As always, the alarm clock woke me to calming melodies of light rock, which I was enjoying over breakfast when the telephone rang. Who in hell calls at five in the morning?

I jumped up, uneasily grabbing the phone off the wall, and grumbled, "Yeah?"
An unfamiliar voice replied, Yeah!
Me: Whaddya want?
The Voice: Who wants to know?
Me: You're wasting my time.
The Voice: Sorry, Eddie, Ralph here. I just wanted to see if I could fool you.
Me: I'm not Eddie!
The Voice: Sorry, wrong number. (Click.)
Me: Too bad, interesting guy... and I was just getting to like him. Maybe he'll call back. 
TEN MINUTES LATER -  RING!
Me: Hello Ralph. I'm not gay.
My Mom: Neither am I, and I'm not Ralph. 
Me: I know you're neither, Mom.
Mom: I'm glad we can have these little heart-to-hearts, honey. Take care. (Click)

My Mom's a kidder.