missed opportunity
1-6-1 contest entry4 total reviews
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Ooooooh. Everyone's worst fear...that they didn't get the chance for one last good-by kiss and "I love you." It's extreme talent that you can convey so much and strike at a reader's hear with just eight freakin syllables, Mystery Writer!! I am duly impressed. Great work. I hope you boogie down to the winner's circle!! xo
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2022
  |
Ooooooh. Everyone's worst fear...that they didn't get the chance for one last good-by kiss and "I love you." It's extreme talent that you can convey so much and strike at a reader's hear with just eight freakin syllables, Mystery Writer!! I am duly impressed. Great work. I hope you boogie down to the winner's circle!! xo
Comment Written 07-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2022
-
Thanks Rachel for that support and your superb review! Of course, the flip side might be that one of the couple did it intentionally to break off their relationship LOL Honestly, your vision was my intent.
-
I was thinking 9/11...airplane, the towers still intact...I did end up voting for you. Hope you can boogie down to the winner's circle!!
-
9-11 would be a good synopsis for this idea. Too bad, I did not have your insight before I posted it (-;
-
I doubt I'm the only one who thought it, though. For me, it came through loud and clear.
-
Rachel,
Possibly your earlier contest vote will keep me on the podium steps. Regardless, in hindsight (with your idea), it would have been a much stronger contender if it had been written as:
late
to 9-11 gate ~
fate
que sera, sera!
-
Damn!!! Well, it was still excellent. I voted for it.
-
Rachelle,
Thanks again! Your vote got me to the lowest podium rung. I always am appreciate of receiving those FS funny monies for any placement (-;
A 9-11 nuance would have likely garnered more support. That was a very good insight.
Mark
-
My pleasure. And congrats!!
Comment from tempeste
Ciao mystery poet,
It's never happened to me but I can imagine the frustration it would cause.
Also I believe it's best to make time when farewells are concerned because life is so unpredictable.
PS: the contest requires that ALL three lines rhyme!
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2022
|
Ciao mystery poet,
It's never happened to me but I can imagine the frustration it would cause.
Also I believe it's best to make time when farewells are concerned because life is so unpredictable.
PS: the contest requires that ALL three lines rhyme!
Comment Written 06-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2022
-
late gate fate are my rhymes - if they must be at the end of each line, hopefully the committee will alert me so I can revise before the voting takes place
-
I am curious to see what the committee will decided 😐
I wish you all the best.
Ciao !
-
You have 3 votes now. I thought the theme was fresh and something we all can relate to.
-
Your vote help garner me a tie for third place. In my redo life, a stronger poem in hindsight would have been:
late
to 9-11 gate?
fate
Mark
P.S. Still happy with my FS winnings (-; I am a mutual fan of the winner of this 1-6-1 contest. He typically writes longer entries.
-
Ciao Marco!
Your updated version packs a punch .. you should keep it for future use.
Actually, I am familiar with RodG?s vivid ( full of detail) poetry and he has received many 6 star reviews from me.
That said, I personally think in this particular contest your poem was better than his and Jan s.
Why?
Because love and seasonal poems are such common themes on fanstory. Your poem was very creative and the theme original.
-
Thanks! I rarely look at a fan?s portfolio. But after seeing that Rod beat me out (normally I don?t review his longer posts), I reviewed it - amazed to see all his first places within the last year - incredible performance !!!
Mark
-
Thanks for this review!
Comment from jmdg1954
late
to gate, farewell kiss missed fate
Syllable count spot on. The few words written told a story. But it hasn't revealed the long term outcome of the missed kiss.
Best of luck in the contest.
Cheers, John
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
|
late
to gate, farewell kiss missed fate
Syllable count spot on. The few words written told a story. But it hasn't revealed the long term outcome of the missed kiss.
Best of luck in the contest.
Cheers, John
Comment Written 05-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
-
John,
Create your own sequel to the outcome. Thanks for your review!
Comment from JPGeo
Geez, how long does a farewell kiss take? Too much pda if it takes that long. Grab a little face, no tongue and get on with it. Or,
as fate would have it you avoid the farewell affection by rushing off, ON PURPOSE!
Call me when you land, dear.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
|
Geez, how long does a farewell kiss take? Too much pda if it takes that long. Grab a little face, no tongue and get on with it. Or,
as fate would have it you avoid the farewell affection by rushing off, ON PURPOSE!
Call me when you land, dear.
Comment Written 05-Dec-2022
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
-
The ?dear? may not call. It is a good excuse if it really was on purpose. I did not envision that outcome when I penned this contest entry LOL