FanStory.com - Escape by Lea Tonin1

Yesterday I read a beautiful poem. It was from a mother to her daughter, conveying love, pride, and joy at being her parent. An offering she gave of support and love through this beautiful vehicle called writing.

I offered my review and when I was done the dam burst.

Silent tears fell down my face instead of wails of pain. Watching salty water fall onto my shirt, fingers shiny with the liquid, I remained...

I stayed that way until my tear ducts turned into a desert repast.

It's not because I'm sad but, because my joy for a daughter to have such a gift tells me again...have faith.

There was a leaf up my nose... Every time I breathed in, part of that leaf disappeared. Every time I breathed out, there was that leaf sitting there on the end of my nose as if it had every right to be there.

Sneezing several times popped my head out from the pile of leaves and debris I had buried myself in.

Dislodging myself I realized I was ill. Headache, sneezing, my body covered in scabs, my hair knotted with blood and dirt. My limbs were in such pain, that they almost refused my mind's commands.

Today was do or die, I knew it and began to make my way again after eating the last bit of Alpha Ghetti. I bid farewell to it as it was the last time I would eat that in this life if I could at all avoid it.

The bit of strength the food gave me could not be wasted. I must move when I could in any capacity that I was meant to.

I knew I was lost and had no clue which way to turn. I'm sure there was a way to figure out direction if I could only see through the canopy of the forest.

I knew this, the direction I was going was took me farther and farther away.

I made a harsh left turn. At that point, it could not be worse than where I was headed and that was deeper and deeper into the forest away from everything.

Climbing over more trees than I can count kicking branches and dirt out of my way to make passage. My world had shrunk to a simple thing, putting one foot in front of the other. Soon steps became harder. With each step, it became more of an effort to move.

Soon I stopped caring whether the branches hit me or not...there was no strength to lift my arms.

I staggered forth pushing and pulling until I noticed the path I took was not so filled up with the storm's gift.

The path I was on had less debris than the one that preceded me. It was not because the storm was less severe, but simply because of the break or the gap between one side of the forest and the other.

Piled up gently on either side of the trail and in places the mix of green and brown forest skirt tapered down where it slipped unspoken towards the center of the path.

The slight difference in terrain then became noticeable to me.

I stopped my mind wandering and looked down at the surrounding ground. I kicked aside some branches. Moved some pine needles, leaves and dirt away, as reasonably as my strength would allow.

There it was.

A main trail which I walked slightly diagonally into. My mind cleared and realized this was the way. Until that point, the world looked as if I was underwater. Wavy, abstracted light... that was the sight my eyes beheld.

I had to concentrate. I had to keep what was left of my mind processes and not let the illness take me...not yet anyway.

I followed the path as best as I could moving aside the smaller branches as I went conserving as much energy as I could, not too fast, not too slow and watching the placement of my feet so as not to fall.

Gradually, slowly I made my way out aided by one more small miracle that came before the day was out.

In a pile of debris, I found a torn-up jacket. It was beyond repair and could not be worn but, when I tossed it down again, I heard a jingle.

I searched in the remaining pocket and inside there was close to five dollars in change.

A small quirk of a smile took a shot at my face, but the energy just wasn't there.

I permitted myself one thought as I forced myself to walk the last hundred feet out, "Hot chocolate".

I dunno...seemed like a good thought to me at the time.

Pavement...shining bright pavement.

Like the road to heaven, it bloomed in light banishing the darkness which said it's night...

Down the road shone the yellow sign in brown lettering that said, Tim Hortons.

This was not the usual exit or the street I was used to seeing but rather on the other side of the provincial portion of this park.

I had walked many miles it seemed. I was mildly shocked at knowing that but too tired for real shock at that point.

I just wanted some relief.

The attendant behind the counter eyeballed my condition and gave me a look like I couldn't afford to buy hot chocolate.

She was right up to a point. But I wasn't gonna give her that satisfaction. I plunked my seventy give cents down and motioned for the hot chocolate which I drank so fast, I scalded my throat. Four dollars and thirteen cents in my hand. I splurged for a donut.

The clerk continued to give me the hairy eyeball but passed me the donut without conment.

Out the door, I went.

Out into the small strip mall I found myself. Swallowing my donut, each swallow brought pain to my throat.

I knew it was not because of the hot chocolate, but because I was ill.

I wanted to lie down. Anywhere so I could rest. Didn't matter. Grass ground, tent, bed, it was all gravy to me...not yet. On the street, Down a distance, I could see a lit booth.

Which to me meant "bus stop." Just a bit now and I can get onto a warm bus. I can sit down. I can lean my head against the window and finally, clearly rest, even for just a short time...

My mind proceeded to give me a short blank spot which then found me on the bus stop bench.

My well ran dry. I could move no further so there I stayed.

I stayed until a kind male voice reached me..."Did you want to get on the bus young lady?"

"I think you do..."

This journey stayed with me and still does to this very day.

It will always stay with me and will always remind me,

that when push comes to shove, that wellspring is still there...inside...and I can draw on that well anytime I must.

There was a leaf up my nose... Every time I breathed in, part of that leaf disappeared. Every time I breathed out, there was that leaf sitting there on the end of my nose as if it had every right to be there.

Sneezing several times popped my head out from the pile of leaves and debris I had buried myself in.

Dislodging myself I realized I was ill. Headache, sneezing, my body covered in scabs, my hair knotted with blood and dirt. My limbs were in such pain, that they almost refused my mind's commands.

Today was do or die, I knew it and began to make my way again after eating the last bit of Alpha Ghetti. I bid farewell to it as it was the last time I would eat that in this life if I could at all avoid it.

The bit of strength the food gave me could not be wasted. I must move when I could in any capacity that I was meant to.

I knew I was lost and had no clue which way to turn. I'm sure there was a way to figure out direction if I could only see through the canopy of the forest.

I knew this, the direction I was going was took me farther and farther away.

I made a harsh left turn. At that point, it could not be worse than where I was headed and that was deeper and deeper into the forest away from everything.

Climbing over more trees than I can count kicking branches and dirt out of my way to make passage. My world had shrunk to a simple thing, putting one foot in front of the other. Soon steps became harder. With each step, it became more of an effort to move.

Soon I stopped caring whether the branches hit me or not...there was no strength to lift my arms.

I staggered forth pushing and pulling until I noticed the path I took was not so filled up with the storm's gift.

The path I was on had less debris than the one that preceded me. It was not because the storm was less severe, but simply because of the break or the gap between one side of the forest and the other.

Piled up gently on either side of the trail and in places the mix of green and brown forest skirt tapered down where it slipped unspoken towards the center of the path.

The slight difference in terrain then became noticeable to me.

I stopped my mind wandering and looked down at the surrounding ground. I kicked aside some branches. Moved some pine needles, leaves and dirt away, as reasonably as my strength would allow.

There it was.

A main trail which I walked slightly diagonally into. My mind cleared and realized this was the way. Until that point, the world looked as if I was underwater. Wavy, abstracted light... that was the sight my eyes beheld.

I had to concentrate. I had to keep what was left of my mind processes and not let the illness take me...not yet anyway.

I followed the path as best as I could moving aside the smaller branches as I went conserving as much energy as I could, not too fast, not too slow and watching the placement of my feet so as not to fall.

Gradually, slowly I made my way out aided by one more small miracle that came before the day was out.

In a pile of debris, I found a torn-up jacket. It was beyond repair and could not be worn but, when I tossed it down again, I heard a jingle.

I searched in the remaining pocket and inside there was close to five dollars in change.

A small quirk of a smile took a shot at my face, but the energy just wasn't there.

I permitted myself one thought as I forced myself to walk the last hundred feet out, "Hot chocolate".

I dunno...seemed like a good thought to me at the time.

Pavement...shining bright pavement.

Like the road to heaven, it bloomed in light banishing the darkness which said it's night...

Down the road shone the yellow sign in brown lettering that said, Tim Hortons.

This was not the usual exit or the street I was used to seeing but rather on the other side of the provincial portion of this park.

I had walked many miles it seemed. I was mildly shocked at knowing that but too tired for real shock at that point.

I just wanted some relief.

The attendant behind the counter eyeballed my condition and gave me a look like I couldn't afford to buy hot chocolate.

She was right up to a point. But I wasn't gonna give her that satisfaction. I plunked my seventy give cents down and motioned for the hot chocolate which I drank so fast, I scalded my throat. Four dollars and thirteen cents in my hand. I splurged for a donut.

The clerk continued to give me the hairy eyeball but passed me the donut without conment.

Out the door, I went.

Out into the small strip mall I found myself. Swallowing my donut, each swallow brought pain to my throat.

I knew it was not because of the hot chocolate, but because I was ill.

I wanted to lie down. Anywhere so I could rest. Didn't matter. Grass ground, tent, bed, it was all gravy to me...not yet. On the street, Down a distance, I could see a lit booth.

Which to me meant "bus stop." Just a bit now and I can get onto a warm bus. I can sit down. I can lean my head against the window and finally, clearly rest, even for just a short time...

My mind proceeded to give me a short blank spot which then found me on the bus stop bench.

My well ran dry. I could move no further so there I stayed.

I stayed until a kind male voice reached me..."Did you want to get on the bus young lady?"

"I think you do..."

*I stopped my mind wandering and looked down at the surrounding ground. I kicked aside some branches. Moved some pine needles, leaves and dirt away, as reasonably as my strength would allow.***

*I had walked many miles it seemed. I was mildly shocked at knowing that but too tired for real shock at that point.***