The Halls of Bandy Roo

Deep in the caverns of the dungeon ships
Is a verse contest beyond compare
A florid game like no other
All are welcome there

Remnants of the Billy Ruffian
Bobbed to the edge of the shore
A quirky jostle of curious folk
Were the elves of fairy lore

Historic champs were the Spoonbread Tuffs
Who could weave a lyric or two
Close behind were the Beaufort Biffs
In the Halls of Bandy Roo

Pandy Mandy was a Geekshebub
Fattest of her lot was she
Her group wasn't loaded, but fully smashed
For she was judge, umpire , and referee

The planks may be a track for racers
But verses were the key
A shot would fire with each event
Tossed Scrabble tiles made some flee

A hodgepodge game, some bats and balls
And targets here and there
The jistle and jostle of the belching horde
Made some queasy and unaware

Leanest of the lots came the balladeers
The Spinders of Sondaree
Hated by Pandy, she hooted them off
"No use for a prissy jamboree."

Hated worse were the Gargle Bubs
"You may habble and jabble all you see."
"Scrub those tomes in 'yo grimy tubs."
"But not a breath of praise from me."

From far aloft came a clarion call
The pocket fairies chimed in
Sweet Serena warbled a roving tune
That stilled the quell and din

"Lovers last, forget the past."
"But reminded of all before."
"For fearless lad and lass stood for you"
"Once on a distant shore."

"This sturdy beam brought us aloft"
"It's called The Bandy Roo
"Years ago, caught by the stoutest of hearts."
"Came the villain of Waterloo."

Now Pandy didn't get the tale
But figured all was well
At least the Tuffs hadn't won again
So there's still yummy tales to tell

Thus Pandy weeped with sad relief
And gave Serena a crown or two
Then she bellowed aloud "see you next time"
"In the Halls of Bandy Roo."