How does a person deal with sorrow so deep that even a ray of light can not reach its depths?
Sorrow that goes beyond human understanding of rhyme or reason
Layers upon layer with each passing year another shovel of dirt to cover the hurt.

At eleven my mother committed suicide.
Then uncles, aunts, cousins, brothers, friends and ex-wives all die.
My three-year-old granddaughter drowns.

Am I being punished for some unknown sin?
Is everyone I love or have loved doomed?
Life is hard but then my only son commits suicide.

How does a man keep standing?

Alcohol and drugs are not the answer. I tried it all.
Women, too, can't take away the pain for very long.

It raises its ugly head and laughs at me.
"You'll never be okay", it whispers in my ear.
Anger buried so deep rises to the top.

Tears are seldom found on my face.
They dried many years ago.
Instead, I am left walking with pain as my companion.

Is there any hope?
Then I fell to my knees
God in His mercy heard my voiceless plea

My soul found the answer
I still walk daily with the pain
But now my Savior walks with me.