Skar = Pons' clone and Vice Presidential hopeful (with Zora)
Pons Maninoff = keeping Skar on a short leash
MauMau= Zora's campaign manager
AB (Abracada Brah) = Zora's Dirty Tricks Coordinator
LorDee (Loralie DeSilva) = Presidential hopeful
Ned Nuckledd = Vice Presidential hopeful (with LorDee)
GED: = Ned's clone
Betty: = LorDee's campaign manager
AA (Abecedari Ann) = LorDee's Third Party Poet Laureate
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Previously, Zora Abebe and Loralie DeSilva have their respective campaign staff and affiliates meet at an abandoned Big Boy Restaurant. Everyone is jammed in tight and Abracada Brah, LorDee's dirty tricks director, has his henchmen pantsing people in the crowd. The henchmen are caught and ejected and the meeting of the two hopefuls and their groups begins
The scene opens in the restaurant with people clustered around the third party candidates, Loralie DeSilva and Zora Abebe, and their respective running mates, Ned and Skar. The other principals are in the crowd.
LorDee : (addressing the crowd) Well, we have certainly enjoyed an ice breaker for the ages.
Ned : You'd hafta go bowlin' wit a snoot fulla hard cider ta match it.
LorDee : No one wants that though.
Ned : I kin axshlee bowl purdy good win them bumpers is up.
LorDee : Let me introduce the the other person seeking nomination, Zora Abebe.
Zora : (steps in front of LorDee and addresses the crowd) Greetings men and women of color and all other associates. This is the beginning of the new world. THIS is a day when the balance of power in the world will begin to shift to those who can use it -- not abuse it.
MauMau: We must boldly step into the future and seize the reins of this runaway locomotive.
GED: I think you may have mixed your metaphors there, MeeMee.
MauMau gives GED the stink eye.
MauMau: You are excused, clone boy. Make like a tree and get on the bus, Gus.
GED: Wow! Words are silly puddy up your patoot, MauRON!
MauMau and GED begin wrestling and take up the floor space while the candidates press on.
Ned : Them fellers are usin' some a them there Gekko Groanin' holds.
Skar : It looks like GED is biting MauMau's nose.
Ned : That's the gekko part.
Skar : I think MauMau kneed GED in the crotch.
Ned : That'd be the groanin'.
LorDee : (shouting above the crowd) We will rise above this type of infighting and form a cohesive bond with which to proceed to victory.
Betty: May I speak to you, Your Ma -- I mean --
LorDee : That's okay, dear. Your Majesty is fine.
Betty: Thank you, Your Ma - I mean - no --right - I mean thank you YOUR MAJESTY!
LorDee : Keep it down, Betty.
Across the way, Pons, AA. and AB talk together.
Pons : Okay you two. We have to help salvage this attempt at a third party coalition.
AB : I'm sorry that those dummies got the wrong idea and caused all this delay and carnage.
AA : That type of honest reflection inspires me to create.
Pons : Well that's fine, Brah. I'm going to chose to believe you now.
AB : You are wise beyond your years, Panzy.
Pons : That's Pons.
AB : Oh, sorry, Panzy.
Abedaria Ann begins a poem while Pons and AB wrestle on the floor.
AA :
We are poised within the noise of the boys,
as they contest without rest to be the best;
although the present struggle is within us,
the battle hardened kin will win in the fin --- us?
