Exceptional A tribute to a backseat driver The Light's Now Effing Green by bob cullen      Back Seat Driver Contest Winner

The Light's Now Effing Green She sits right there beside him And she's nagging all the time. Back seat driving is legal But it ought to be a crime. He always goes the wrong way "Did you ever learn to drive?" He can't say what he's thinking If he speaks he'll not survive. She's no good with directions She confuses left with right. Blames all errors that she makes On him, then she starts a fight. Says he's just like his father He don't listen to his wife. Dad's presently in prison Doing twenty years to life. When he went to court he said, "Your Honour I can explain. T'was taking the wife shopping She started at me again. I opened the door and pushed She slid out onto the road I heard her screaming at me But I never ever slowed He sits in his prison cell Relieved 'cause he's all alone. The one thing he's not missing Is her harping nagging tone. His days in jail are peaceful At last his world is serene There's peace of mind no nagging "Go, the light is effing green." Writing Prompt The topic for this writing contest is: Back Seat Driver Back Seat Driver Contest Winner Author Notes Not based on anyone I know. Just in case the wife is reading.

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