I can't say quite how bad it sounds-
My dear old husband sleeps around.
When out on our last date,
He passed out in his plate,
All the patrons stared and they frowned.
When the waiter served second course --
I nudged him, he awoke with such force,
His jerk launched his drink,
My face just turned pink,
He ordered dessert sans remorse.
This 'black tie' affair, turning grayer,
I wished I'd married a bricklayer.
I urged him, "We should go."
But he, of course, said no,
"That's just nonsense, dear, I'm the Mayor."
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Author Notes
No apologies to my husband, James, needed... this is pure fiction and fun!
Picture courtesy of Pixabay
Limerick (courtesy of shadowpoetry.com)
A Limerick is a rhymed humorous or nonsense poem of five lines which originated in Limerick, Ireland. The Limerick has a set rhyme scheme of : a-a-b-b-a with a syllable structure of: 9-9-6-6-9. The rhythm of the poem should go as follows: Lines 1, 2, 5: weak, weak, STRONG, weak, weak, STRONG, weak, weak, STRONG, weak, weak Lines 3, 4: weak, weak, STRONG, weak, weak, STRONG, weak, weak This is the most commonly heard first line of a limerick: "There once was a man from Nantucket."
variations: 88558 or 99669 syllables, with the only difference being the number of dahs as the start of each line.
http://www.grammarly.com/blog/2015/five-most-famous-limericks-and-their-histories/ (Find the first Nantucket Limerick here, and some funny other reading)
Edward Lear's first influential limerick collection, A Book of Nonsense, hit bookstore shelves nearly 200 years ago. Lear didn't invent the limerick, however; the snappy five-line poems probably sprang to life on the streets and in the taverns of 14th century Britain. Over time, people from all walks of life - children, scholars, drunks, beggars - have delighted in the witty limerick.
(courtesy of Poets.org)
Book of Nonsense, 1, 10 & 11
Edward Lear, 1812 - 1888
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1.
There was an Old Man with a beard,
Who said, "It is just as I feared!--
Two Owls and a Hen,
Four Larks and a Wren,
Have all built their nests in my beard!"
10.
There was an Old Man in a tree,
Who was horribly bored by a Bee;
When they said, "Does it buzz?"
He replied, "Yes, it does!
"It's a regular brute of a Bee!"
12.
There was a Young Lady whose chin,
Resembled the point of a pin:
So she had it made sharp,
And purchased a harp,
And played several tunes with her chin.
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