Exceptional A short funny apple gathering story. Muddy Plucking Apples by Quoiky

It was late October, and my grand babies and I were collecting the last of the apples still dangling from the tree. The only problem was, they were dangling from a branch hanging directly over a muddy creek. To help with our collecting, I bought some 'mud boots.' These are high rubber boots, that on a normal sized person, they would come to their mid-calves. Since I am just at five feet tall, they fit me more mid-knee. Ordinarily, it's a good thing to have high boots if you plan to wade in a creek....unless you step in the mud of a slow-flowing creek. The mud was like stepping into glutinous, gummy, quick sand. I had the three grand kids, Emma (8), Hayden (6), and Damien (4), wait on the 'grassy knoll' while I made my descent into the creek. NOTE TO SELF: wearing knee high boots does not make you taller, especially if said boots get stuck in the mud and fill up with icy, icky, muddy water, which slowly sucks you under...inch by inch. Picture this: I'm in the creek with my knee high boots. My right foot is already well below the water and mud level, so much so that my boot is now full of icy, muddy water, causing a wonderfully tight suction on my right foot and leg. It felt like the Devil himself had hold of my foot! I tried to free myself with my left foot by stepping on a broken, rotting tree branch which immediately sunk along with my foot, leg and boot. My legs are now about two feet apart. I look like I'm riding an invisible horse. The more weight I put on my right foot trying to wriggle my left foot free, the deeper I go, and visa versa. By now, I'm nearly crotch level with the creek. The kids were still watching from the side. Nobody panicked, except me. Everybody who knows me, knows that I'm not much of a praying person, but there was a LOT of "Jesus! Mary! And Joseph's" being chanted that day! Hayden ran to the side of the creek, found a long, loose branch and threw it to me. Emma yelled, "I'll go call daddy to bring the tractor!". Damien said..."Gram, can you get me that apple hanging over there?" By using the stick Hayden threw, and grabbing some small trees, I was able to free my left foot from the boot-water-mud grave. I stretched a little more and put my bare, left foot on the same small trees I was holding. Gripping the tiny branches with my now naked toes, like my ancient ancestor, the monkey, I finally pulled out my bootless, sockless, black-mud covered, right foot. If anybody wants those dangling apples, they can go get 'em. And if anybody is interested in a brand new, perfectly good pair of knee high boots, they're in the creek. If you can find 'em, you can have 'em! Recognized Author Notes The things you learn on a farm.

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