Humor Fiction posted July 19, 2019


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The One That Got Away contest entry

I'll Never Forget

by DragonSkulls
























I worked tirelessly for nine days, composing a masterpiece
for a contest. Hours of unforgiving discipline, forcing myself
to carry on. I gave up precious, needed sleep that wore
heavily on my job. Not to mention my duties as a father and
a husband. My children begged for attention, "Please, Daddy,
acknowledge our existence." But I simply couldn't, the deadline
was drawing near. I wouldn't even turn my head to look at them
as they wept.

My wife threatened divorce as she ran into the bedroom, slamming
the door, knowing she'd be spending yet another night in the empty
loneliness of our bed.

I frantically searched the internet to find the perfect picture to
accompany the piece. Then there it was, the perfect sunset,
landscape, colors, the perfect everything. I almost fainted from
the sheer gloriousness of its magnificence, or perhaps the lack
of sleep and nutrition, I wasn't sure.

Two minutes before time ran out is when I finally clicked 'Release.'

I promoted it up to eighty cents but still miles from the glorious front
page. I spent every penny promoting, hoping it would get the
praise it so richly deserved. I waited in anticipation for reviews to
come pouring in, all those dear, sweet reviews. My dream was to
reach the divine "Well Received" list. There, it would so brightly
shine amid the highest of ranking members. I would bask in the
essence of its glory. I waited on bended knee.

My second review was a precious sixer. I nearly wept with excitement.
Six more reviews followed, each offering fives. They so graciously
wished they had a six left to give but sadly, frowny face, :( they didn't.
I got my eight reviews and one was a sixer, though, so I knew I was
going to reach the "Well Received" list. I jumped and danced, praising
the heavens. I was going to make "Well Received."

Then came the FanStory message telling me my dreams had come
true. I was on THE FRONT PAGE. I was ecstatic. The veins pulsating
through my head nearly erupting. This was paradise. If I died that
moment, there would be no greater death. I was on the front page.

Then that's when I saw I had another review.

I clicked on it and went into convulsions. All my muscles savagely
tightened and I flopped on the floor shaking. A newbie gave me a
four. They liked it and found no errors, yet gave my masterpiece a
four star review.

Darkness consumed me when I clicked on the front page and my
piece was no longer there. I shrieked in horror. I lost consciousness
and cracked my skull wide open when I crashed to the floor.

When I came to, it hadn't gotten another single review. I had to do
something. I ran to the front room, grabbed the TV and PlayStation,
then headed to the pawn shop. I guess it was the blood all over my
clothes that made them not want to do business with me. I needed
more promotion money, some way, somehow, so I might relish in
the pure splendor on the precious front page just once more.

I raced home and went on-line. Why you can't sell your children
into slavery I'll never know.

Needless to say, I didn't manage to get any more cash to promote
my entry. It never felt the glory of the front page again. It got a couple
more fivers then just faded to dust in my pathetic excuse of a portfolio.

I'll never forget, never...that one, six star rating that got away.







 



The One That Got Away writing prompt entry
Writing Prompt
Write a STORY (no poems) with the theme of ?the one that got away?. What got away? How and why did it get away? Tell us in up to 600 words.

Recognized


I created this picture myself. Thank you for reading this ridiculousness.

Wow, I was just informed; I have way too many words. I thought I was
going to have trouble getting anywhere near the 600 word limit. Turns
out, it comes up to more that 800 words. Isn't that just fantastic? Have
no fear. I'll either hack it to pieces to get it within the 600 word range
before deadline or I'll simply pull it. I'm dumbfounded that it came up
to so many words. What can you do? Lol.

Okay, it's been hacked and shredded. It's 600 words now. Not nearly as funny,
in my opinion, but had to be done. Thank you again for reading.
Pays one point and 2 member cents.


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