| Humor Fiction posted August 6, 2020 | Chapters: |
...53 54 -55- 56... 
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Day 55
A chapter in the book The Corona saga
On Parole
by Iza Deleanu
| Background I decided to document how this virus is affecting my sanity. So feel free to join me in this experience, I hope the reading will become funnier, then what I posted so far. Thank you for reading. |
9th of May,
Day 55
Man, this Coronella has it all:
It has drama -- look at the politicians faking sadness and empathy three times a day before meals, so they can make your digestion go smoothly.
We have the essential workers screaming for PPE.
Teachers trying to tame the hoard over ZOOM.
People out of work drinking and "weeding".
Tourism shut down completely.
Triple lock-down: your country, city and your house.
Increase in number in fake Nostradamus scaring us with the end of the world.
The rate of divorces has gone up, as well as the domestic abuse.
The "bacon" section on our bodies have exploded just like the pandemic.
We have a flooding of fake tests and testers on the market.
Governments investing millions in defective PPE and medication.
Pharmaceutical companies are fighting for grants promising the best new thing, in regards with a miraculous cure and vaccination.
Listen to the gurus: drink holy pee and stay healthy.
Coronella brought on social media fake advice and news. If my grandmother will be alive, she will be an expert too.
Now they want us to wear not a detecting device not on our ankle, but a bloody app on our "smarties" that will tell everybody in our vicinity when we are sick.
China came up with the next great thing: an app that is tracking every move and that lets the vigilante and the police know that you went rogue, because you need it to get out of the house and buy some groceries.
Coronella, you are so lucky because you have been born in a communist country. People in China are following blindly whatever the government impose. Good luck in getting the same obedience here. We don't even want to wear a mask, and you think you are going to get my benevolent consent to track my every move.
Screw you, I am not on PAROLE. I am lucky to live in a normal country, where the government is asking nicely for your cooperation (please wear a mask, please keep the social distance, even the messages on the buses starts with a please), and if you refuse they do nothing to reinforce it.
The scientists from the University of Alberta came up with a "smartie" too. My friend sends me their app, that apparently, let other people know that you are coming, so they or you, can clear the way, The app works for smart phones, so you, iPhone'Rs, are screwed. All I must do is sign up. But, I am going ...not too!
I refuse to give them the power to collect my private information and use it for blackmail. Let's say that I am a politician and I want to taste "uncharted territories" aka cheating on my wiffie, this will be a golden mine in the next campaign for the opposition.
So sorry, Officer Coronella, this kitty is not on Parole! So, Bye-Bye!
.
Day 55
Man, this Coronella has it all:
It has drama -- look at the politicians faking sadness and empathy three times a day before meals, so they can make your digestion go smoothly.
We have the essential workers screaming for PPE.
Teachers trying to tame the hoard over ZOOM.
People out of work drinking and "weeding".
Tourism shut down completely.
Triple lock-down: your country, city and your house.
Increase in number in fake Nostradamus scaring us with the end of the world.
The rate of divorces has gone up, as well as the domestic abuse.
The "bacon" section on our bodies have exploded just like the pandemic.
We have a flooding of fake tests and testers on the market.
Governments investing millions in defective PPE and medication.
Pharmaceutical companies are fighting for grants promising the best new thing, in regards with a miraculous cure and vaccination.
Listen to the gurus: drink holy pee and stay healthy.
Coronella brought on social media fake advice and news. If my grandmother will be alive, she will be an expert too.
Now they want us to wear not a detecting device not on our ankle, but a bloody app on our "smarties" that will tell everybody in our vicinity when we are sick.
China came up with the next great thing: an app that is tracking every move and that lets the vigilante and the police know that you went rogue, because you need it to get out of the house and buy some groceries.
Coronella, you are so lucky because you have been born in a communist country. People in China are following blindly whatever the government impose. Good luck in getting the same obedience here. We don't even want to wear a mask, and you think you are going to get my benevolent consent to track my every move.
Screw you, I am not on PAROLE. I am lucky to live in a normal country, where the government is asking nicely for your cooperation (please wear a mask, please keep the social distance, even the messages on the buses starts with a please), and if you refuse they do nothing to reinforce it.
The scientists from the University of Alberta came up with a "smartie" too. My friend sends me their app, that apparently, let other people know that you are coming, so they or you, can clear the way, The app works for smart phones, so you, iPhone'Rs, are screwed. All I must do is sign up. But, I am going ...not too!
I refuse to give them the power to collect my private information and use it for blackmail. Let's say that I am a politician and I want to taste "uncharted territories" aka cheating on my wiffie, this will be a golden mine in the next campaign for the opposition.
So sorry, Officer Coronella, this kitty is not on Parole! So, Bye-Bye!
.
I am using Coronella instead of Corona, I think is sound funnier:)
For my readers and reviewers, please forgive me for my bad English, since is my third language, I am using this cheap excuse to ask for your help in correcting the grammar and the other mistakes
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and 2 member cents. For my readers and reviewers, please forgive me for my bad English, since is my third language, I am using this cheap excuse to ask for your help in correcting the grammar and the other mistakes
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