous post come into play here. Hopefully it will be exciting. That match alone took 6,000 words to write in the novel, so I've had to break it up into 3 pieces.

reply by w.j.debi on 14-Aug-2023

I'll be waiting.

Comment from JSD

Excellent

Awesome. Great instalment. Really looking forward to the next game. I liked the way you emphasised the sportsmanship and manners. Well done.

John

"Poetry is the space between words."

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023

Thanks, John. We will see a bit of contrast to that in the final match of the tournament.

Comment from royowen

Excellent

Grace always works well, and although Kilian and co Won Kilian realised, realised graciously that their opponents had less experience than their opponents, however their sporting foes were likewise gracious, aren't women marvellous creatures? They always remember fine detail, like catering. Well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023

Yep. Arie's mom knew the boys wouldn't think about a meal, nor her daughter who's sort of a tomboy. So she came through in a big way.

reply by royowen on 14-Aug-2023

Yep, you know!

Comment from Pam Lonsdale

Excellent

Okay, where are the bad dudes who roughed up Arie last time around? I kept thinking they'd be back looking for some revenge.

It sounds like the tournament is a great success, and I can imagine these competitors going home, teaching others to play, then having their own local contests to get ready for the big one at the fair each year.

Another well-written piece, Jim.

Pam

 Comment Written 14-Aug-2023

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reply by the author on 14-Aug-2023

We've still got one match to go before the tournament has a winner. This last one will prove to be a lot more suspenseful, and we'll see those rules come into play and perhaps a bit of revenge.