You hold your nose up in the air
And think you’re somethin’ fine and rare;
Well, no you ain’t, and I am through.
I’ve had enough of snooty you!
 
And just because you’re Siamese,
That don’t make me no low life sleaze;
Lookin’ down your nose, pul-lease!
Like I got some real bad disease.
 
Well, let me tell you what, old girl,
You sure ain’t no oyster’s pearl!
And there ain’t nothin’ in this world
Could make me give you one more whirl.
 
And so I’ve got some news for you—
I’m right good at this game, too;
I learn real fast—now don’t go ‘way,
There’s somethin’ I would like to say:
 
While you were settin’ your sights higher
I found my true heart’s desire;
And you’ll see—I ain’t no liar—
She’s a real, pure bred, spitfire!
 
She thinks I’m the cat’s meow
Well, ‘course I am, but anyhow,
I never have to act high brow
No place, no time, no way, no how.
 
And so, my dear, I hope you find
A dude who’ll always toe the line
And maybe walk two steps behind
(And treats you like a concubine!)