What Would You Do...
... on a Cold Winterâ??s Morn?11 total reviews
Comment from Richard Montfort Cary
Rather delightful! The final stanza makes the whole poem work!!! Thanks for the smile................................................................................................
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2022
Rather delightful! The final stanza makes the whole poem work!!! Thanks for the smile................................................................................................
Comment Written 01-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2022
-
Appreciate your reading
Comment from poetwatch
It must be cold where you is at, author. :) I don't know why the weather is the way it is, "But for me, a guy, my withers do quiver?" Do you mean bones? I believe "fritters" means feet. :) I know what my "jewels" is. Thank you for sharing. Edit the "... on a Cold Winterâ??s Morn?"
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2022
It must be cold where you is at, author. :) I don't know why the weather is the way it is, "But for me, a guy, my withers do quiver?" Do you mean bones? I believe "fritters" means feet. :) I know what my "jewels" is. Thank you for sharing. Edit the "... on a Cold Winterâ??s Morn?"
Comment Written 28-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2022
-
It's not cold and bones would not have rhymed.
-
It's not cold and bones would not have rhymed.
Comment from papa55mike
Hopefully under a thick quilt, with a roaring fire in the fireplace. Since I've gotten older, the cold and I don't get along. What a wonderfully written poem.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2022
Hopefully under a thick quilt, with a roaring fire in the fireplace. Since I've gotten older, the cold and I don't get along. What a wonderfully written poem.
Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 28-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2022
-
Thank you
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Your poem is skillfully and creatively written and vividly descriptive. You have made great use of the "If I was . . . " intro to convey a message about how nature's creatures fare in the winter elements better than we do!
Comical ending :-)
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
Your poem is skillfully and creatively written and vividly descriptive. You have made great use of the "If I was . . . " intro to convey a message about how nature's creatures fare in the winter elements better than we do!
Comical ending :-)
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
I try... and now find CEC"s taking offense to what I write and when.
Have you such an experience. IN three weeks, I have been counseled to edit one, (Charlie) or be DQ'd, have been Disqualified on another
(Dark) telling me there was no character and it was not fiction.
-
No, I haven't. Your poem is REALLY tame compared to some I've read on here!
-
I need to watch my P's and Q's. The committee has DQ'd me once, and threatened me thrice, for rules not clearly specified, or mentioned at all.
-
Do you ever put warnings with your poems? Doing that might help.
-
I do though besides the ending, which was quite bland, I did not see anything therein to warn of. You think I should have for sexual content?
-
Probably so
Comment from jessizero
This was very entertaining! Dealing with the cold is something to which everyone can relate. Thanks for sharing this with the community. Best wishes, and keep up the good work.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
This was very entertaining! Dealing with the cold is something to which everyone can relate. Thanks for sharing this with the community. Best wishes, and keep up the good work.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
all smiles here.
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
You did a great job with the prompt, very creative. I enjoyed the humor in your writing. The descriptive words you chose painted crystal clear imagery. I felt a shiver as I read.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
You did a great job with the prompt, very creative. I enjoyed the humor in your writing. The descriptive words you chose painted crystal clear imagery. I felt a shiver as I read.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
you are kind
Comment from PoemsOfDD
This is an enjoyable and lighthearted rhyming poem.
My favourite being the first couplet. However, from two lines throughout, the ending then goes onto four lines. Perhaps add a return to make it two lines.
I hope you don't mind this next thought but the end two lines suddenly do not rhyme - end and bed. As an alternative thought, I have added a suggestion.
Wishing and praying this day will end
So, my "jewels" and I can get into bed.
or - suggestion:
Wishing and praying this day will soon end
So with my love 'Jewel' in bed I can spend.
Good luck in the competition.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
This is an enjoyable and lighthearted rhyming poem.
My favourite being the first couplet. However, from two lines throughout, the ending then goes onto four lines. Perhaps add a return to make it two lines.
I hope you don't mind this next thought but the end two lines suddenly do not rhyme - end and bed. As an alternative thought, I have added a suggestion.
Wishing and praying this day will end
So, my "jewels" and I can get into bed.
or - suggestion:
Wishing and praying this day will soon end
So with my love 'Jewel' in bed I can spend.
Good luck in the competition.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
all couplets refer to animals. The quad to me. appreciate yourf thoughts. Thanks you.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I enjoyed the sentiments here but some lines are out of metre. I have given you a suggestion for this one:
This line is out of metre:
"I'd stay in a warren feeling nice and warm".
suggest:
"I'd stay in a warren to feel nice and warm".
Good luck with the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
I enjoyed the sentiments here but some lines are out of metre. I have given you a suggestion for this one:
This line is out of metre:
"I'd stay in a warren feeling nice and warm".
suggest:
"I'd stay in a warren to feel nice and warm".
Good luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Understood and welcomed.
Comment from Bill Schott
This spiritual poem, What Would You Do?, follows the required rhyme scheme and brings the many animals in out of that "bad for your nads" weather. Fun.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
This spiritual poem, What Would You Do?, follows the required rhyme scheme and brings the many animals in out of that "bad for your nads" weather. Fun.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Being the clown as I am... it was fun.
Comment from Mickamus J
Thank you for sharing. Does it seem like you spent a lot of time outdoors? Cause you seem to know where the critters hide when the cold comes. I found it funny and engaging.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
Thank you for sharing. Does it seem like you spent a lot of time outdoors? Cause you seem to know where the critters hide when the cold comes. I found it funny and engaging.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
I read a lot of critters in my youth.
-
Cool! Have a good day!