My husband he came home this week
Thrilled I was to see him
But then I had the other one
Cardboard cut out fill in.
I had to take him out the back
And fold him up you see
Cause my dear husband's home again
His heart belongs to me.
"But dear" he says "I'll not be long
With you before I go
Return I must, the job's not done
I thought you ought to know"
And so out back I went to see
My cardboard cut out man
It won't be long, you'll rise again
For I do have a plan.
The days went by and life was good
My real one was about
He wined and dined me every night
He really went all out.
But now today he's gone again
We kissed before we parted
And who knows when I'll see him next
My plan now must be started.
I'll take the suit off cut out man
And dress him up like hubby
In work clothes iridescent bright
I'll give to him a stubby.
I'll sit him in the real one's chair
Just like he's never left
This cardboard cut out substitute
Will not leave me bereft.
I'll take him down to our mates' place
Each Friday night at five
We'll chat about our weekly work
Then back home I will drive.
I'll take him down to 'Bunnings' too
To buy some tools and wood
Then in the shed he'll supervise
Just like my real one would.
I think I might just like this one
To fill my awful void
Until my real one comes back home
From where he's now deployed.
But while he's gone, I'll have some fun
With cardboard cut out man
Who'll have no say, just go along
With all that I may plan.
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Author Notes
This is version two about my 'cardboard cut out husband' who I made a few months ago to take to a dinner party as a joke because my real one was away working interstate and couldn't be home for the occasion. So I made a cardboard cut out version and dressed him in a suit etc and took him. My family and friends thought it quite funny and I got quite a bit of mileage form this. Lol
However my husband did come home for 10 days and informed me that he was going away again for 2 months., which he did. SO I took the suit off my original cardboard version and dressed him in my husbands work clothes and took him down our mates place for our Friday night drinks and get together. Once again this version proved quite funny and we 'raise a glass and say Hi to him when we do Friday's.
My real husband did return home and he could see the funny side of my prank and even 'had a drink 'with the cardboard one.
But wait he has just told me he will be going away again soon so I shall think of something else to do with my cardboard version
I couldn't resist writing a poem about this and this one is the second one I have posted
The original one is still in my portfolio on Fanstory but no photo attached as I didn't know how to add images when I posted that one called My Cardboard Cutout Husband so if you want to read that feel free to access this on my portfolio( it may help understand this version and reference to the suit etc.
Anyway thank you for reading this version and I hope you embrace my weird sense of humour. My kids often think I have ' gone mad' but I can't help myself sometimes I love life and find fun it lots of things.
Stubby is a small bottle of beer
Bunnings is a hardwear store in Australia for the handyman, and tradesman. (My husband gets withdrawal symptoms I'd he can't ' go to Bunning's at least once a week!!)
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