General Script posted November 2, 2019

Chapters:

...77 78 -79- 80

Exceptional

a one-scene script

A chapter in the book Scenes

Scene at the Mailbox

by Bill Schott

The scene opens on a rural road at the driveway entrance of an old farmhouse. One man stands next to a mailbox which has the red flag turned up. He is wearing a suit and tie, sunglasses, and is holding a brief case. A mail carrier rides up on a bicycle with the mail pouch straddling a rack over the rear fender. Mail Carrier (MC) Howdy, sir. Beautiful day we're having. Man in Suit (MS) (Emotionless) Where's the mail? MC:  It's right here in this pouch -- uh -- and you are? MS:  Here for the mail. MC:  Right. Well, sir, I have to put this mail in that mailbox right there. MS:  Just hand it to me. MC:  No can do, sir. By the way, who are you? MS:  Current resident. MC:  Oh?  The Applebees don't live here? MS: My name is Applebee. MC:  Well, gee, I thought I knew all the Applebees. MS:  The mail? MC:  Yes, well, like I said, I need to put it in the mailbox. MS:  Why not just hand it to me? MC:  The law says I have to place it in a federally approved mailbox. MS: This mailbox? MC:  Right. MS: After you do that -- place the mail in this federally approved mailbox; what do you imagine I will do next? MC: You will probably pull the mail out of the box. MS: Exactly. So why not skip the box and simply hand the mail to me? MC:  Since I don't really know you, sir. I can't knowingly misdirect the mail. MS:  My name is Applebee. MC: Do you have I.D., Mister Applebee? MS:  I do, but let me ask you something. Once you put the mail in this box and ride off; what do you think I am going to do next? MC: As I said before, you will most likely pull the mail out of the box. MS:  Me -- or anyone, right? MC: Hopefully one of the Applebees. MS: Hopefully? MC:  Well, I can't insure they would be the ones who get the mail. That is the intention though. MS:  What if I am not an Applebee as I've claimed? MC:  Then you will be in violation of federal law. MS:  Will you arrest me? MC: No.  I will alert the local sheriff and he will arrest you. MS:  That must be some important mail you have there. MC:  It's important that I do my job right. That means placing the mail in an approved recepticle. MS: What if I were to tell you that I am not an Applebee?  What if I plan to steal the Applebee's mail?  What then? MC: I wouldn't put it in the box. MS: Then it would be you misdirecting the mail. MC: No, sir. I am in charge of the mail and I can decide if it is mete and right to leave articles where I suspect there may be a problem. MS: Mete and right? MC: Too dramatic? MS:  Maybe. Anyway, you done good, Davey. MC:  Thanks, Mr. Hamsterdam. MS:  There'll likely be postal inspectors showing up from time to time to keep you on your toes. MC:  Right, sir. I will be vigilant. MS:  Okay. Just hand me that mail and be on your way. Davey hands Mr. Hamsterdam the letters addressed to the Applebees. Both men freeze for an entire minute. MS: So close, Davey. So close.   Write A Review Recognized Image from Google Pays one point and 2 member cents. You need to login or register to write reviews. It's quick! We only ask four questions to new members.