FanStory.com - Scanner Malfunctionby Thesis

Good afternoon, thank you for swiping your Whole Foods rewards card, Karina.

Scanning her image... Wow, you look hot in that tight little dress. Sorry, I couldn’t help but notice.

Please begin scanning.

Four bottles of Decoy Cabernet, hmm, getting a little tipsy tonight?

What else do you have? A pound of scallops, four lobster tails, garlic, parsley, some pasta, olive oil, two baguettes, sounds like a party is happening soon.

You’re deviating from your usual yogurt, coconut water, and healthy food purchases. What lucky guy are you entertaining tonight?

Eggs, Dog Food, hmm, I thought you had a cat.

Pharmacy items, wait – the morning-after pill?? So, you are planning on...., I thought so, that dress and heels are dead giveaways.

Courvoisier XO, really, how predictable. I always thought you were a kick-ass woman, totally in control of your purchases, but based on tonight, my analysis has changed. I’m leaning toward slightly slutty, but you’re still buying quality products.

Maybe I’m being too harsh in my judgement.

Broccoli, Club crackers, Spanish Olives, Chicken stock, Cerulean Blue nail polish..., going for a younger sexy look? Sorry, that was uncalled for. My programmer must have been a lonely gamer.

Personal items, blue gloss lipstick, cherry bubble bath bomb..., I see where this is going.

Massage oil, vanilla candles..., okay, my circuits are going to explode! What else..., A role of rope..., is this turning into an S&M date? Personal lubricant..., this is getting quite interesting.

Override, Override......, My sensor read the store manager’s badge when he approached Karina.

“Ma’am, has this sensor been saying offensive things to you?”

“Yes, I will be filing a complaint against this store.”

“I apologize. I just had another complaint that it was making offensive remarks.”

Pulling the scanner's plug, he added, “Your entire order's on us.”