Orange
Memories of Mom11 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
Wow, this is an excellent poem. No wonder you won the contest. This is full of imagery, metaphor and emotion. The sensory images of teeth crunching apples, feeling the wind, sticky juice, and licking fingers build toward the ending.
Love the line, "You were autumn to me" as it leads into great visual imagery.
Thank you for sharing this.
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2023
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Wow, this is an excellent poem. No wonder you won the contest. This is full of imagery, metaphor and emotion. The sensory images of teeth crunching apples, feeling the wind, sticky juice, and licking fingers build toward the ending.
Love the line, "You were autumn to me" as it leads into great visual imagery.
Thank you for sharing this.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2023
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Thank you very much!
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
This is a good entry into the Sunset Poetry contest. The text is a good size. The message is stated with clarity and is easily understood. There are some great lines of descriptive, sensory details in your poem} warmth of sun, burnt orange tips, crunching teeth, sticky juices...etc.
Your poem is imbalanced in the poem box. Drop the first line down one space to match the spacing at the bottom of your poem. Good spacing add to the presentation. The visual fits perfectly. Good luck in the contest. I voted for you.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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This is a good entry into the Sunset Poetry contest. The text is a good size. The message is stated with clarity and is easily understood. There are some great lines of descriptive, sensory details in your poem} warmth of sun, burnt orange tips, crunching teeth, sticky juices...etc.
Your poem is imbalanced in the poem box. Drop the first line down one space to match the spacing at the bottom of your poem. Good spacing add to the presentation. The visual fits perfectly. Good luck in the contest. I voted for you.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, Orange, has the proper formatting and finds the myriad of instances and examples of the color and its effect on relationship and memory. Nice.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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This poem, Orange, has the proper formatting and finds the myriad of instances and examples of the color and its effect on relationship and memory. Nice.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
Comment from Mary Shifman
This is a beautiful poem and I very much enjoyed reading it. It rhymes beautifully and had gorgeous imagery. It makes me recall those days when my brother and I wandered the hills and played in the leaves. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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This is a beautiful poem and I very much enjoyed reading it. It rhymes beautifully and had gorgeous imagery. It makes me recall those days when my brother and I wandered the hills and played in the leaves. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
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You are welcome.
What are you referring to when you ask me to send links? I'm good with word processing but I don't know a lot about computers.
Comment from Wendy G
That is a beautiful poem, with an equally lovely presentation, and the memories are triggered by the vivid colours of the sunset with its red and orange tones. A lovely tribute to a close relationship with your mother as well. Best wishes for the contest.
Wendy
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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That is a beautiful poem, with an equally lovely presentation, and the memories are triggered by the vivid colours of the sunset with its red and orange tones. A lovely tribute to a close relationship with your mother as well. Best wishes for the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
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Thank you. That would be good. Just click on my name, then go to main menu and choose Become a Fan, or just choose something from my portfolio.
OR Go to the top row and choose the heading Community. In the drop down box choose Find a Member, select W then look for Wendy G and under my menu click on Become a Fan or just go yo my Portfolio and you will see all my work. If you are a fan you get a message every time someone posts any writing.
Best wishes.
Wendy
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Great entry for the "Sunset Poem writing contest.
Wonderful poem that has a zen feeling to it. I really like the way you mix nature and human nature. Excellent imagery.
I love the presentation.
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2023
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Great entry for the "Sunset Poem writing contest.
Wonderful poem that has a zen feeling to it. I really like the way you mix nature and human nature. Excellent imagery.
I love the presentation.
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
Comment Written 24-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 09-Dec-2023
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Thanks! I try to be even-keeled and I love when I can write.
Comment from Sarah Das Gupta
A poem full of detailed descriptions and colour. The way the poet thinks of her mother as being part of the essence of Autumn, its scents, colours and sounds. The poem retains an elegiac tone.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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A poem full of detailed descriptions and colour. The way the poet thinks of her mother as being part of the essence of Autumn, its scents, colours and sounds. The poem retains an elegiac tone.
Comment Written 23-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
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Best wishes from Cambridge,UK
Comment from Carol Clark2
It is neat that the orange sunset brings thoughts of the fun times you had with your mom. I'm so sorry she passed when you were only a child, and I'm glad you have happy memories of her. Best wishes in the contest. Carol
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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It is neat that the orange sunset brings thoughts of the fun times you had with your mom. I'm so sorry she passed when you were only a child, and I'm glad you have happy memories of her. Best wishes in the contest. Carol
Comment Written 23-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
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Much of my writing is here on FanStory. You can search under the Community tab for CarolClark2. I look forward to your review.
Comment from pome lover
that is a beautiful, wonderful poem about your mother and your happy memories of her and the things you did together.
I think, in the second line, you meant to say, as in the sunset, instead of is.
But the rest is a very special accolade and remembrance!
Katharine
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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that is a beautiful, wonderful poem about your mother and your happy memories of her and the things you did together.
I think, in the second line, you meant to say, as in the sunset, instead of is.
But the rest is a very special accolade and remembrance!
Katharine
Comment Written 23-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 24-Mar-2023
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orange is the sunset perhaps I will reread the previous version and look for erroneous edits - Thanks so much!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
You have some fond memories of your Mother here in your poem, the times you shared outside and the activities you remember with her, I am so sorry for your loss, a fine heartfelt and endearing poem, love Dolly x
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reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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You have some fond memories of your Mother here in your poem, the times you shared outside and the activities you remember with her, I am so sorry for your loss, a fine heartfelt and endearing poem, love Dolly x
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2023
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Thanks so much!
Send me links to your work and will review :)
