Background
Rachelle gets the idea to have a few of the Fan Storians to a cocktail party in hers and Gretchen's elegant suite before the Fan Story Convention. They come, but Jane crashes it and bedlam insues.
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As two policemen barge into Rachelle and Gretchen's party, Jane's next missile of artichoke dip hits Tom Ens. He is a guest, and also the host of the Fan Story Convention. Furious, he walks over, ready to grab her and ask what in the devil is her problem. However, the policemen get to her first, and take her out into the hall and explain that they have been hired by her father and will arrest Rachelle for assault if she attacks Jane.
Rachelle, also furious at sauce all over her gorgeous green dress, is delighted to see the police take Jane away. But then, they come back in and have the gall to arrest her! The guests are appalled and rally around her, all protesting at once.
"WHO'S SO HOITY TOITY NOW, HUH?" Jane yells, laughing hysterically.
There is knocking at the door. The police stop, waiting to see who it is. Gretchen has extracted herself from under the food table and goes to answer it.
An attractive, important looking man in a green Masters Golf Tournament jacket, introduces himself as Fred Ridley, chairman of the Augusta National Golf Club and states that he understands there is a guest who is impersonating an Augusta Master's Tournament winner, wearing a green Master's jacket which is not permitted.
Jim Wile pales and sneaks under the food table where he finds Judiverse, writing furiously, taking down everything that's being said. He sheds his jacket and asks her what she's doing.
"Writing a play," she says, shushing him so she can hear. "This will be so great."
Jim sneaks out the other side of the table, not knowing that Mr. Ridley is standing there looking around. Judy sees his jacket and pokes her head out and says, "Jim, your jacket will get dirty down here on the floor," and holds it up to him.
Mr. Ridley says, "Sir, have you been wearing that jacket?"
"Well, uh..."
"Are you aware that it is against the rules unless you are a winner of the Masters' Golf Tournament to wear that jacket?"
"Mr. Ridley," Jim says, "we're just having a bit of fun. I meant no harm."
Meanwhile, Rachelle, is spittin' mad and is on the phone with her husband who is on his way up. She is relaying to the police what her husband is saying as he says it. Jane is still smirking.
There's a quick bang on the door and Rachelle's husband storms in. He glares at the police who want to handcuff his wife, and demands to know what's going on.
Humpwhistle speaks up and says, "Officers, we'd like to see your badges if you don't mind."
Jane turns white. She knows her father. These guys are probably hired actors.
They flash their badges. Rachelle and her husband look at each other and burst out laughing. Rachelle says, "Those are fake! We've used them before at parties."
Jane furiously takes the fake police with their fake badges back out in the hall a lays into them.
Meanwhile, Mr. Ridley is fascinated with all the hullabaloo going on around him. Everybody is talking at the same time. He sees lovely Gretchen silently watching it all and asks if she would mind if he helped himself to some food and drink.
"By all means," she says in her soothing Southern drawl. "Help yoahself." She walks around the table with him, apologizing for the mess, and adding that Jim is such a nice fella and she hopes Mr. Ridley won't find it necessary to "do him hahm."
Ridley said he would speak with him and see under what circumstances Jim was in possession of the jacket.
The fake police, caught out, never-the-less stop Jane's harangue, and tell her that her father ordered them to bring her home, after she apologized to the hostesses. As they walk back inside, she starts to protest, and one "policeman" adds, "Your father also said if you come nicely, he has a new Jaguar for you."
Rachelle rolled her eyes in disgust. Jane looks at her and Gretchen and condescendingly says, "I apologize for crashing your stupid old party, but who needs it. I'm off to try out my new Jaguar," and saunters off with the two fake policemen.
Rachelle swallows, composes her face into a radiant smile, and says to everyone, "I had a truly powerful zinger all ready to let fly, but ... I held my tongue. Are you proud of me?"
"You bet!" says Gretchen, as the guests lift their drinks and chorus, "YES!"
"Well, let the party begin again!" Rachelle says, then mumbles under her breath to Gretchen,"I hope her father was lying!"
Suddenly, from under the table, comes a happy shout, "Ta dah!" as Judy finishes the first draft of her play.
~ ~ ~
Epilogue -
Rachelle, who had forgotten, in all the excitement, about the photographer she'd hired for the party, received pictures of the food-spattered and astonished guests. Why not? she thought, and gleefully sent each guest copies as a remembrance.
