The wife gave me a list of all the things I shouldn’t grind.
And put it on the wall so I would heed it.
I start to put some eggshells in, she says, “You must be blind,
Or determined that you aren’t going to read it.”
One day I peeled potatoes and forgot to check the list.
She noticed—made me pull the peelings out.
“You never pay attention, and it really gets me pissed,
You imbecile!” then she began to pout.
I read the list again, and I admit I’m sometimes thick,
And down I dumped some used up coffee grounds.
The wife then spotted this; it made her downright apoplectic.
“Your flouting of these rules, it just astounds!”
She pulled it from the wall and said, “I really must insist
That you read it one more time this very minute!”
I noticed then that “wife” was not an item on the list.
I think I’m going to try to grind her in it!”
