It was just after half-past midnight. Richard had been sitting in his car on the phone for about twenty minutes when something unholy emerged from the dark recesses of his bowels. It was just shy of a shart in the dark. The Hyundai Sonata quickly became a chamber of noxious gas. Richard's eyes began to water and his daughter, who had been aware of the situation over the phone, began to laugh hysterically. Richard quickly ended the call and power-waddled into the gas station to use the bathroom. His buttcheeks clenched desperately, the urge to defecate excruciating. It was too late.