Sometimes I think I truly have a warped sense of humor because of things I think would be funny.
For example:
If you walked into your doctor’s office and the receptionist or nurse came out into the waiting room and stuck the (gun) thermometer to your forehead, and you jerked back and said something like, “Whoa! That …made me…dizzy.” Or “OW!” Wouldn’t their expression be priceless?
Or, when your phone rings and somebody you don’t know says, “Katharine (or whatever your name is), how are you, today?” You know they’re either trying to sell something or to get you to donate to some cause, or vote AND donate for someone. Wouldn’t it be fun to say something like, “Oh, bless you for calling. I’ve got this rat cornered, here in my kitchen, and it could have rabies and would you call Critter Ridder for me and…” CLICK
Or, you’re picking up a new prescription at the drug store and the pharmacist asks if you have any questions. There are all kinds of things you could say, such as, “Oh, is this the one that makes you dizzy? Kinda gives you a high? Ha ha ha. Or, “I hope this doesn’t make me angry, like this one I used to take. I cursed at everybody.”
Or, if you’ve been forgetting things, lately, and your daughter calls and you answer the phone and say, “Well how was your trip?” knowing she hasn’t been anywhere. Of course, that could land you in assisted living. In another town.
There are other things I thought up, but of course, I didn’t write them down, and now they’re gone. Can’t remember anything 5 minutes. Maybe I’ll think of them later… in the shower… with nothing to write on.
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